Pity those with 'monster neighbors'

I got a neighbor that smokes all the time, Even with all doors and windows shut I can smell it.

I also got a neighbor kid that plays basketball outside. The "thump thump thump" comes straight in my window.

But good fences, as they say, makes good neighbors. J-houses are so tiny, so close together, and the walls are so thin, if you laugh out loud while watching your TV you'll bother the neighbors.

My neighbor USED to smoke.

I guess our place is even better "soundproofed" than I thought - nobody's tried to kill me yet when I "murder" Schubert or Beethoven on the piano... ! And we're still very good friends with our immediate neighbours !

She hollers at the top of her lungs so that the whole neighborhood hears, “She wants us to smoke in the house, doesn’t care what it does to the baby’s lungs!”

Or maybe the father can go outside the building, instead of smoking on the balcony.

Selfishness is on the rise even in communal Japan. The way people drive and park for example. Smoking in public areas when all smokers know now that their second hand smoke poisons kids and kills thousands annually. But, everyday still you can observe wonderful courtesy in this country that is not generally seen in the west.

Unless we all live in the country side then we going to have neighbours so we just have to deal with them.

This is one of the main reasons why I opted for a house. Still live right on top of your neighbors, but that extra 3-4 meters between our houses really makes a difference.

"a litany of complaints... garbage..."

Hey, they pick up burnable trash at my place only twice a week, if I have a full bag or bags before pick-up day, they have to go out on the veranda where they stink until pick-up day. Even if I double bag 'em they stink especially in summer.

"Then there’s the outdoor smoker. His wife just had a baby and doesn’t allow smoking in the house. So he smokes outside. He means no harm, but at least one of his neighbors, a 53-year-old woman, suddenly finds her house reeking of tobacco. She addressed the man’s mother, a friendly woman who immediately apologized and promised to speak to her son. Which she did – only to arouse the wrath of her daughter-in-law, whose venom with regard to the complainant knows no bounds. She hollers at the top of her lungs so that the whole neighborhood hears, “She wants us to smoke in the house, doesn’t care what it does to the baby’s lungs!”

That daughter-in-law is an idiot. Her neighbor doesn't want the father to smoke in the house, she just doesn't want him to smoke right outside her place where the smoke drifts in.

"J-houses are so tiny, so close together, and the walls are so thin, if you laugh out loud while watching your TV you'll bother the neighbors."

Heck, to solve that problem all you have to do is have enough income to live in one of those million plus yen a month luxury apartments - those have thicker walls! I know this because I've been inside them a couple of times, though just briefly.

Kaynide, 3-4 meters? Wow, Would love that. I am in Chiba, and honestly there is maybe a meter between homes. I am thinking of buying a condo, as with the thicker walls, makes for a quieter experience imho. Also, why own a house, when all you get for a yard is a driveway?

People need to stop being selfish, and be reasonable when dealing with conflict.

I don't see how any of this is different to what happens overseas.

Or maybe the father can go outside the building, instead of smoking on the balcony.

This.

One of our neighbors is a small time actor whose claim to fame is playing street hoodlums in TV dramas. Although I didn't know it, my missus found him on Facebook (he has a fan club) and he goes to promotional events every other weekend. Moreover, he refines his onscreen persona in everyday life. We often hear him berating some poor door-to-door salesman who his trying to hawk his wares.

Screaming aside, however, he is a rather good chap.

We searched until we found an apartment building in which all the walls/flooring is concrete--not wood. We get on with the neighbors precisely because we can't hear each other!　

Thankfully, one of my neighbours took down her wind chimes before I had to complain.

We often hear him berating some poor door-to-door salesman who his trying to hawk his wares.

Sounds like me when the religions people come to my door trying to spread their propaganda. I'm sure my neighbors have heard me more than once barking at them.

Not sure, but the Norman Rockwell nostalgic memories might be a little too good to be true: community ties were firm and neighbors lived at peace with each other. Not only that, they helped each other out, not grudgingly but gladly..." I think probably people were out working hard most of the day... come night, they were zonked out and with no TV's to bother each other with, it was peaceful. I don't think it was all hunky dori... but probably people were too afraid to speak out so they just "endured"... plus people didn't live so long like now... life was short... and not just in Japan... humans have had to learn to get along from the beginning of time... and we still haven't made a perfect society.

I've had good neighbours and bad neighbours, and sadly the good neighbours never get enough credit, so I make it a point to be friendly and chat with them when and where possible, and help out when I can. The bad neighbours are of two types, of course: a) the type that are not really bad, but do something that gets on yours and perhaps others' nerves, b) the type that ARE bad and deliberately continue bad behaviour despite knowing it bothers others. And with the latter I mean BAD behaviour -- not piano practice, not even smoking on the balcony, but things like playing obscenely loud music at three in the morning, all windows open, or banging on walls and screaming (for now apparent reason), revving a bicycle for half an hour at 5:00 a.m. even louder than normal if someone shouts "Urusaii!", and needless to say those who threaten or assault people who complain. The latter type the police should do something about as in some cases it infringes directly on the laws, but often they do not until you read about the stabbing in the example above.

In my first place here I had a neighbour above me who was a prime example of the criminal type. He dropped VERY heavy objects on the floor at all hours, played electric guitar at full volume at 2:00 a.m., or loud music, used to peak in the windows of mine and others' apartments, and go through our mail if he could reach it in the boxes (most didn't have locks). I tried to approach him once when I saw him doing laundry in the adjacent laundromat but he literally bolted away. Another time I finally gave up trying to sleep and went up to his apartment to ask him to turn down the volume, but instead of answering the door he turned up the volume on his music and began stomping on the floor. The next day I came home to find several shoe prints on my door from it having been kicked, and my mail box lock broken and mail (fortunately nothing special) torn up. So, I finally shrugged and talked to the superintendent, who was a super woman. She, however, told me that she had talked to him before after other neighbours complained (and moved out, eventually!) and he did not change, but that she would consult the land-lady. The land-lady then came to talk to me about moving to another apartment in the building. Yes, apparently it was 'easier' for me to move, go to City Hall and have my gaijin card info changed, go to the banks and post office and every other place under the sun and have my address information changed, including my furikomi information, and what not, than do something about this guy. I asked if I should call the police, and the land-lady chuckled embarrassingly. Fortunately, he moved out a few months later, and when the land-lady and super-intendent saw his room as they were doing an inspection of it with him they began screaming at him, FINALLY. It appears he had smashed the crap out of the walls and flooring, and I heard he had never really cleaned his bathroom the whole time he lived there, etc. So in the end he ruined their apartment, and no one lived above me, thankfully, for the rest of my time there. In other nations the guy would have been out, if not behind bars, long before that had to happen.

J-houses are so tiny, so close together, and the walls are so thin, if you laugh out loud while watching your TV you'll bother the neighbors.

Valentine's Day coming up, better invest in earmuffs!!!

The dog across the street finally died. I delivered them a present.

The neighbor next door uses liters and liters of really stinky fabric softener. It is horrible. You know if they have been in the elevators, hallway...anywhere.

You know nothing, Jon Snow!

I had a neighbor who tried to enter others apartments. She also used to play loud music at 3AM and went nuts when the landlord tried to evict her. I had bosozoku neighbors, with those long white coats with writings on their backs, who s...t in front of the door when they got evicted. I had an elderly neighbor who used to place his garbage in front of my door ( and any other garbage he found in the vicinity) until I complained to the landlord. I had a neighbor who went away leaving her alarm on, so every morning at 4:30 it would start screaming fo an hour, and that lasted about two weeks. I had a neighbor who demanded 2000 yen worth gift as an apology when our cat fell on his balcony. We never let poor animal out after that. Can you imagine how stressful it was for her? And the last, but not least - being the parent of an ADHD child can be a curse. The woman downstairs kept complaining and b...ing until our landlord got fed upand asked us to leave. Mid winter. Now we live on the first floor and at least no one complains about the noise.

Yeah the mythical Japanese WA!!! Anyone who has lived here for a while is going to see more & more of the reality of living in Japan, lots is nice but a lot is a PITA!

When I was young & still stupid I lived in small places with thin walls, got married did the same in places a little bigger but still the same ole............got tiring so I decided ENOUGH.

Ditched my office in Tokyo, moved semi-rurally, work from home & recently bought a cool little mini-minka that I am turning into an office, the price was a steal, building pretty much takes up all the land BUT I saw all round lots that NO ONE was doing anything, first owner I contacted was VERY happy to sell & for dirt dirt dirt cheap. So now I am going to build on a deck so I can work outside if I want, SWEET! And will perhaps down the road buy more again for next to nothing.

And my house, couple neighbours(only 3-4) on one side closest maybe 15m the rest even further away, out front & to the right NOBODY. And I have a huge front yard, ponds trees, I can BBQ on my deck & I have a campfire pit so I can sit out by the fire & relax with a cold one! And all this is WAY WAY cheaper then living in or near the big smoke. And my house is basically a cottage, when GW or Oshogatsu arrive I snap my fingers & I am THERE!

There are other options to the sardine cans in & near the larger cities

I used to live next door to a "gomi yashiki" (garbage tip house) and what was really creepy was that a jobless middle-aged woman was living there alone ... the house belonged to her two elderly parents who were really nice people, but one day they suddenly disappeared. I sometimes saw their daughter shopping in the convenience store late at night. I still have no idea how she paid the rent and utilities, and I don't really want to find out.

Lets make the country next door the neighbor and do away with monsters.

When I came back to Japan around 6 years ago I moved into a brand new apartment building after convincing the landlord that I wasn't HIS image of the typical foreigner- loud, dirty and unreliable. The building contained only single mezzanine style rooms and were quite expensive. A young couple moved in next door and their fights were legendary. When arguing the guy would bang his fists on the wall, throw glasses on the floor, chase his girlfriend around the room and then wale when she locked herself in the toilet. After complaining on a number of times to the owner I then became the target of their anger. After I'd had enough I moved out and into a building where I only had 1 person above and below me- no one on either side. I thought my chances of having difficult neighbors would be slim. To my shock, the couple above me (actually the girl) were so noisy during their "rabu-rabu" time that the neighbors wrote to the landlord asking him to do something which only resulted in the couple opening their bedroom windows to amplify their antics more. To make matters worse, a hostess moved in below me and she would routinely come home at 3am drunk with her boyfriend whereupon they would talk or have parties out on the balcony. No thought whatsoever of how their actions were affecting other people. Bottoms line is "You can pick your friends but you can't pick your neighbors!"

113 meter squared surrounded by 278 metre squared. Who needs the city?

@Elkarlo:

In response to your question (why get a house?) it really depends where you are- city areas/tourist areas are likely to be packed in...but if you live about 30 minutes outside a major city or in a minor one like me, there's a lot more land to be had.

In my case I got lucky really; The house/land isn't huge by any stretch, but we have a nice buffer between the neighbors. Also, I built on a porch to the side (bout 1x3 meters along the side of the house) for laundry and BBQ. As for yard space...there's enough room for 3 cars in front- would be on the side but a biwa tree and my porch are taking up all the space.

My neighbours use their side garden as a dumping ground for electrical appliances and old carpets while their feral kids run wild. Monsters indeed.

Last year I had quite the neighbor...he was an enormous half black, half puerto rican guy who could regularly consume 40+ supreme burritos. Double on Taco Tuesdays. I came to find out after time that the tremors I was feeling multiple times a day, which I thought perhaps was normal due to being in Japan, were the seismic result of this behemoth's bowel movements. Sometimes at 2 in the morning a giant 'bbbbbbbbbbbbbrrrwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaappppp' would startle me awake. Funny thing is, he was somehow the biggest (pun intended) ladies' man I've ever known, and was regularly pulling the hottest young galz from all over the city. Meanwhile, I was just my lonely old self with my green 1967 station wagon and large collection of David Bowie albums that I would usually leave on to drown out said neighbor's nightly exploits. Sometimes, in the silence of the night, even across the Pacific I can still feel the rumbling produced by that legendary Snaffleupagus of a man. bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbrrwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaapppp

As for barking dogs, it's because in Japan most dogs are kept outside, whatever the season, whatever the weather... Our dogs have always been kept IN the house and the ON LY people they ever "annoyed" were "would be burglars"...

elkarlo

.......................... Also, why own a house, when all you get for a yard is a driveway?

Because owning a house and the land is a far better idea than paying rent or owning a apartment which is literally space in the air, the ground is shared with maybe 50 or 200 other residents, that doesn't make sense.

Also many houses come with some yard space, I have a yard with grass, patio bbq area car park trees etc, much better idea than owning a piece of air.

Perhaps even worse than noisy neighbors are neighbors who refuse to even say hello to you.

@uniden

Har! Thanks for that report on Snafflueupagus!

We have neighbours above us who use their washing machine in the middle of the night, every night. It's very noisy and keeps us awake. When my husband complained they denied it. They denied it when our next door neighbours complained too, and when the head of the resident's organisation spoke to them about it. Charming people.

In the summer, i BBQ every other wkend.The neighbors hate it cos I dnt use gas, only top quality "sumi". They prob hate it more that as i bbq, i got my fav pals & playlist (not too loud) going.

I keep it reasonable by going from 4pm - 9ish. Lots beers, laffs & summer nostalgic pastimes.

Is it such a crime? I know this aint' america, but society needs to lighten up sometimes. & if i offered you (neighbor) a sample of some juicy grilled steak as a friendly gesture, would you sincerly accept? Or will you scorn my way of life cause im a "monster"?

J-houses are so tiny, so close together, and the walls are so thin, if you laugh out loud while watching your TV you'll bother the neighbors."

Not a problem. Never once felt the urge to laugh out loud while watching J TV

@Kaynide. Ok, thank you for responding. I am in western Chiba, so that size of property would put me back quite a lot. For me, in my area, a condo may be better, as it is cheaper, easier to maintain, and the walls tend to be really thick.

Sounds like you have a nice place though. Good on you

Crikey! Some proper horror stories on here! But I can assure you that living in the sticks is no guarantee of civility. The chinpira living below me used to have regular parties after midnight on a Sunday. Complaining changed nothing. So I used to open his kitchen door a little and flick the master fuse, shutting the party down. And then on Monday morning at 7am I'd make a looooong smoothie with my blender above his bedroom, sounded like a buzzsaw. Amusingly, he complained to the landlord that his hungover sleep was being disturbed & I got a warning. Go figure

Not sure what to do with my neighbor. Single guy next door, cool car, ladies man. Absolutely nothing wrong with his personality. If I see the guy outside, he speaks. He plays sports. We even see him from time to time picking up little bits of trash in the parking area. So I've got nothing to complain about.

The neighbor on the other side of him tried to gossip to my wife about him though. Her complaints were in fact true but what can we say. You see, this guy was having threesomes and often brought different girls over throughout the week. Okay so he's a cheater with a healthy libido.

We've heard the moaning. We can recognize the 3 different voices going at it. (Yeah we put our ears to the wall). What can we say? I'm not going to complain over someone's good fortune. I'm always supportive and wish the best for others. I know the girls aren't call girls.

It's amazing how older women are ready to complain about such things. I guess he should invite his neighbors, hahaha.

Our old neighbour had new barbed wire all over the balcony border panel when I moved in. Later I found out they replaced it each time a new person moved into my apartment at the time, so it wasn't just me. There was also a complaint about me smoking on the balcony causing their son to be expelled from school for smoking. The problem was I didn't smoke and had been away for a month at the time of the complaint (and showed passport to landlord's rep to prove it!)

But, lucky me, I didn't get the worst of it: the neighbour below the barbed wire apartment told me that every month the dragon mother above them took the husband and the son out onto the barbed wired balcony, cut their hair while seated on sheets, then when finished flapped out the sheets showering all the hair cuttings down on the neighbour below.

It is just impossible to talk with some people, just talk about them.

Not a problem. Never once felt the urge to laugh out loud while watching J TV

BAM!! i had a good chuckle at that one.

I'm absolutely loving your monster neighbour stories. Makes me giggle! Eons ago, Mr. Holly and I lived in a walk up apt. in Tokyo. The first floor was a small, denki-ya san, with an extremely nosy wife. On garbage day, we'd come down from our place and put our garbage out on the street on garbage day. By the time we got home, the obaasan would run to catch up with us going up the stairs while carrying a smaller bag with plastics we mistakenly threw in with the regular garbage. On a weekly basis, she rummaged through all our regular garbage and would take out the plastic and tell us we couldn't throw out "said" garbage on such and such a day. But we are talking minute plastic...a rubber band here, the plastic around batteries there, even a piece of floss. We started mixing our garbage with our cat litter...took time to prepare but she finally got off our backs.

We had a doozy in '95. Someone built a house next door to us but didn't move in for a while, I heard they were planning to move in about a year (in summer of '94). However, we got hit with the earthquake, and their condo in Nada-ku was destroyed,so they moved in. They started haranguing the neighbors about noise...they made the lady across the street line her vending machines with rubber so they couldn't hear the cans falling. They came over to our house and were quite adamant that we were to replace the steel mini-ramp we put over the curb to get into our driveway. We'd just spent 4 man to have it installed, and said we were not planning to replace it right away, but DH would drive in slowly so it didn't clatter. They told us to keep our cats inside because they hated cats. Our cats didn't go outside unless they escaped, but he didn't believe me when I told him that the neighborhood had a feral cat problem...any time he found poop, he put it in our yard, as it was 'from our cats'. I thought "whatever". This was all the first 3-4 weeks they lived there.

I went out one morning to find that he'd put barbed wire in five layers at the top of his fence, and he'd gone back to the wrecked condo and brought back shattered glass from a cabinet and windows and half-buried it in the dirt,so that the broken edges pointed up...if a cat jumped over the fence, they would have been impaled.

The kicker was one night when DH came home late. He got home at 10:30. Around 11:30 we hear an ungodly crash. I leapt up and looked out the window at the head of the bed,and there was no one there. The next morning we found that the windsheild of DH's car had been smashed with a hammer. Good times. We were already slated to move, so just let it go. No proof, anyway.

I always wanted to see his face when he found cat poop after we moved. All our other neighbors have been nice, I'm happy to say...

In the summer, i BBQ every other wkend.The neighbors hate it cos I dnt use gas, only top quality "sumi". They prob hate it more that as i bbq, i got my fav pals & playlist (not too loud) going

Wc,

Don't worry about it, as we can see from all the stories above its not rare to have crappy neighbours, odds are pretty high you will.

The reason people didn't like your BBQ is perhaps because I have found many Japanese just DONT LIKE to know, especially SEE, others having fun, enjoying life! Most Japanese aren't "happy" unless they know their neighbours are sufficiently miserable like themselves. This was another reason why I was happy to move out where there is more space, LESS stress, off to practice my electric guitar now, can crank the amp a bit as the mrs isn't home, good times!

Cool-- GW, u play too? Got me an ESP, Ibanez RG 550 (a Les Paul bck n the states) & an cheap acoustic. No amp, but im sure the neighbors hate when i strum chords too. And you're right- most japanese aren't happy or content with life.

@NathalieB

Not a problem. Never once felt the urge to laugh out loud while watching J TV

It's your comment that made me laugh out loud ! :-)

Wc,

Yeah I "play" a little most nites, I am an old geezer so strat, couple teles, Greco Super Real LP & a few others, not going to bump anyone off stage anytime soon but enjoy noodling some blues etc! Enjoy life I say you only got one, too bad too many locals don't seem to figure that out or only LATE in life!