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One third of single Japanese men surveyed say they prefer an older lover

28 Comments
By Rona Moon

From Dec 6-9 of this year, Japanese Facebook dating app Match Alarm quizzed 2,944 singles in their 20s and 30s about their dating habits. They were asked to identify if they prefer to date someone of the same age, older or younger.

A resounding 81.3% of women replied that they would rather be with a silver fox than a younger stud. And one in three men said they preferred an older lover.

Think about it. Of course, an older lover tends to have plenty more tricks (and probably money) up their sleeve, a lot more emotional maturity, and maybe even a decent job, a car or an apartment. Less prone to wild accusations and intense jealousy, more prone to intense orgasms, the older lover comes with many benefits. You might find the odd youngster who knows what they want, and happens to be a mature forty-year-old in a tween’s body, but these are few and far between. More commonly, the idealized younger lover will be twerking to Miley and pouting and sulking when they don’t get their way.

Breaking it down by age group, more than half of 20- to 24-year-old men preferred an older lover to impress their friends with. An older lover to rope them in and show them the ropes. Unfortunately for them, not too many 25- to 34-year-old women returned their affection, but about one in three 35- to 39-year-old women might go for a younger-man liaison.

When one Fukuoka man in his late 20s was asked why he would rather be with a mature lover, he replied, “I want someone who’ll gently comfort me when I get lonely.” Don’t we all? Hug me, squeeze me, love me! Another man from Tokyo in his early 20s said, “When I’m with [an older lover], I feel calm and secure.” Many men extolled the infinite virtues that only “the older lover” possesses.

By contrast, the single women in Japan overwhelmingly preferred older men as lovers. Could it be financial security, experience, confidence, or women’s social conditioning? In successively older male and female age brackets, the popularity of older lovers seems to fall. Still, older men take hope — younger single women seem to prefer an older man at least half the time, and probably more than half.

On the other hand, some women do prefer a younger man. One Tokyoite in her early 20s said that younger men have a generally more forgiving nature. An Osaka woman in her early 30s commented that younger men could be trained, and were more tolerant. I guess you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but young dogs are keen to learn.

Finally, it’s worthwhile remembering that these things are highly arbitrary. I used to think I preferred older men. Why? Because I thought that if my lover was the same age as me, he’d be more likely to leave me for a younger woman at some stage down the track. Instead of suffering the pain of being replaced with a “newer model”, I thought it might be nicer to be that younger woman myself. Not that I’d ever want anyone to break up on my account, but all the same, better safe than sorry. Anyway, this was a purely hypothetical situation which never came to pass, and now I couldn’t be happier with my fresh-faced boytoy.

Age is only a number, so it’s best not to attach too much importance to it. We’re all individuals, not statistics, so whoever legally floats your boat, I say go for it! Older, younger, or the same age: we can all have mutually satisfying relationships.

Source: MyNavi News

Read more stories from RocketNews24. -- Fashion for the young at heart -- How to be Popular with Japanese Girls in Seven Steps -- Recent Survey Suggests That Japan’s Older Generation’s Manners Stink

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©2022 GPlusMedia Inc.


28 Comments
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Weird article purporting to analyze stats but with more-information-than-I-needed personal stuff at the end.

Growing up in liberal pc 80s 90s US, I always thought an age difference of more than 2 or 3 years was iffy and more than 5 really kimochi warui. (Of course a couple in their 30s or 40s would be "forgivable" up to 10 or so yrs).

This was all too much thinking, and not enough actual experience/ emotional honesty. Really any age difference is OK if the two ppl are able to give and get what they need, and have, or be approaching, happiness.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

Hot mature Japanese women... now that is my favorite demographic.

I don't want to sound cynical but when young Japanese women say they prefer older men I think they have shopping trips to Marui in mind.

15 ( +17 / -2 )

In today's climate of shaming males for the age of their dating partner, I am amazed this article was allowed to be printed.

Yes indeed, its the WOMEN even more behind older man/ younger woman couples. I guess the true grand delusion here is making believe this data does not apply to teen females, coupled with the insistence they have no dating desires that need addressing, despite the junior high school girl calling up a gang to pummel a boy who spurned her.

-5 ( +1 / -6 )

Men date older women for many reasons however one reason is probably because they desire to be with someone who could be like a mother figure for them. Maybe they never knew there mom growing up missed the personal bond. Some men enjoy mature females and older women are usually this way. Since they have been around longer, they have more experience about life and can teach them something new. They look for someone who has some head smarts. Most older women have completed their education and set aside some money for the future. Confidence is extremely attractive to the opposite sex. Older women know who they are and what they want out of life. Men pick up on it and enjoy being around a women who gives this off. Some men are looking for a women that is stable. A women of this nature has her own job and place to live. She is totally independent and many enjoy being around a female like this. Some men date older women because they think they are better in bed. They believe that older is more experienced in the bedroom. Many men like being taken care of. They date older women hoping she will have enough money in the bank to help out. Some women sadly enjoy this. They get a rise out of being the breadwinner in the relationship. These are some of the reasons men date older females. They like being around women who exude security, confidence, and wisdom because this makes them feel better as men.

0 ( +6 / -6 )

The men prefer an older lover? Is that 'mommy syndrome'?

It's pretty easy to understand why Japanese women like older men. I know many young Japanese guys and they are immature idiots with their phones full of AKB photos and finely tuned manga hair

-4 ( +7 / -11 )

Ben Franklin wrote an essay about the merits of an older lover.

But I think these dudes just want a mommy.

-5 ( +4 / -9 )

Comforting to know J men would be interested in an older woman (well, 1/3 of them anyway) but quite honestly, I dont know many women in their 30s and 40s who would be willing to take on a younger man. I have had this conversation before. With many of my J women friends, it is about money. With many of my foreign women friends, it is about these young J pups being so flaming annoying! You can trail a man-cub around for a while but ultimately they are too needy and hard work. On the other hand, older J men have egos that need careful handling. Sigh..... what to do?! Find the exception to the rule, the diamond in the rough, I guess. Happy hunting to all singles!

2 ( +2 / -0 )

There is a couple who live in the same cul de sac as me with a twenty year age gap. They seem very happy but the woman gets annoyed with some locals presuming she is her husbands mother.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

Well, given the fine shape of women in the 30's, 40's and 50's in Japan, I'm not surprised at all.

6 ( +7 / -1 )

Some of the female staff in their twenties in my office have the tastes, manner of speech and independence of a 12 year-old. Dating these women would make me feel like a pedophile. I can fully understand this.

6 ( +6 / -0 )

Like the writer says, 'age is only a number'. The magic ingredient in any relationship is a heartfelt desire to be with the other person, which is the result of mutual interests and respect.

3 ( +3 / -0 )

...and almost 50% of the Japanese men prefer a younger female. So?

2 ( +2 / -0 )

Older women tend to be more realistic with expectations and they are easier to communicate with on any subject, but they have more set values and might not be flexable. The younger women in Japan tend to play alot more games, and as you get to know them, most are clueless in the meaning of maturiity and responsibilty. Compare to the women in the West, many women in Japan are inmature at 20-25 years old.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

2,944 is not a representative sample. The surveyers could have simply been looking for respondents that fit their agenda. Not good science.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Regardless of preferences romantic love is the most important experience a person can have.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Ben Franklin wrote an essay about the merits of an older lover.

I hope he declared a conflict of interest in that paper.

Anyway, the data would change with the question: steady dating vs. fling. Women tend go older for the former and younger for the latter. Men tend to go younger for both.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Ebisu and Ginza, has many nice, mature and $$ J ladies, me thinks!

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Erm, ok. And this is considered news because?

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Trend of shifting from mangaish kogals to "chi teki" (intelligent) women?

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Younger than me please. older would be, well, a bit too old.....

0 ( +0 / -0 )

One third of single Japanese men surveyed say they prefer an older lover

Which means, according to what my second grade elementary school said, that two thirds don't.

2,944 is not a representative sample. The surveyers could have simply been looking for respondents that fit their agenda. Not good science.

True.

The younger women in Japan tend to play alot more games, and as you get to know them, most are clueless in the meaning of maturiity and responsibilty. Compare to the women in the West, many women in Japan are inmature at 20-25 years old.

I've found the complete opposite. A lot of Japanese women pretend to be flippant when they are not. As for Western women, you have to be kidding.

1 ( +3 / -2 )

In Asia, I prefer the older girls; less of that squeaky hamster voice they all do, and less pretending to be pre-pubescent. You can also have a decent conversation with them which is of utmost importance.

0 ( +2 / -2 )

"I prefer the older girls; less of that squeaky hamster voice they all do, and less pretending to be pre-pubescent."

Result of hundreds of years of natural selection.

"You can also have a decent conversation with them which is of utmost importance."

Probably will be labelled as argumentative.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

A nation of herbivorous mummy's boys.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Disillusioned, sushi, RTFA. It says only 33% of men prefer older women. The majority prefer younger.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

I like 16 years younger because it means she is a woman who values heart and maturity more than sex appeal . But don't try this until you are at least 34 or you may end up in jail.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

"I prefer the older girls; less of that squeaky hamster voice they all do, and less pretending to be pre-pubescent."

"Result of hundreds of years of natural selection."

Male-dominated society was invented around 4,000 years ago in areas between Yellow river and Yangtze river, in China. Later Toraijin brought it with them into Japan during Spring and Autumn period, and later Three Kingdoms periods, around 770 BC~280 AD. Since then bluffing, predatory males tend to prefer simpleminded women to able, sophisticated, intelligent ones.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

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