crime

Woman who sought police help twice against abusive husband murdered by him

58 Comments

Police said Friday they have arrested a man in Iwate for allegedly killing his wife with a hammer.

The man, who has been named as 34-year-old Junichi Kumagai from Yahaba, called police after he allegedly hit his 30-year-old wife, Kaori Kumagai, on the head with a 20-cm-long hammer, just after noon on Thursday, NTV reported.

Police say she was rushed to hospital for treatment and Kumagai was initially arrested on a charge of attempted murder. Kaori was treated at the hospital for around four hours before succumbing to her injuries. Police said Friday the charge has been changed to murder.

Neighbors of the couple told reporters that they believed Junichi Kumagai to be a violent man, NTV reported. Police say that Kaori Kumagai had visited police twice before to seek help following cases of domestic violence.

Kumagai was quoted by police as saying that he blacked out at the time of the attack.

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58 Comments
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I'm not sure what can the police legally do in these cases, if the wife willingly goes back home to the husband. If she was physically abused, she could get him arrested, but probably she didn't want to fill charges. I guess another way is to leave the guy, get a restrain order, and tell him to undergo therapy or you leave him for good.

-4 ( +3 / -7 )

Man that sucks. I don't get the impression the police take DV seriously and a person would probably lose confidence to go back to the police based on their attitude. Sad way to die and predictable.

13 ( +14 / -1 )

The police can't stop every crime from happening. That's the nature of the universe, crimes will happen.

Why did she choose this guy in the first place and why did she stay with him?

-2 ( +11 / -13 )

When I reported my ex wife (yes wife) for repeated DV against me, the police said "we cannot do anything until an actual crime has been committed"...

I asked "what about crime prevention", which seemed to annoy them and they asked me to leave...

28 ( +29 / -1 )

DV is never taken seriously in this country whether it's men attacking women or women attacking men.

No matter what though, all cases of men being abused by their wives is 100% completely ignored. Japanese women have every right to brutalize their spouses. It's not considered DV if it's done by a woman.

8 ( +14 / -6 )

A woman's got to want to help herself before the police can step in.

-1 ( +6 / -7 )

Could some one not rely on the inept granny state and pro-actively make a DV shelter with counseling services?

Perhaps a female politician could grow a pair and take a stance.

6 ( +8 / -2 )

This comes JUST after authorities were talking about EYEING stricter measures in regards to stalking laws, and is yet another example of why they are absolutely needed. Stop EYEING the stricter measures and make them stricter -- then ENFORCE them!! I'm so tired of reading of cases like these, where the police wait until after a murder to do something about what they could have prevented beforehand (well, possibly prevented).

As for him 'blacking out' before the attack, let him black out before being beaten daily in prison for 20 years.

5 ( +9 / -4 )

NetNinja, stop making this into a "men are sooo discriminated against" issue! Geez. DV is always a problem, even if it's a woman abusing a man, yes. But it strikes of someone really butthurt to go into a thread about a man bashing a woman's brains in and complaining that men have it so rough.

Anyway, yeah, police need to take complaints of domestic violence as seriously as possible. Emotional abuse can render it nearly impossible for a victim to leave - these people need our help, not our condemnation.

8 ( +14 / -6 )

Police wont act untill there is some actual visible injuries and even then they will fail to act effectively, It is a very difficult situation for anyone to be in DV here.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

This heartbreaking story is a lesson to all victims of domestic violence; the police cannot (or will not) help you. Forget about law enforcement and get out of the house. And maybe it's time for us a society to begin creating shelters for victims of domestic violence---for men as well as women---so they have a place to escape to.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

keep having those meetings and thinking about what to do about violence. and the violence continues...........so SAD

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Police failing to do their job... AGAIN!

6 ( +7 / -1 )

Sadly, why am I not surprised. Few women shelters, very little education for those abused, no place to go, no support... Lord knows how many women here (and men) are abused on a regular basis and have no place to go and no the cops won't help. Having women being financially dependent on men is also a huge issue. What exactly are they going to do with no money, no support and no place to go.

RIP poor women. I hope your death finally wakes this nation up when it comes to spouse abuse.

4 ( +10 / -6 )

tokyokawasakiAPR. 13, 2012 - 12:33PM JST

When I reported my ex wife (yes wife) for repeated DV against me, the police said "we cannot do anything until an actual

crime has been committed"...

So DV isnt' a crime then? WTF?

8 ( +8 / -0 )

@Aliasis Yes, it always goes that way when you trying to get a message out. Every effort must be made to discredit someone who is bringing up an issue that society would prefer to ignore. He must be this, he must be that, speculation after speculation, what's his motivation? Conjunction junction, what's your function?

My function is this.....put the "and" in there. Men and women are abused "but" only one group, the women, are truly recognized as victims. You think it's only physical abuse. Man comes home, finds all his stuff destroyed. Woman jumped all over his 7 series BMW in high heels. For most, it's just a good story and a good laugh over beer. For the guy it is clearly abuse. Just because she can't throw a proper uppercut doesn't mean she can't cut you up good and proper with a knife.

Poor DV guy found himself cut up one night. Wife threw a tantrum. Slashed his arms up good and proper. Police roll in and she gives them a twisted story. The Japanese police start to lecture him about how HE doesn't understand Japanese culture and he brought that on himself. Man says: Hey, if you aren't going to arrest her can you at least take her to her parents house. I won't drive with her. Police say: Nope, she lives here. Good night.

Even with the secret spycam alarm clock video camera the police refuse to arrest the woman for DV. You just didn't hear about it. That story didn't make it to JapanToday.

If I've got something to say about seeking equality for men it's bound to help you or someone you know. It's only some men's pride or feeling of embarrassment to not come forward and report this kind of abuse.

Even in the book of Genesis, Eve's first action was to abuse and deceive her partner Adam once she found fault with herself.

-2 ( +5 / -7 )

@ ExportExpert - Police wont act until there is some actual visible injuries and even then they will fail to act effectively, It is a very difficult situation for anyone to be in DV here.

Nope. Not even with evidence. I twice turned up at the laid-back and cozy baseball TV box (Koban) with injuries. Once (at 03:00 am) I had blood coming out from the inside of my right ear and my left eye was bruised and swollen. They told me to be a man and sort things out myself. I could tell they were just mocking me and they seemed more interested to go back to their other more important duties... They (J-cops) are pathetic and untrained when it comes to recognizing and dealing with DV cases...

8 ( +11 / -4 )

Tokyokawasaki, I know and understand what you mean. Even if the police WITNESS the violence they still wont act, unless of course the attacker is lost and looking for directions or is riding a bicycle.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

Forget asking the police, ask the yakuza instead.

6 ( +7 / -1 )

@tokyokawasaki: You should have threatened to sue them that is really crap.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

To the guys complaining, grow a pair and get out of the marriage before she kills you. Otherwise please shut the heck up!

To every guy that is in a situation with DV there has to be AT LEAST a 1000 women that are suffering too and have it worse because of the laws and police here.

Moderator: Please do not tell anyone to shut up. That is ill-mannered.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Clearly the keystones DONT wanna work unless FORCED to! Idiots

6 ( +6 / -0 )

smithinjapanAPR. 13, 2012 - 12:46PM JST This comes JUST after authorities were talking about EYEING stricter measures in regards to stalking laws, and is yet >another example of why they are absolutely needed. Stop EYEING the stricter measures and make them stricter -- then >ENFORCE them!! I'm so tired of reading of cases like these, where the police wait until after a murder to do something >about what they could have prevented beforehand (well, possibly prevented).

I noticed the same thing. A real shame the police cannot or will not do more in stalking cases.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

ayler really thinks the yaks would sympathize with the women? Not from what I've seen.

Myself, I became acquainted with a woman who had an abusive husband. He'd bash her about the head and she'd spend a week or so at a time in bed with black eyes, and concussions by the sound of it. Twice the police came after she'd called 110 but they only ever spoke with the husband calling out "are you alright?" to a darkened room. "Yes I'm ok" she called back both times. And that was the end of it. Case closed. She wasn't dead as far as they could tell, not yet at least. And that was that.

Fortunately there were support groups and a shelter in our area. My partner and I got that out to her and that was the last we saw of her. No surprise with today's story. I just wonder about the neighbours and if something could have been done.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

So if she had visited twice to get help, what happened both those times? Key piece of information missing. Did she voluntarily return to him, perhaps because of nowhere else to go (need more shelters and other support services) or did the police tell her to go away (police procedures need changing.) Or are both of these things issues?

Either way I hope this cowardly b%$##% burns in hell. And what the hell on the neigbours??! They KNEW him to be a violent man, but they did nothing? No-one offered to take her in, hide her, send her somewhere, DO something? I understand - we dont know that information and I may be judging them harshly, but it doesnt sound like they did much.

@tokyokawasaki - glad you are out of your situation, and hope you are now recovered, well and happy after the experience. I cant understand what makes women turn violent against their spouses. Is it just inability to control or express their emotions?

-2 ( +2 / -4 )

I personally come from a family where step father always physically abused my mother. It was never ending. I'm happy my mom is no longer with that looser.

I feel for women who have to go through this. It is very unfortunate that nobody was able to help this poor lady. It's a shame on society.

In my heart I have zero sympathy for men who abuse women. Just thinking about it brings the devil out in me. Absolutely no mercy for such looser scummy and cowardly men.

In my apartment some guy was always abusing his wife. I told my wife to call the cops and report it. Cops did show up but they really seemed useless. Wish cops were aggressive with these types of men. Anyways after that, i never heard the looser abusing his wife again. I doubt he stopped though, probably just keeps his voice down and doesn't bang things.

Be a good citizen, be proactive and don't turn the other way when you see things like this happening next door.

5 ( +5 / -0 )

Thank God nothing happened to you, Tokyokawasaki since the police would only take action when the crime DID happened. It goes the same in some other countries as well. in My country years ago, police would act the same, until the lawmakers have to make new laws on women and children and the police would act if there is a report on spouse abuse. it is still a long way to go, but at least something. do they have some sort of half way house for those seeking help in Japan?

0 ( +0 / -0 )

one thing, don't you find it funny, we keep on reading news on police flashing his manhood to school girl, pouncing on them, auctioning off their uniforms and what not, when the real work that they are supposed to do were not done. oh! don't forget, one even took a wooden sword from the kendo dojo in his office to replace the missing evidence

3 ( +3 / -0 )

@fidaruzki- Not sure what is available now but at the time of the case I mentioned, quite some years ago, there was shockingly little considering the population of Osaka. The listings at both the city office and the prefectural office were scant.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

The only advice I was offered by the police when requesting help dealing with my violent ex-wife was...... Speak to a lawyer.

I am 100% sure that if a fellow gaijin laid just one finger on a Japanese person, and the Japanese claimed DV the police would have acted both swiftly and aggressively.

How do I know this.... The second time I reported my ex-wife for extremely violent and continual DV, abuse, threats etc, etc. I stood there covered in blood and bruises and my t-shirt was ripped and hanging off my shoulders, one of the police officers called my ex-wife and spoke to her. He came out from the back of the Koban, spoke to his colleague and then they both pinned me to the floor, handcuffed and arrested me.... Took off my clothes and put me in a cell.

The next day, after my lawyer arrived, I found out that I was arrested for threatening my ex-wife with a knife...... Apparently this is what she told them on the phone. Obviously I was pissed off, but what rights does a gaijn really have? Exactly. I had to go straight to the hospital and was given a full medical and CT scan (due to the blood coming out of my ear). Caused by a fractured skull :(

Bottom line, I have ZERO respect for the useless and xenophobic Japanese police. They are clueless about DV and they seem uninterested if the victim is not Japanese.....

10 ( +11 / -1 )

@tokyokawasaki, so what happened afterwards? did the case get settled?

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Nothing, I had no choice but to leave MY own home. I could not press charges, because I did not want my daughter (6 at the time) to go through any more stress. Me leaving seemed to be the best option for the sake of my daughter (Yes, I see her at least once every week)...

0 ( +1 / -1 )

stipend, that is sad. but then again, the same goes with other Asian countries I think. tokyokawasaki, I take it you must be a foreigner, judging from your story. must be really hard when the authorities have stigma against foreigners and one can't be always running to the embassies to get help. however, I strongly believed, irregardless what it is, and who the person are, as long as the foreigners living in a country follows the country's law, there is no reason for the authorities to close their eyes on crimes done to them, even if the culprit is local. law should be colour/race blind

0 ( +0 / -0 )

For once I'd like to read a positive story about Japan and how it's working on preventing DV rather than encouraging the opposite by doing nothing

0 ( +1 / -1 )

This problem is swept under the carpet here and when meeting divorcees I have heard that DV was a factor.

It's a pity that Japan is so I unprogressive in this field......

1 ( +1 / -0 )

I had to call the police 4 times because my wife was being abusive and waving knives around,kicking me and punching,scratching.Even in front of our daughter.She finally cut me when I tried to remove a knife from her intoxicated hands.The police were actually pretty supportive but it was me that refused to press criminal charges because I wanted her to change and didn't want to lose my little girl..there was nowhere for me to go and no way I was going to leave my girl with an irrational and violent woman who had no way of supporting her.However I finally realised I wasn't going to win a court case and started sending stuff home.The wife went to a lawyer behind my back and he basically got stuck into her saying she was the problem,needed to get proper mental health counselling and would be unlikely to get custody based on what she told him.Stung her for 20000 yen to hear that.She apologised to me and I haven't had a peep out of her since then. She is doing well and is emigrating to Australia with me...had I pressed charges she wouldn't have had a chance of a visa. I am happy now but I had a heart attack from all the stress so it has taken a toll on me. I feel for people who are on the receiving end, especially when it is sometimes just pure selfishness and could be solved by better mental health support or family counselling.My wife still hasn't gone down that road so now I know I was just the punching bag for all of her anger.She changed overnight. I have no love for the Osaka police but they were very supportive and helpful in my case.They finally said to me 'get a divorce or file charges..either way we can't do much more for you if you don't'. Which was very true.I also had lots of video evidence that I still keep-but I think my wife will get better counselling back home and that and will be adequate. I was the rare lucky one.

4 ( +5 / -1 )

i never said they'd sympathise. they'll do for money what the police won't.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

@Darren Brannan and tokyokawasaki, man, unbelievable what you guys had to put up with. Glad to see things turned out well (for the most part).

I am surprised that tokyokawasaki gets to see his daughter. This divorce culture here is unfathomable. I can never understand how once you get divorced, the parent without custody is as if he/she never even existed.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

Its odd how we have two people here we never met, but since its clear that one is violent and one is dead, the dead is assumed to be as innocent a new born baby. And as other posters have pointed out with personal stories, yes indeed, some women go to the police with bold faced lies about their own innocence.

So excuse me if I don't jump on the bandwagon people. I have the sense and experience to know that I am not clairvoyant. I just don't know what happened, and I am not going to guess or go with my imaginations and daydreams.

Of course I don't begrudge this his murder charge because I doubt it was a case of reasonable self-defense. But what is really in question here is the behavior of the police. Well, again I point you to posters stories above. And that is not even to say I believe their stories! No! The point is its really hard for people outside the equation to decide who is rotten apple, or indeed, if they both are! Neither one involved will ever admit wrong, and the one who is wrong is always a sneaky, slippery, lying SOB. They will bloody their own nose to make it look good. And that is assuming, again, that its not both who are rotten. I hardly ever know what to think when I am not close to two people in a DV situation. I can hardly fault the cops for not being clairvoyant either.

If you are being subjected to DV and truly fear for your safety, then you have to get out. You cannot expect anyone to magically read both minds and then choose the right side. We don't if your spouse is wrong, you are wrong, or if you are both wrong. But if you truly value your life and health, so do most people, and many will help you to get out. Just don't expect us to bust in cracking a skull because we hardly every know which is the right skull to crack.

-4 ( +1 / -5 )

Apart from the obvious act of murder, the fact that this sub human called the police and not an ambulance after he cracked open his wife's skull demonstrates that he didn't care at all about his wife, and that he is a sick, selfish, stupid, psychologically unstable, brutal, piece of trash.

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Sad. But the titles wording makes no sense in english... I think it does I don't know I'm not fluent english speaker. Anyways! The police should have known that SOMTHING was up at this house if she called twice.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Wasn't there a story just yesterday about how police are going to crack down on stalkers and start doing more crime prevention...oh well, there goes that plan. Chalk up another one for the jpolice. Winning the public trust more and more everyday

0 ( +1 / -1 )

oh well, there goes that plan.

They should line up in front of your house and apologize personally for not fixing it all in 24hrs. Don't let anyone ever tell you have high expectations!

And oh yeah! Stories like this only happen in Japan! Never forget that!

-4 ( +0 / -4 )

a very similar case of police incompetence: http://www.koreabang.com/2012/stories/incompetent-police-fail-to-prevent-horrific-murder-of-woman.html

0 ( +0 / -0 )

People are real quick to condemn the police, but really slow to spell out exactly what the police could and should have done that they didn't.

Just because she sought help does not mean she filed charges which is something of a requirement if the police are going to do anything outside of giving the husband a good talking to. But of course if they do that and the wife gets murdered, that also becomes the fault of police.

But hey, if you want to test this theory, have someone beat your face bloody. Go to a police station and say it was "that guy". Demand they do something but refuse to file charges. Then watch in awe as they show you the door.

The reason the police demand charges be filed is so that they don't get played. And they have been played in the past. And when they got played the public was mad at the police!

The public and simple reality have put the police between a rock and a hard place. And so the public gets mad at the police for failing to move!

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

And what the hell on the neigbours??! They KNEW him to be a violent man, but they did nothing? No-one offered to take her in, hide her, send her somewhere, DO something?

Wow Nicky. You have no idea what they've done or not done. I personally have called the cops on DV, the cops came, talked to both of them... The guy was outside kicking the door as she locked him out. She didn't call the cops. I did as it was scaring me. I didn't know the women and no idea what happened in the end. People here don't speak to their neighbours - we've both said this on other threads. It isn't the neighbours job to get her out of the situation and hide her - more so when the guys is obviously violent and could take things out of those trying to help. Japan needs more support for these women but I don't think we can start blaming neigbours.

I have two married acquaintances who are both batsh*t insane - both have called the cops on each other for DV. The cops show up, talk to them both and they both state that they don't want charges pressed. Cycle continues. Not much the cops can do in cases like this if they won't press charges. I've offered to go to counseling, been there for both of them but... they don't want to see to help themselves. Both come from DV families and sadly, I think they think it is normal. They now have a baby and I feel for that kid. I also feel for the neighbours who have to listen to their fights. Not fair on anyone around. More education is needed in this area - for the cops AND the locals. Again, women not being financially independent is a huge issue with women being able to up and leave.

To the male posters who have crazy wives, wow. Were there any indications before marriage they were like this or did they just change?? Frightening.

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

Several problems here... The wife went to the police to seek help, then WENT BACK TO THE GUY SHE WAS AFRAID OF... not once but twice.

Secondly, what CAN the police do? Nothing until a law has been broken. Or do you want a literal "police state" where an unfounded accusation results in your arrest? The police's hands are tied unless she swears out formal charges and even THEN if there's no corroborating evidence there probably will be no arrest.

The police are not the ones at fault here, the woman is for returning to the man she was (justifiedly, as it turns out)afraid of. Well, actually the MAN is at fault for committing the murder, but the woman gave him the opportunity after she had identified him as dangerous.

-1 ( +1 / -2 )

In alot of situations where the wife goes to the police for help it's because she has no where else to go. Most abusive men seek out women that are docile with not good family ties or no family at all for them to run to when they mistreat them. It is probably why she went to the police instead of a father or brothers for protection. IT is also why she would have had no choice but to go back especially if she had children and he wouldn't let her take them with her. When you go to the police you hope they could help you and if you have children go to an undisclosed place for battered women that not only help you get a new life but also free legal council to begin divorce proceedings and a protective order. Most women at the least expect the police to give them a protective order against their husband that say they can only come within so many feet of her, then accompany them back to the house to either get their things or put him out until it can be legally rectified. In America they do this for you and it helps toward your case to show you took legal steps to protect yourself before you might be forced to kill him before he kills you. More women in other countries are going to have to fight for their rights as the women did here and still are. In some countries women are treated like cattle, traded into families for doweries and abandoned by their families. It is just wrong that it's still going on.

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Many Japanese are too scared to call the police on their own horrible neighbors, they are afraid that the guy beating his wife etc..will come after them, but me?? Hell no! I am not Japanese and a few years ago, I did have an idiot next door beating his wife or girlfriend and I let the police know, in a few minutes about 10 police came and took the scum bag away! Why are Japanese so afraid of calling?? This is a big problem in Japan and I guess not only Japan, but I actually love calling the police, when they ask me what country (am I from) on purpose I tell them I think the criminal is Japanese or looks Japanese, then they ask me again the same stupid question as to what country I AM FROM?? Then I tell them KANKEI NAI DAROU!! It does not matter where I am from, since I am calling the police to get them to catch or stop a criminal, and actually now they never ask what country am I from when I call the Japanese police on their 110 number and just do what they have to do. Anyway, RIP poor woman up there in Iwate.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

The wife went to the police to seek help, then WENT BACK TO THE GUY SHE WAS AFRAID OF... not once but twice.

Where else is she suppose to go? If she doesn't have a job, has no money and no family or friends around, she really doesn't have much of a choice. Japan needs shelters. Period.

Secondly, what CAN the police do? Nothing until a law has been broken. Or do you want a literal "police state" where an unfounded accusation results in your arrest? The police could contact a social worker and get someone to help her - of course, this would be if they had such a system in place and offered shelter and support. I don't think asking the police to help someone makes it a "police state". No one said anything about arrests. You're creating situations in your mind that aren't even being discussed. IF and when someone abuses a spouse, yes, they should be arrested. That doesn't make it a police state either - perhaps you don't understand what a police state is?

-5 ( +2 / -7 )

Secondly, what CAN the police do? Nothing until a law has been broken.

And since when is assault not a crime? I'm sure that this woman is not going to the police just to report that she had an argument with her husband. Assault is a definitely an arrestable offense and the police should have taken action earlier.

Secondly, if the neighbors say that the man is violent, then the abuse must have been VERY obvious! BIG FAIL for the police. I would be livid if the police turned me away like that!

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Japan needs shelters. Period.

Yup. But its not the fault of police that there aren't any.

of course, this would be if they had such a system in place and offered shelter and support.

Again, not the fault of police it isn't there.

IF and when someone abuses a spouse, yes, they should be arrested.

And when the police start trying to do that and wind up harrassing innocent people whose spouses lied, I am sure all the people blaming the police here will tear into the police for that.

You are expecting the police to know what they cannot possibly know. And with all the DV cases they come across they will have to triple available holding areas for all the arrests they are going to wind up making. Can you imagine the paperwork? Pretty much police are going to have drop everything to handle DV, and all for people who refuse to file charges against a spouse?

How about this? How about YOU get those shelters started? You could start knocking on doors for donation money.

-3 ( +0 / -3 )

And since when is assault not a crime?

Its a crime. But its only chargeable if people file charges, and for good reason. Police would be arresting people left and right if they made assault arrests with no charges filed. Then they would get hit by a tsunami of false arrest lawsuits.

You want this fantasy of perfection but refuse to consider the practical gorey details.

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

Teflon, I don't blame the police for their being no shelters. I blame the government. I blame society for looking the other way and pretending that this issue isn't a huge issue. However, when a person goes to the police for help, I don't expect them to be turned away. They need to listen and investigate if something happened. If something did, they need to get off their butts and do something about it. What is the % of people who made false claims compared to those who don't? Probably pretty slim.

Can you imagine the paperwork? Heaven forbid someone has a mountain of paperwork to do rather than have someone killed. Where are your priorities?

How about this? How about YOU get those shelters started? You could start knocking on doors for donation money. How do you know I don't do this already?

-5 ( +3 / -8 )

Its a crime. But its only chargeable if people file charges, and for good reason. Police would be arresting people left and right if they made assault arrests with no charges filed. Then they would get hit by a tsunami of false arrest lawsuits.

When a person goes to the police with an assault and/or domestic violence claim, they should be able have to have a reasonable expectation that the police would at THE VERY LEAST investigate the claim (check for bruises, lacerations, or other physical injuries). And if there are, I would think it would be their responsibility as the police to at least bring the offender in for questioning...at LEAST.

An arrest doesn't automatically mean jail time. It means that you're under suspicion of committing a felony. IMHO, if the wife had to go to the police twice about this, and event he neighbors knew he was violent...then the police didn't do enough and its a massive failure on their part.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

tokyokawasaki: Really messed up, makes me feel like I need to put cameras in my house or something

1 ( +1 / -0 )

@Darren Brannan

My spouse is similar but not to the point where knives come out. I've had enough so I'm moving on. If you move to Australia, you might be in a better position to protect your daughter with Child Safety but that could lead to complications. But as for the local police, I've not found them helpful. She screams, they come. After explaining that she is the instigator, they take notes and go on their way.

You can get a restraining order which is useless unless you live in a separate place.

Anyway, sorry to say this folks, but the police overseas are not different to the ones in Japan with respect to DV. So, I'm saying this in a friendly way - don't kid yourselves.

@TokyoKawasaki, sorry but it's not just a "gaijin" thing. First and foremost, it's the assumption that the husband/boyfriend is the guilty party - unless they come over often enough that you know them by name.

General advice - If your spouse, (not being sexist here) is like this, start over. Don't ruin your own life to accomdate their behaviour.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

in the bigger picture, everybody has to play their role, however small. neighbours should alert the police if they suspected there is abusive behaviour next door, police have to go and investigate (that is their job to make sure it was not some random calls made to smear people's name), families need to extend their help for those who had married out and the society has to be vigilant about abusive behaviour and how people is being treated amongst them. it can be done, although not overnight because same thing might happened to our family

0 ( +0 / -0 )

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