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What irritates men most about women? Let's find out

85 Comments

Once upon a time men were hunters and women were child-bearers and life was simple, if precarious. We’re a long way from that now, and yet how far after all? asks Spa! (Oct 27). Men and women love each other, certainly, but they also irritate the hell out of each other. Spa! in the past has explored men’s capacity for irritating women; here it surveys 600 men, company employees in their 30s and 40s, married and single, how women irritate them.

In many, many ways, they answer – depending on time and place and circumstance, naturally, but boiling down to one central fact: men as hunters were once in unchallengeable control of their women but no longer are. Rationally, for the most part, they’ve accepted it and even learned to enjoy it – but instincts are instincts, genes are genes. When society imposes one set of norms and genes another, there is conflict and irritation.

Guess, reader, which complaint ranks above all others in the domestic sphere - far above, for example, disputes concerning the children’s education, which at number 9 barely makes the top 10; or the number 5 complaint: “If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair.” The top grievance among husbands and boyfriends is: “Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied; she makes like she’s the only one whose working!” Ninety-five percent of respondents – 567 of the 600 – feel victimized in this way. It seems trivial, but then, so does anything that, recurring on a daily basis, swells to monstrous proportions with the passage of time. “And when I play with the kid, she doesn’t even consider that housework!” fumes a 34-year-old husband and father.

The number 1 complaint among male employees regarding female coworkers is the latter’s alleged tendency to beg off working overtime for personal reasons, whether a date or housework piling up at home. “If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!” is what one 41-year-old man would like to say – but prudently keeps his mouth shut – in such cases. A close second in the long list of office complaints is women’s perceived readiness to cry “Power harassment! Sex harassment!” to anything, however allegedly innocent. And third, not very far behind, are the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart. Can men be blamed for being confused?

There’s no help for it: men’s brains and women’s brains are different. They see the world differently – and it’s a difference that kicks in in infancy, around age 8 months, Spa! hears from artificial intelligence researcher Ihoko Kurokawa. In an evidently over-simplified but useful nutshell, the brain has two hemispheres; right: art, imagination, intuition; left: logic, science, math. The two hemispheres, Kurokawa explains, are better connected in women than in men, which helps account for women’s emotional response to things men scarcely notice.

Thus, the number 1 grievance of men about the women they date: “She suddenly gets angry and won’t tell me why!” – presumably because she thinks he should know, but it’s not stupidity that keeps him in the dark, it’s the configuration of the male brain.

There’s a solution to all this, says relationship consultant Mayumi Nimatsu, and it turns out to be the obvious one: frank and open dialogue. Men and women are different, but not to the point of being beyond each other’s intellectual reach. The sexes can understand each other. When are they going to start realizing that potential?

© Japan Today

©2020 GPlusMedia Inc.

85 Comments
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What irritates men most about women? Probably the same things that irritate me most about men.

-4 ( +13 / -18 )

Personally speaking, when one minor incident or disagreement becomes the basis for years of bashing. Typically I have found that men are much more able to let things go than women. The women that I know tend to have selective memories, more so than men that I know.

Again that is my opinion, and from my experience, and am not generalizing about ALL women, just the ones I know, or have known.

25 ( +30 / -4 )

In Japan, the squeaky voice used when being "polite"....

12 ( +20 / -8 )

“If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!” is what one 41-year-old man would like to say –

That's the reason why you have defined working hours. The fact that the guy would just sit there and "take it" and not say to the boss that I have a life outside of work speaks volumes on who wears that pants in that office. I get that you may have to work OT from time to time, don't have a problem with that. But if the expectation is that you come to work everyday and stay over to get the job done, then you either need to learn better work habits and find out what part of your day is being wasted, or get additional employees to handle the load or get rid of the guy who complains about people going home on time.

22 ( +25 / -3 )

company employees in their 30s and 40s...

It seems that these down-trodden corporate yes men are mostly irritated by their career choice as a wage slave, and then take their frustrations with them when they go home and their wife puts a little pressure on them to contribute to family life.

10 ( +15 / -6 )

If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!

No idea what a contract is.

And third, not very far behind, are the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart. Can men be blamed for being confused?

Yes they can be blamed for being confused. I prefer to work in an environment where people pride themselves and look good rather than looking like old women or men who don't care about personal appearance. I will more likely buy from a well groomed male or female than a person wearing a crinkly cheap suit or grandma's handmedowns.

Sounds like the complaints of repressed men who have old brains despite possibly being young. Very sad.

5 ( +9 / -4 )

And when I play with the kid, she doesn’t even consider that housework!” fumes a 34-year-old husband and father.

And any man who thinks playing with their child or children is housework should not have had any to begin with!

28 ( +30 / -4 )

“If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!” is what one 41-year-old man would like to say – but prudently keeps his mouth shut

...at the time. I hear lots of bitching about colleagues on this issue on Tokyo trains.

What the guys fail to realise is that the girls have finished their work, thank you very much, while they're stuck in analysis paralysis or some creative funk caused specifically by lack of time away from the office.

2 ( +5 / -3 )

Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied

Don't help with the housework: do the housework. Different mindset.

If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair.

Consider yourself fortunate in having a partner who considers you attractive enough to worry that other women might take an interest in you.

the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart

Would you prefer your female work colleague wore a burka? Or maybe just stayed at home in the kitchen where she belongs?

She suddenly gets angry and won’t tell me why!

You did something to make her angry and didn't even realise what you were doing because your brain isn't connected up properly.

Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life.

-8 ( +17 / -26 )

Looking forward to read about "What irritates women most about men?"!

3 ( +7 / -4 )

The last hits the nail,if a women wants proper relationship she needs to understand the need to communicate openly and clearly

10 ( +12 / -2 )

Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life.

What kind of analogy is that ?? Plain stupid and sexist comment.. If this is your conception of the male/female relation, I pity you.

3 ( +14 / -11 )

And any man who thinks playing with their child or children is housework should not have had any to begin with!

Well said Yubaru. If one considers spending time with their children work of any kind, they are not a member of a family that I would want to be in.

12 ( +13 / -1 )

in my case the wife coddles my son. he has no chores or part time job. I used to shovel snow, deliver newspapers, throw wood in the wood chipper, deliver pizzas, etc. and still went to a good college. but apparently in japan one must only study study study. I fear his future.

10 ( +11 / -1 )

Hehe, Cleo. I hear you :-)

0 ( +5 / -6 )

Just the very nature of them being women is irritating enough but in that case I really like being irritated. See today's picture of the day and you may get my drift.

-1 ( +2 / -3 )

Such questions are inherently sexist.

1 ( +6 / -5 )

wonder where the list is? want to see where "brings up all her past grievances whether relevant or not to the current argument" come up.

6 ( +7 / -1 )

"What's wrong?" --- Nothing.

5 ( +7 / -2 )

<>You did something to make her angry and didn't even realise what you were doing because your brain isn't connected up properly.Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life.

GTFOH! if men are dogs, then what are women?

6 ( +10 / -4 )

The top grievance among husbands and boyfriends is: “Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied; she makes like she’s the only one whose working!” Ninety-five percent of respondents – 567 of the 600 – feel victimized in this way. It seems trivial, but then, so does anything that, recurring on a daily basis, swells to monstrous proportions with the passage of time. “And when I play with the kid, she doesn’t even consider that housework!” fumes a 34-year-old husband and father.

I know I'm not "satified" if he "helps". He helps make the mess and he needs to "help" clean up. I will say though, if a wife is a stay at home and not helping pay for bills, pretty cheeky in my opinion to be moaning. If she IS helping, what is the ratio? I comment on it as I clearly do far more than he does even though our take home pay isn't all that different. I'd like him to do more - and "help"? Really?? - but I don't want to end up a nag so... some things just don'T get done.

As for commenting about playing with kids as housework, you've got to be kidding me.

6 ( +8 / -2 )

What kind of analogy is that ?? Plain stupid and sexist comment.. If this is your conception of the male/female relation, I pity you.

I agree! I imagine the love life of this type of relationship must be great because that's what every real woman wants: a timid puppy dog with its tail between its legs in the bedroom waiting for the next order to be barked.

Now why was it again that I like Japanese women? Ah, yes...

4 ( +9 / -5 )

@Mr. Noidall, keep going, ur on fire!

the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart.

LoL. This is the motivating factor to "go" to the office every day, if ur a guy. Women know we look. They like that kind of stuff. Gives them some kind of empowerment that they clear lack overall in corporate japan.

Give them a break. Some (married ones) got lots to do at home after a long day in the office.

2 ( +6 / -4 )

but boiling down to one central fact: men as hunters were once in unchallengeable control of their women but no longer are.

Funny, every historian/archaeologist/anthropologist I've heard talk about hunter-gatherer societies suggests that they were more gender-egalitarian than post-agricultural societies. But hey, it feels right to say that our modern gender biases are inherent in our biology because that spares us from having to ask hard questions about how society molds us, so let's just go with it.

5 ( +8 / -3 )

Thus, the number 1 grievance of men about the women they date: “She suddenly gets angry and won’t tell me why!” – presumably because she thinks he should know, but it’s not stupidity that keeps him in the dark

So true. Doesn't matter what country you are in.

7 ( +8 / -1 )

Thus, the number 1 grievance of men about the women they date: “She suddenly gets angry and won’t tell me why!”

Hmmm... While I agree that it sucks when someone is mad at your and won't tell you why, I also don't blame women for getting angry at the guys who were interviewed for this. A bunch of entitled complainers, it sounds like. Calling playing with he kids "work". Griping about coworkers having a work/life balance and going home when they should. Complaining about women wearing sexy clothes being too alluring (sound a little like the "she was asking for it, wearing that dress" cliche).

Anyway, sounds to me that these dudes should be grateful they have ladies willing to put up with their bratty attitudes. Believe me, women and men can be equally annoying, but I'm not putting a lot of validity behind many of these gripes.

5 ( +6 / -1 )

@Cleo: Sometimes your answers seem to come from a woman, and at other times, most definitely from a man.

You are an interesting person.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

the number 5 complaint: “If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair.”

LoL. If you've been caught cheating, you'll hear that one alot. Or if you're an extremely gorgeous guy with an insecure woman.

1 ( +5 / -4 )

“If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair.”

This just comes with the territory of being good looking and/or popular. Casually shrug off their concerns and change the subject. ESPECIALLY if you are, in fact, having an affair.....or two....or five. ^_^

The number 1 complaint among male employees regarding female coworkers is the latter’s alleged tendency to beg >off working overtime for personal reasons, whether a date or housework piling up at home.

Men are more willing to make quality-of-life sacrifices in favor of their employment. This willingness to provide additional labor is priced into the general compensation levels for men. I bet the same women who go home early are quick to complain about the male/female pay gap.

There’s a solution to all this, says relationship consultant Mayumi Nimatsu, and it turns out to be the obvious one: >frank and open dialogue.

This x1000. On those rare occasions when I have a dispute/argument with a female I care about, I don't let them leave or go to sleep until we've talked through the issue. Sometimes takes several exhausting hours, but is totally worth it for building/maintaining strong relationships.

@cleo

Or maybe just stayed at home in the kitchen where she belongs?

If they stayed home in the kitchen, maybe men and children could have healthier organic/paleo meals, giving them more energy to be productive? Trying to consume 4,000+ calories, heavy on lean proteins, can be difficult without a second party planning/preparing your meals.

-1 ( +4 / -5 )

most definitely, huh? That's interesting.....

Noble - It's actually easier to consume 4,000 calories (which is way too much, unless you're very, very active!) if you're busy and eating on the run with no one to nag you about your intake - lots of fast food, junk food, fats, sugars, processed rubbish, full of calories and not much else. I think I would wilt away on a paleo diet, though - no dairy, no grains, no beans, no alcohol. No thanks! Who wants to live without toasted cheese butties?

-4 ( +5 / -9 )

Ihoko Kurokawa. In an evidently over-simplified but useful nutshell, the brain has two hemispheres; right: art, imagination, intuition; left: logic, science, math. The two hemispheres, Kurokawa explains, are better connected in women than in men, which helps account for women’s emotional response to things men scarcely notice.

This has been proven to be controversial at best and utter nonsense at the worst.

http://www.npr.org/sections/13.7/2013/12/02/248089436/the-truth-about-the-left-brain-right-brain-relationship

Emotional things men scarecely notice...Eh? Notice it all the time brah. That's called being empathetic and sharing/communicating.

2 ( +4 / -2 )

I am very happy that the career women in my office leave on time in general, it makes me feel more comfortable when I run out 30 seconds after the bell.

3 ( +4 / -1 )

Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of... discipline as necessary

If the discipline is dispensed by a wife wearing leather and brandishing a whip then I am all for it.

However, if it means nagging, moaning, sulking, the silent treatment, etc... then sorry ladies, your "discipline" won't work.

In fact, it will probably be counterproductive.

Unfortunately it seems that 99.9% of women are only able to apply nagging, sulking, etc.

I don't know if that is through lack of imagination, brainwashing by women's magazines or just plain meanness but anyway...

If only more of them would brandish an actual whip to lash the husband instead of giving a verbal lashing, many marriages would be much happier IMHO...

5 ( +8 / -3 )

"Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied; she makes like she’s the only one whose working!” If a stay at home husband/wife complains about help with the housework, they are just being lazy. If both people work, housework should be split proportionally... Yes both people live in the house but if one of them isn't helping pay the bills they should be doing the housework. Gotta be equal!

“And when I play with the kid, she doesn’t even consider that housework!” Playing with your child is not housework... it is your duty as a parent and you should be happy to do it. You only get to play with your kids when they are young. They grow up and those precious years are done.

1 ( +3 / -2 )

Totally gay gokai's complaint is about women who think that gay is just a confused state of mind, they are going to straighten you out, so to speak, and then you will fall in love with them. It has happened a couple of times, and it is irritating. I am not confused. And not that I'm cute or anything.

1 ( +3 / -2 )

If the discipline is dispensed by a wife wearing leather and brandishing a whip then I am all for it.

However, if it means nagging, moaning, sulking, the silent treatment, etc... then sorry ladies, your "discipline" won't work.

In fact, it will probably be counterproductive.

Whips don't work. The leather will probably get chewed. Nagging, moaning, sulking, the silent treatment, etc.... never works.

In fact, it is definitely counterproductive.

Oops, sorry I was on the puppy page. Same applies mutatis mutandis to men, though. Sugar always catches more flies than vinegar does.

Be nice to your man, ladies. And to your puppy too, of course.

-3 ( +5 / -8 )

"Men". Haha.

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

Whips don't work.

This suggests that you're not doing it properly.

Practice makes perfect!

Nagging, moaning, sulking, the silent treatment, etc.... never works.

OK... well... you used the word discipline... tell us how you "discipline" your man if it's not by nagging or moaning, etc.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

but instincts are instincts, genes are genes

Ridiculous statement. Genes have nothing to do with that. Social structure and patriarch mainly constructed the differences between men and women.

If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair.

The woman is crazy, better divorce/break up and leave this kind of psychopath with her misery.

but prudently keeps his mouth shut – in such cases

Yes it's better, we hear enough stupidity already.

which helps account for women’s emotional response to things men scarcely notice.

Ahh the usual women are over-emotional BS. They like it here.

but it’s not stupidity that keeps him in the dark, it’s the configuration of the male brain.

No, no, it's simply because she really didn't tell him why. Plain simple. No need for fanciful theories.

Men and women are different

The fallacy of the day...

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

scoobydoo; I agree that short skirts etc on an attractive woman are absolutely a positive thing. A beautiful intelligent woman - what a pleasure to work with.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life.

Remember men that ladies are sometimes called or referred to as "bitches" for a reason as well, the best 2 pieces of advice for dealing with them are.....

Rule Number One: The wife or "woman" is always right.

Rule Number Two: Even when she is wrong; refer to rule number one.

Women are like cats, nice to cuddle with, impossible to train, and are always ready with the "claws" to strike at any given moment. Keep them happy and they will be an asset for life!

1 ( +5 / -4 )

"The number 1 complaint among male employees regarding female coworkers is the latter’s alleged tendency to beg off working overtime"

Pffft! The men are dumb for working overtime all the time.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

What irritates men most about women

They never lift up the toilet seat. It gets filthy under there until a man tactfully leaves it up to show the mess. (Aren't we considerate?)

5 ( +6 / -1 )

Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life. and thats one of the most irritating things about women, thinking there man is property, scolded by its owner when its bad, given treats and patted when its good. But knows its place in the home and who the dominating owner is . Any yes man thats fine with that is just a cowering puppy and should be treated as such. A real relationship is of equals with no one partner being dominating, with mutual respect, love, devotion.

6 ( +8 / -2 )

Whips don't work.

This suggests that you're not doing it properly.

I said I was on the puppy page. What consenting (human) adults get up to in private is nobody's business but their own, but anyone taking a whip to a puppy is on a direct path to eternal hell.

Have to laugh at how huffy some folk are getting about the puppy comments. sexist? tail between the legs? barking orders? GTFOH!?? (language, please!) dominating owner? cowering? I suppose I could go through it line by line...but then again, them wot need it explained ain't gonna understand anyhoos. Suffice it to say that cowering puppies do not grow into good dogs any more than cowering men turn into good husbands.

Be gentle, be considerate, keep him satisfied, let him know what you need, and don't put up with any nonsense. What's wrong with that?

Women are like cats, nice to cuddle with, impossible to train, and are always ready with the "claws" to strike at any given moment.

My cat is trained to Come, Sit, High five, Turn around, Shake a paw, Fetch and use the toilet. She's also very nice to cuddle with and is a definite asset to my life. :-)

-8 ( +2 / -10 )

. . . . . . the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior

. . . . . . Why must I be like that, why must I chase the cat? Nothing but the dogg in me??

2 ( +4 / -2 )

Have to laugh at how huffy some folk are getting about the puppy comments. sexist?

This is funny.

Next time a woman complains about men being sexist, let's say she's being "huffy".

Women's double standards really make me laugh.

Call men "cute puppies" who need to be "disciplined" it's a light hearted joke... but if we call women "cute little bitches" who "need to be soundly spanked"... OMG it's so terrible...

Ladies, you're making us laugh...

3 ( +8 / -5 )

You're the one who brought out the whip, waru... I haven't suggested spanking anyone.

-9 ( +2 / -11 )

That the annoying ones don't know when to shut up.

8 ( +9 / -1 )

@Cleo

You're the one who said:

"men are like puppies"

who need to be treated

"with plenty of... discipline as necessary"...

In a similar way, is it OK for me to say something like:

"Women are like cute little bitches who need to be spanked..." ??

I think it's not OK for me to say that.

TBH, I have observed many women like you...

they think that "equality" means that they can say whatever ridiculous cr@p they want about men, with no comeback...

4 ( +10 / -6 )

No more talk of animals please.

@oyaji . . . . you're on fire. keep going.

they think that "equality" means that they can say whatever ridiculous cr@p they want about men, with no comeback...

Yup. Women can dish it out. (men take it) But, women can't take it when there's a comeback. Total nonsense and truly one-sided imo.

2 ( +7 / -5 )

That they think "I am offended" is any kind of argument for anything.

3 ( +4 / -1 )

That they think 'compromise' means I meet them half way, and then half way more, and then half way more...

6 ( +7 / -1 )

If a man is in the forest and he says something and there is no woman around to hear it, is he still wrong ?

10 ( +11 / -1 )

How anyone can diss Cleo - the most intelligent and eloquent poster on this site - is beyond me. You will never win!!

-5 ( +4 / -9 )

Women tend to be bigger sexists than men on an individual level, this is true. However, men continue to benefit from systemic pay and promotion sexism that endures from the past, so...whatever!

1 ( +4 / -3 )

Women tend to be bigger sexists than men on an individual level, this is true. However, men continue to benefit from systemic pay and promotion sexism that endures from the past, so...whatever!

How do you reconcile these two ideas?

Companies ship jobs over seas, employing different races instead of their own. Presumably they're not racist enough to keep jobs at home.

Companies pay and promote men over women for equal work. Presumably they're sexist enough to favor men, even when it hurts their bottom line.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Wow, go to bed, come back next morning to find I've been howled down, hounded off the thread even.....

Waru got the wrong end of the stick and started barking up the wrong tree (it's plenty of love, waru, and discipline as necessary, not plenty of discipline) and I was seriously shocked at how many got their teeth into the idea of domination and cowering submission. Not my intention at all, and I apologise for any unintended trauma caused.

Just be nice to people, people. And be nice to those the mod says must not be spoken of.

Now I will slink away and lick my wounds.

-5 ( +3 / -8 )

Consider yourself fortunate in having a partner who considers you attractive enough to worry that other women might take an interest in you.

Only a woman would consider it a good thing or an honor for a guy to have such an insecure partner.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

Getting suspicious if someone doesn't reply to a Line message quickly? I dated an insecure, childish waste of time like that in the past for a few months and that was more than enough. The only reason I stayed with her that long was her insistence on a an afternoon rendezvous before I went out with the boys to make sure I wasn't going out 'hungry'.

To be fair, I've also met men who are as bad. My female ex-coworker had to report back to her 'loving' partner pretty much on the hour when she was on a night out. With the use mobile phones, possessive types would be my worst nightmare.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

"If a man is in the forest and he says something and there is no woman around to hear it, is he still wrong ?" You betcha.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

Now I will slink away and lick my wounds. bit like the puppies that your likening us men too no doubt!?

0 ( +2 / -2 )

If any spouse insists they put line on their spouse's phone then they are wrong.

Get rid of your phone. If you need one for work, then tell work to get you one and pay for it.

If you want one for yourself, then only use it when you and your family are together. Leave it home until you get home.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

The word "man" comes from the longer word "wo-man" and we men were an after thought of nature. We men are secondary to the human species and not even necessary one day soon.

-2 ( +1 / -3 )

@Polar

No, "woman" is from the old English "wif" (female) plus "man"(human).

The old English for "male" was "wer", as in "werewolf".

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Luca, I sit corrected

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Agree about the "unnecessary" bit though : (

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Why would you make an article about the list then only show a few answers? I want to hear the top 10 results.

4 ( +4 / -0 )

This article is pretty low, even for JT's click-bait fare. In fact, I'd go so far as to say it's disgusting. Maybe JT should stay away from explaining society and just keep it to the no-frills crime beat.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

If one spouse works at a job, and the other spouse works taking care of the children and the home, then, I think it is unfair of the spouse who works at home to complain that the spouse who works away from home does not do enough housework. It is as if the spouse who works away from home complained that the one who works at home did not do enough work away from home.....it doesn't make sense.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

cleoOCT. 23, 2015 - 10:27AM JST Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied Don't help with the housework: do the housework. Different mindset. If I don’t immediately reply to her LINE message, she thinks I’m having an affair. Consider yourself fortunate in having a partner who considers you attractive enough to worry that other women might take an interest in you. the short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart Would you prefer your female work colleague wore a burka? Or maybe just stayed at home in the kitchen where she belongs? She suddenly gets angry and won’t tell me why! You did something to make her angry and didn't even realise what you were doing because your brain isn't connected up properly. Remember ladies, men are like puppies - cute and cuddly, and for life. They can also really mess things up if not properly trained, but react well to proper handling. Treat yours well but firmly, with plenty of love and discipline as necessary, and he/it will be an irreplacable asset to your life.

What a bunch of sexist dribble. Say this in a work place as a man about women and it will get you fired. This is what I hate about women, treating men like objects and animals, while we actually are equal and human beings.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

"Can men be blamed for being confused?" I felt so bad for the poor girls in Japan that just wanted to dress up and go out. I verbally had to stop old guys from harassing them on the streets and trains several occasions because I know if it were me I wouldn't like it one bit.

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

“If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!” That is the rule all around the world. You work for money, not for pleasing a-holes superiors or the company. Ant that the reason for contracts exist. To avoid exploitation

0 ( +0 / -0 )

My wife complains that I work too much. But I dont understand why as I never complain that she does too much housework.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Solution:

Make people accountable for their actions. Just because there isn't a physical harm done to someone, doesn't mean it doesn't trigger a response. If you wear tight skirts and wear nice perfume, then you should expect men to approach you, stare at you, daydream about you, whatever. It would be the equivalent of saying "well that dumb hungry mouse shouldn't have tried to take the cheese on the mouse trap." Sure, being able to control that urge and move on to other things would have been a better idea, but when you put EXACTLY what someone wants in front of them and then say "don't.... just don't" is ridiculous. ever try to put a toy in front of a kid and say "Don't play with this?" And before any feminists get their panties in a bunch, I did not just compare women to toys, I compared the reaction from the victim.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

If one spouse works at a job, and the other spouse works taking care of the children and the home, then, I think it is unfair of the spouse who works at home to complain that the spouse who works away from home does not do enough housework.

And if both work at a job? The way the article is worded would seem to suggest that scenario - she makes like she’s the only one whose (sic) working.

It would be the equivalent of saying "well that dumb hungry mouse shouldn't have tried to take the cheese on the mouse trap." ....... And before any feminists get their panties in a bunch, I did not just compare women to toys

I think you just compared men to mice.....? And dumb ones, at that.

when you put EXACTLY what someone wants in front of them and then say "don't.... just don't" is ridiculous.

Maybe they should shut down all those ridiculous shops with their ridiculous displays of things people want. If a shop has a pile of (e.g.) cupcakes it's trying to sell, is it ridiculous to expect the cupcakes not to be nibbled by any Tom, Dick or Taro who happens to walk past?

-1 ( +1 / -2 )

@ Cleo

Nice Quote mining there. To end the quote you cut off at "toys" : I did not just compare women to toys, I compared the reaction from the victim. So yes, I compared men to stupid mice when exposed to attractive women. why is this any surprise? Nearly all straight men have no problem admitting they get at least a little stupid around a hottie. This is exactly why women do what they do, BUT DONT LOOK OR YOU ARE A MISOGYNIST!

Cupcakes are put in displays for the EXACT same reason. The people who cant control themselves will buy them. The people who might want one would stop and consider if it is necessary. The people who don't like shitty food will move on. To put it in exact comparison: The people who cant control themselves because Genetics pushes men to attractive, nice smelling women will approach them, possibly in a non-flattering way. The men who might have an interest but a bit more self control might approach in a civil way. If its a feminist, men who cant get attention anywhere else will side with them in hopes to gain their favor.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Nice Quote mining there.

I wasn't 'quote mining' at all. I was interested to see what reaction your 'men are like dumb mice' analogy would get you; I got hug, drawn and quartered for comparing men to sweet little puppies (seems there's a sizeable percentage of the JT population who think the normal way to treat puppies is to put the fear of god into them and have them permanently cowering with their tails between their legs. The mind boggles at what they'd imagine should happen to a rogue rodent).

Cupcakes are put in displays for the EXACT same reason. The people who cant control themselves will buy them.

The cupcakes are not on display for anyone with an appetite and no willpower to come along and munch on. Social rules tell us that if we want a cupcake we have to go through the generally-accepted protocol - go into the shop, place your order, pay the money, walk out with your purchase. People who can't control themselves get pinched for shoplifting. So I agree with you, it's exactly the same; don't touch the cupcake display, don't touch the nice-looking, nice-smelling lady without her permission.

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

There’s a solution to all this, says relationship consultant Mayumi Nimatsu, and it turns out to be the obvious one: frank and open dialogue.

This is wrong. Two can constructively communicate. But once the guys are open and frank (and what he's saying, she doesn't want to hear) the dialogue goes south in an instant. When guys r honest, most of the time women don't dig what we say. This is why we often omit details.

It's NFL season right now . . . . the time when women love to press our buttons during half times or the 4th quarters every Sunday. If you're lucky- every other Sunday. Luckier, maybe just MNF.

-4 ( +2 / -6 )

I got hug, drawn and quartered for comparing men to sweet little puppies 

Nice Freudian slip. :-)

Ooookkkkk... we'll give you a big huggy-wuggy to show there's no hard feelings...

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Most of the article seemed to be guys already firmly established in their "black business suit/black tie/white shirt while working casual overtime" ruts complaining about women who had the audacity not to play the sarariiman clone game. It just sounds like they're jealous that the women might actually have a life beyond the work cubicle.

The one complaint that DID ring true was the one about women feeling strongly enough about something to get them noticeably mad, but apparently the reason is so petty that they are embarrassed to actually put it into words and instead rely on the "You know what you did!" dodge, instantly transforming men into some sort of omniscient mind-reader gender. My response when presented with that is typically along the lines of, "If you can't say what it is I did, then I didn't do it. End of discussion." That usually ends her silly game and she then tells me why she's upset - if only to prove to me that I DID do it.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Nice Freudian slip. :-)

lol. aka a typo, but you could be right. Have a cupcake. :-)

0 ( +0 / -0 )

“If you insist on working fixed hours and quitting at quitting time, don’t work full-time – get a part-time job!” I think we need to see how the things there are. If to work extra hours is part of a no written contract, he is right, this job is not for her; but if you can chose to avoid the extra hours as a valid option on the basis that you won’t receive neither the same the ones do work extra hours, it could be balanced.

“Power harassment! Sex harassment!” Just the existence of these words show that the laws have gone crazy. Only really serious things should be seen in that way, and these things are so serious and clear that we don’t need the existence of these expressions to attend them.

"short skirts, tight sweaters and sexy perfume that seems to encourage precisely the behavior that regulations against sexual harassment are meant to thwart" I’m partially agree. While is true that it is not enough reason to assault a female, there should exist disciplinary measures inside an office to promote people focus in their work. In other hand as it is true that is not correct for example to touch a female only because she is showing too much, it is true too that we neither should take it like something really serious in the case were to happen.

“Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied; she makes like she’s the only one whose working!” It depends much on the particular marriage; I have a near experience where the wife works a partial time and they solved it in a particular way: They agree that duty of him is pay the bills even if she works, so the money that she gets is only for her personal use, but she have the duty of make all the housework without expect help from him.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

“Even if I help with the housework, she’s not satisfied; she makes like she’s the only one whose working!” This is why I think a wife should have clear since the beginning that she should work only if happens that she have enough time besides doing the housework.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

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