Photo: bee | © PIXTA
lifestyle

For love or for money? TV star’s views on marriage make waves in Japan

29 Comments
By grape Japan

On September 4, the Nippon TV variety show 世界の果てまでイッテQ! (Sekai no hate made itte kyu | Off you go to the ends of the earth) aired a special episode featuring the Japanese-Indonesian businesswoman, socialite, television personality and philanthropist Dewi Sukarno, widely known in Japan as デヴィ夫人 Devi fujin, or Madame Dewi. She was also the third wife of former Indonesian President Sukarno.

The show was set in Dubai and featured a "Girls' Night Out" with Madame Dewi and other personalities.

Madame Dewi's views on marriage

On the show, Madame Dewi, together with models 谷まり Maria Tani, 堀田茜 Akane Hotta and 箭内夢菜 Yumena Yanai, enjoy sightseeing in Dubai before heading to a restaurant to enjoy a sumptuous dinner.

During the meal, Hotta asks Madame Dewi the age-old question: "Which is more important, money or love?"

Taking it in stride, she replied with another question: "If you could choose between a man whom you loved with an annual income of 2 million yen (around $13,900 at today's rate) and a man whom you didn't love with an annual income of 20 billion yen (around $139 million), which one would it be?"

Many people are faced with the choice of "taking money or taking love" when it comes to marriage.

In response to Madame Dewi's question, the three models immediately answered, "Even if the man's income is low, it's better if you love each other."

Madame Dewi laughed and rejected their answers, jokingly calling them "all idiots." But then, with a serious expression on her face, she explained her own view of things:

(If your partner's income is low), no matter how much you love them, you will always be looking at other people's lifestyles, other people's houses, other people's clothes... (and) gradually, you will lose your love for him.

But if you marry a man who earns 20 billion yen, even if you don't have love (for him), you'll have respect (for him), you'll have trust (in him).

Then, gradually, love will blossom.

From 世界の果てまでイッテQ! (Nippon TV)

Madame Dewi says that her original life was not a wealthy one. When she was in high school, she even worked to feed her family.

At the age of 17, she got a job at an exclusive club where foreign celebrities gathered, and when she was 19, she met former President Sukarno, who later became her husband.

She has experienced both poverty and wealth, and tasted both the sweet and the sour sides of life, which is why she believes that "even if you don't love your partner, your respect for and trust in them will naturally develop."

After the program aired, Madame Dewi's comments became a hot topic of conversation on the Internet, and it made many people think about marriage. For example, some of the comments were:

"Realistically speaking, yes, it is true. Money makes people happy."

"When someone succeeds in earning that much money, I suppose you trust and respect them as human beings."

"My own parents said something similar, but when Madame Dewi says it, it's very convincing...."

Of course, there are those who will choose love over money, even after hearing what Madame Dewi said.

Each person has his/her/their own standards. It's one of life's choices and could be the path that leads to happiness for some people and not for others.

Read more stories from grape Japan.

-- Saudi Arabia’s katsu sandwiches with no katsu have Japanese netizens mystified

-- Diablo Immortal collabs with BK Japan on diabolically garlicky and cheesy burger

-- Japanese basketball player Monica Okoye reveals racial discrimination

© grape Japan

©2022 GPlusMedia Inc.

29 Comments
Login to comment

For all those foreigners married in Japan, it adds a new layer to the "Charisma Man" series. I was told by a friend that a lot of the young women who attend their Senmon Gakko want to learn English to get a service job like hotels, tourism, and airlines to find a rich foreign husband. They are not all pretty enough to work in a hostess club like Madame Dewi.

To be fair, the Indonesian President was a collector. He probably had very little love for her, too. I would bet he loved his previous Indonesian partners more. Madame Dewi was a means to an end.

If women want to marry strictly because of money then men should be allowed to get a pre-nup or get a family trust with very little resistance from these women.

Let's see how their love blossoms!

15 ( +19 / -4 )

If people are seriously taking advice from Devi about marriage and love then their problems are much more serious than not knowing who to marry. This is like taking business advice from someone that lives well because he won the lottery.

14 ( +18 / -4 )

Marriage is for love only. The rest is prostitution.

3 ( +7 / -4 )

I had to google that name, Madame Dewi.

Some celebrities or “talento” make shows interesting or grab your attention, to make you want to sit through whatever show they are on. And that’s fine.

some celebrities or “talento” make you cringe or want to immediately change the channel or pretty much turn the TV off.

she’s definitely a channel changer.

On the other hand,

In response to Madame Dewi's question, the three models immediately answered, "Even if the man's income is low, it's better if you love each other."

this is also garbage, come on now, we all know the reality.

Madame Dewi laughed and rejected their answers, jokingly calling them "all idiots." 

great programming guys.

5 ( +6 / -1 )

She's been shilling that stuff for years and a lot of young girls definitely feel that way anyway. At least she's honestly saying she's a golddigger.

But if you marry a man who earns 20 billion yen, even if you don't have love (for him), you'll have respect (for him), you'll have trust (in him).

> Then, gradually, love will blossom.

There's a big difference between loving someone and being in love with them and money is not what makes you trust or respect someone. Obviously, to her any excuse for loving the guy's money will do. With age comes wisdom. Sometimes.

7 ( +8 / -1 )

some celebrities or “talento” make you cringe or want to immediately change the channel or pretty much turn the TV off.

Ariyoshi, Nakai Masahiro. I only turn on the jtv a few times a month but I'm lucky if I don't see one of these clowns.

As for 世界の果てまでイッテQ!, it was great before the corona, they were always travelling to many different countries showing crazy stuff, now its just the old boring japanese slapstick comedy, unwatchable!

5 ( +5 / -0 )

Gents, another reason to stay single and enjoy your life.

6 ( +9 / -3 )

To have respect for Sukarno who has ALOT of blood on his hands just about says it all in respect to dewi comments....

5 ( +6 / -1 )

Would you still respect your rich husband if they didn't give you a credit card? Starting to see lots of rich celebrities and business man divorcing their partners, guess money doesn't buy love after all?

7 ( +8 / -1 )

Remind me , didnt The Buddha say "desire is the cause of suffering "?

Marry for love people, the best things in life are free anyway .

4 ( +6 / -2 )

Asking a mother golddigger about marriage for love or money, would anyone really expect a different answer?

10 ( +10 / -0 )

Without love all you'll ever have is buyer's remorse.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

Japanese tv always setting a new low bar; not only it’s dull and uninteresting (with all its oishiis, sugois, kawaiis and the sole purpose of making people jealous of the lifestyle of the rich and famous), it also tells young girls to sell their hearts and bodies for money; it’s ugly, it’s depressing and it’s a giant piece of garbage.

14 ( +15 / -1 )

I mean as interesting as Devi is she’s not a role model for marriage. An underage hostess marrying a “probably “ despot leader almost 40 years older than her saying “love will come after you meet a powerful dude and leech off him awhile” is fairly dubious advice imo.

smart, sure, but dubious none the less.

She’s been riding the coattails of her once marriage to this guy for 50+ years now. She’s a hustler and I guess I respect that aspect of her haha

but I’ll be getting my relationship advice from anyone else. Also why can’t the wife be the one making more? Wake up japan it’s not the 1800s

10 ( +12 / -2 )

Also why can’t the wife be the one making more? Wake up japan it’s not the 1800s

Hallelujah! AMEN!

6 ( +8 / -2 )

You cannot marry for just Love nor Money alone.

Love plus a man with reasonable financial position would be ideal as with Love alone and low income would be a hard tough life. Who wants that?

I am a male who has seen real low level poverty during my younger years and it's not easy life. I studied and also worked multiple jobs to make ends meet and am where I am through hard work.

Ladies, take time to make your choices.

-5 ( +1 / -6 )

Let this be a clear warning to men or women who fetishize a particular of race (Japanese, Korean, etc.)

1 ( +3 / -2 )

It is a a stupid question. Firstly there are hundreds of more likely outcomes other than either a loved-up life in poverty or a loveless relationship with great riches. Secondly, it is assuming women have no earning potential or aspirations to become anything but a housewife / trophy wife.

3 ( +5 / -2 )

Love or money? In Japan it’s convenience or duty?

1 ( +1 / -0 )

She married for money, and now she is trying to justify her entire career which basically revolves around that one fact. pathetic.

7 ( +8 / -1 )

Apparently Dewi was set up with Sukarno by Yoshio Kodama. She was 19 and he was 58. A marriage for political reasons rather than love or even money I believe.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

Relationships with big disparities (age, wealth, religion) can be difficult to sustain. I wouldn't rule out a potential partner for being poor. Or for engaging in sex work in the past. I would rule them out for addictions: gambling, drugs and alcohol. Especially smoking as I really dislike the smell.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

Imho, if you are young and trying to decide how to choose a partner, love is most important. Also, work ethic. If someone is willing to work hard, even if they start out poor, eventually they will get a decent job- not saying it's the secret to being rich, but will lead to an ok life. Even if a person is born rich, if they aren't willing to work hard, they most likely will lose their money. And if someone is willing to work hard, they may understand it's important to work hard in the relationship in terms of communication and figuring out problems etc. Not that a relationship should be hard work, but that a willingness to work hard at something even if it's tricky will teach a skill set that is valuable in a relationship. Just my 2 cents.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Personally I don't think it was love or money. Devi simply had money and what does money do, it buy you things that you want or desire, if I am correct the guy was married three times so he traded his wives in like used cars. Money was not the object, love was not the quest, was it sex I don't think so the guy just simply had money which a lot of people do not have so he was able to buy what he wanted and get rid of it when he had no more desire for it. It like a women buying a beautiful dress she wears it several times and puts in the closet until she finds another one she like.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

In response to Madame Dewi's question, the three models immediately answered, "Even if the man's income is low, it's better if you love each other."

Madame Dewi laughed and rejected their answers, jokingly calling them "all idiots."

At least one of them was telling the truth!

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

Let's see what she has to say when she receives okozukai 3 man en per month and nothing more from her rich husband.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Yep. The 3rd wife married for money.

That's the way I see it.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

This is a clear example of what you should not do. Marrying a moneybag makes you dependent on that person and money does not bring happiness. The dependence can lead to neglect and abuse later on as well. And being a third wife, you have to wonder why the first two marriages didn't pan out.

In America we have these idiotic Bachelor/Bachelorette reality TV shows. The prefab marriages usually don't last and the TV shows are such a moronic waste of time. I don't bother watching such trash. Some people will do anything for their Warholian Famous Fifteen Minutes.

Tom SanSep. 13  01:11 pm JST

Yep. The 3rd wife married for money.

That's the way I see it.

A then-teenager from then-Yugoslavia was smuggled out of there and married a filthy rich pompous bag of money (and other things). She became his third wife, and finally a US citizen in 2006. Melania sold her soul to the 'Donald', and money. There is NO TRUE LOVE in the Trump family at all.

And just what makes this TV star an expert on marriage or love anyway?

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Yeah, well, some women (and men, for that matter) are gold diggers, and women like Dewi Sakarno and Melania Trump are like their godmothers, LOL.... :)

I'll say one thing: she must have some interesting stories.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Login to leave a comment

Facebook users

Use your Facebook account to login or register with JapanToday. By doing so, you will also receive an email inviting you to receive our news alerts.

Facebook Connect

Login with your JapanToday account

User registration

Articles, Offers & Useful Resources

A mix of what's trending on our other sites