lifestyle

Things Japanese girls do that make guys go, 'Huh?'

167 Comments

Goo Ranking (http://ranking.goo.ne.jp) recently conducted a survey of 493 Japanese guys on what sort of habits by Japanese women baffle them. Here are some of the results.

  1. They want to lose weight when they don’t need to.

  2. When one says, “Kawaii!” all the others follow.

  3. They go to the bathroom in groups.

  4. Even though they say “I’ll leave it up to you,” they complain about your choice.

  5. They spend a really long time shopping.

  6. They shave their eyebrows just to draw them back on again.

  7. They wear makeup every day.

  8. They won’t directly say what they’re thinking.

  9. They’re obsessed with fortune-telling.

  10. They have a separate stomach just for dessert.
© Metropolis magazine (www.metropolis.co.jp)

©2024 GPlusMedia Inc.

167 Comments
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The main thing that sticks out for me as particularly 'Japanese' is number 9. So many of my Japanese girl friends are really into 'power spots' and soothsayers and stuff. Also, the eyebrows. I had to hold back a scream when I first saw one of my friends with a clean face! She's stopped doing it to that level now, though (thank goodness).

4 and 8 are just plain annoying!!

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Don't women do that everywhere?

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I don't see much difference here from American girls, they are the same the world over.

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Just to name a few: belching, spitting, flatulating, and screaming in public. Glad I could help.

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The things men do that make any woman go huh, is having the manners of a common barnyard animal, which most men do Ikkochan...and may I know what are "the manners of a common barnyard animal" so at least i could try to educate myself a little bit.

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HonestDicator, how do you press an opinion out of them?

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A lot of those apply to women around the world. Anyways, I've been lucky to have never experienced #4. I know how to press an opinion out of them. All about proper communication in a relationship.

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The things men do that make any woman go huh, is having the manners of a common barnyard animal, which most men do.

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that’s very much the same with any other girl from any other culture... i guess we all human after all.... hah!

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"Thick and lush" eyebrows, that's how they were when I first came to Japan 18 years ago (Yes, I know: time to leave). Women looked like they had caterpillars on their foreheads. I welcomed the plucking at first, but it's gone too far. Wash their faces and most women now have punctuation marks where they ought to have eyebrows.

Eyebrows aren't the only things that are being plucked. 18 years ago, a lot was different, everything was natural. Now everything is being plucked, waxed, shaved, trimmed, dyed... yep, a real shame. I yearn for the good old days.

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ACrowe: moderation in everything, I guess. By the way, I distinctly remember seeing women in skirts and stockings with unshaved legs. The horror.

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lovejapan21, why not trimming with the little scissors and only plucking where there shouldn't be any hair? Works for me ;)

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"Thick and lush" eyebrows, that's how they were when I first came to Japan 18 years ago (Yes, I know: time to leave). Women looked like they had caterpillars on their foreheads. I welcomed the plucking at first, but it's gone too far. Wash their faces and most women now have punctuation marks where they ought to have eyebrows.

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I could not really be seen as much of a catch

@limboinjapan Thanks for your honesty

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ukguyjp, i hated that at first, but to think about it, hey its not a bad idea at all. I do it too now. So much easier ;)

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thanks for that mental image zenobia!!

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eyebrows: they shouldn't pluck them so much as they won't grow back when they get older. In some cultures women have their eyebrows shaved when they're little so when they're adults, their eyebrows will be thick and lush.

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don't want J chicks, I could write a 10 reasons why...ha.

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Kanu: Yep! Totally right. I think sometimes what happens is the man and woman are knowledgeable about different things but the guy ends up talking about what he knows about or is interested in and the woman is really not interested so feigns interest instead by saying--eeee?! And unfortunately there are still quite a few guys out there who don't like it when they think a woman is smarter than them. So girls are socialized to pretend they are not as smart as they are in order to get guys to like them.

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1,4,5,8,9 are bery much my wife. 2,5,10 are my girlfriend. she is easier than my wife.

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If you have been dating a Japanese woman and she doesn't want to see you any more, she will simply ignore your emails and cut off all contact, rather than do the decent thing and tell you she's rather not meet again. YOU'RE LEFT HIGH AND DRY AND WONDERING WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON!

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Girl with dog: Get a life!!

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I think the one who posted that haven.t any friends because almost girls (foreigners or japanese) do that!

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limbo - The thing is, if your friend can't get/keep a boyfriend because they can't/won't cope with something that is a central part of her life, surely it's as well for her to find out sooner rather than later, and say goodbye to the jerk? When she comes across the man who understands her need to care for an animal that has been part of her life for more than half the time she has been breathing, a man who doesn't throw a wobbly when she needs to give priority to dog care over dating, then she'll have found Mr Right. Our boss dog is 18 years old, was never yappy but has taken to barking at odd hours recently due to what we think is dementia or at least senile confusion, is sometimes incontinent and cannot be left alone for any length of time. We don't buy her clothes or accessories, but we do see to it that she is always warm, comfortable, safe and well-fed. That little dog helped me raise my kids into the caring people they are, and she has earned every little comfort she now gets. Your friend's little dog was with her all through her teen years and early adulthood. What kind of person would she be if she dumped the dog now that it's old and withered in order to date some jerk with no understanding of loyalty and compassion? Would you prefer she dumped the dog at the pound to stop it interfering with her dating schedule? That, I think, is when there would be something dreadfully wrong going on.

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@cleo:"I definitely don't see the point in worrying that a man who doesn't like dogs might not like me. We would have nothing in common."

I would think you of all people here on JT would not parse someone's words, I highly doubt the point was not liking dogs but more to the point of the way they act towards others and how they treat (spoil) that dog to the point of nauseam.

I have a friend in her mid 30's that has a little yappy thing nearly 20 years old barks non stop, bites and is incontinent, she lives at home with her parents buys clothing and accessories for the thing all the time and even has her parents get a sitter for the thing because it is so old it can't be left alone, and then she calls me up to complain and ask WHY her boyfriends keep bumping her!!!

I love dogs can't say the same about cats but a dog is a dog, not a child or even an adult companion and when the dogs needs are more of a priority then that of your boyfriend/Husband then their is something dreadfully wrong!

And that is definitely a "Huh?" moment!

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most women DO do that, its from fear that a man wont like them

I never saw the point in worrying that a dumb man might not like me. Or that a man who wanted me to be dumb might not like me.

having pictures of dogs as their sns profile pic

Oops, guilty as charged. It isn't necessarily something only Japanese women do.

I definitely don't see the point in worrying that a man who doesn't like dogs might not like me. We would have nothing in common.

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-_- All these comments are made by men, I AS A WOMEN refuse to "dumb myself down" and honestly, most women DO do that, its from fear that a man wont like them, but its not much different from men pretending to be smart to impress women. So, the train stops at BOTH stations, a lot of women are tought thats the proper behavior to get a man. Its really not okay, and most mothers will nag thier daughters, "Men like quiet and seemingly stupid women." Its highly juvinile.

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@bicultural; you know I am right.

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Potida: "Women are just smart enough to fake dumbness. It works with men, especially in Japan. It's about meeting expectations, as someone here rightly mentioned."

I beg to differ on that statement, I am an older man well in his 40's a single father of 2 teenagers with a struggling business so I teach privately mostly French and some English as well as Cooking to help make ends meet so I could not really be seen as much of a catch and I don't see why any Japanese woman would feel the need to dumb herself down to me.

All my students are University graduates and all form top Japanese universities, most graduated with business degrees so you would expect that the women would be the upper end of the scale when it comes to intelligence, commonsense and world/business affairs.

But I am constantly amazed and shocked at how little they know compared to the men, ask them about world affairs or even about their own business and they are dumbfounded to answer, those taking French are able to tell you just about every store of attraction there is and how they love the French (meaning France ) lifestyle but really know nothing about it say for Paris and maybe a few larger cities and even then mostly what Japanese magazines tell them, ask them what they think about the recent strikes and riots in France and they look at you with as @Judderman put it " the head tilted to one side with a blank expression on their face while their big brown eyes with look up at you,eyelashes fluttering..." and haven't even a clue what you are talking about.

And as I mentioned these are well educated women not your young Junior college or high school graduates.

No this definitely makes me go 'Huh?'

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I am surprised no one has mentioned talking about dogs, dressing up dogs, eating at restaurants with dogs at the table, talking to dogs, walking dogs in baby prams, showing everyone photos of dogs, having pictures of dogs as their sns profile pic, paying lots of money on dog hair cuts, shopping for dogs and rejecting guys because they need to spend time with their sick dogs.....blah blah blah blah blah.

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Women are just smart enough to fake dumbness. It works with men, especially in Japan. It's about meeting expectations, as someone here rightly mentioned.

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In general they are just dumber than their average "girl that lives in a developed nation" Western counterpart.

Just as I predicted.

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There definitely is a deliberate effort to come across as being ditzy,cute,childishly innocent..whatever you want to call it.if they are genuinely intelligent maybe they dont want to show up the guy by being smarter than him.sometimes when you say something that they dont understand they give you a look that my red setter gives me when he doesnt understand a command: the head tilted to one side with a blank expression on their face while their big brown eyes with look up at you,eyelashes fluttering...

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@combinibento;@fishy;@m5c32:

Actually not to defend the word "dumber" but they are definitely less mature and I will back that up by the fact that places like Tokyo Disneyland caters mainly to 20 and 30 something women and they can be some of the dumbest women ( Not girls but women) I have ever seen, when my son was quite young (3 or 4)I saw 4 mid to late 20's Japanese women literally run him over so they could get to Goofy before him and have their picture taken and again recently on an unfortunately forced trip back there, I saw several similar instances.

Japanese women and lets use the correct term "Women" they are no longer "girls" are some of the few women in the world that even in their mid 30's still try and pretend they are cutesy, cutesy.

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Guys, chill out. I said "in general." The topic is: things Japanese girls do that make you go "huh?" And my opinion is simply that there are a large percentage - maybe not a majority but certainly a larger percentage than in the West - of women in Japan that do not assert themselves or take pride in being intelligent or professionally successful. Yes, I used the word "dumber." Sorry, poor choice of words. I think m5c32 said it better.

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In general they are just dumber than their average "girl that lives in a developed nation" Western counterpart.

Sometimes I don't JT's rules of conduct. How this comment is allowed to stand and sometimes other comments that are to the point, but with less vitriol are erased. Talk about unfair.

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In general they are just dumber than their average "girl that lives in a developed nation" Western counterpart.

I think that's more about projection and expectations meeting up. That is to say some people feel as though a certain facade is expected and thus act it out. but I think those are in the minority. Most college educated seem ok with asserting themselves.

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combini - that's some arrogant comment there..

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In general they are just dumber than their average "girl that lives in a developed nation" Western counterpart.

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My wife insists on plucking my eyebrows! After a six year stay in the UK, thankfully she's still Japanese.

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then it is very possibly a test of your loyalty and sensitivity to her and >her feelings. If she compliments you on your choice then you made her feel >loved and you appear considerate.. if she complains about your choice.. you failed.

Ah, yes, the venerable 'sh*t test'. 'Do these pants make my butt look fat?' 'You decide' etc. Unfair to expect a person to have ESP and satisfy your every whim.

we got to the restroom in groups to talk about how stupid we think men are.

Charming.

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Even though they say “I’ll leave it up to you,” they complain about your choice.

((chuckle))

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If Japanese women travels or stays long term in foreign country, they are exposed to looking at life differently and this is refreshing for alot of women. In Japan, I believe the system has collective entitiy. Even though the peception of Japan has changed drastically, still, the Japanese women are part of traditional singular system that changes very slowly. Compare to west, Japan society is still difficult for women to speak her mind, regardless of right or wrong, and doesn't matter how smart you are. In order to survive in Japan, most of these women have to work and follow strict double standard corporate rules. Women have less options compare to west in terms of salary, promotion, and being equal to men. Like your wife, how many Japanese women's career continues with independent thinking? Not many. If you look at happy marriage in Japan, only one out of seven have respectful and caring marriage. It's not easy to have a good marriage in Japan. The odds are really against it.

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wow. as clueless as (my perception of) j-blokes are, that list was pretty on the ball.

I wanna read the next one, where j-gals complain about their douchebag male counterparts. a 'no holds barred' version would possibly be the JT read of the year..

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I readily admit to still being a student of life but I would like to think that I'm smart enough not to agree with generalizing of what Japanese or Women into a top ten list or with what some of the poster have stated in their comments. It would be like reading a poll or a "how do date" in Cosmo or FHM and believing it to be 100% factual, when in fact the articles are geared towards the lowest common denominator.

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With the exception of the fortune telling and the "kawaii!", this list applies to the U.S. (and probably most other industrialized countries) as well.

Number 4 needs to be underlined, bold-faced, and italicized. That's a biggie.

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who raised the bar? nice to see this level of discussion here, for a change. ;-D

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They feel free and they seek adventure in a very naive way. Most young Japanese women that study in the states are very easy and accomadating. If you treat them kind and with trust, they spread like eagle.

Perhaps I have dirty mind or there is a few freudian slips in your writing.

The comments here remind of gyaru magazine article my wife brought me home awhile ago, that profiled different types of foreigners and their "dateability". It was pure silliness and filled with just as many broad bush stereotypes.

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Still creeped out bye the eyebrow thing here...

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I have to laugh at this, most of my friends at home are almost like this, but we don't shave our eye brows, hell, I don't even pluck mine. J women AND latino women do that crap, frankly I can't see why, and another thing, I refuse to wear make up everyday, I dislike sweets, I love my body image (curvy but NOT fat 145lbs 5'8"), I loath shopping and malls, its useless to waste time beating about the bushes, im not conserned with fortunes even though astrolagy interests me, and we got to the restroom in groups to talk about how stupid we think men are. Honestly, its not that hard to figure out, not to mention when you ae peverted pchycopaths waiting to attack innocent women, we MUST travel in packs, its crusal.

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-Terrible in bed compared to their western counterparts -flap and flounder around like a bin-liner in the wind -fake crying all the time -no brains -no personalities -no hobbies -can not think outside the box -all turn in Obasan when married Basically, Japan can keep its women, thank you very much.

You must've gotten shafted pretty badly. I mean something fierce, man! Gotta admit, I do feel a lot of anger in that post! Pheeeeew.....

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Where do you live? How many Japanese do you know that have a weight problem??? Most Japanese women need to bulk up a bit on the top and definitely the bottom!!! Personally, I'll offer them another slice of Tiramisu!

Most western women need to cut down on their Tiramisu. "Bulk" and "lard" are two different things IMO. The latter is the one which I don't care much about.

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@seesaw

Tamarama: There's nothing special about your wife. Sorry to say that. J women are well known for knowing how to keep their men. It's all a big bowl of dramas.

Oh, dear me. Met my wife have you? Seen her in action through your magical internet portal, have you? Pffffft......

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They shave their eyebrows just to draw them back on again.

That is not only for J girl and I have to agree that is really odd and a turn away. It is sort of the 50-60s style. I have also seen people tattoo lips outline. Imagine after they have finished their meals and have their lips with outlined. That is really funny. Sort of make you stare not in a good way.

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change "Kawaii" for cute then all girls are like this no matter where they live!....i know i am one lol

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My wife is funny, very witty, a little kooky, worldly (she had lived in a couple of countries when I met her and has travelled through many others), has impeccable manners and a sense of social propriety when needed, is dedicated and hard working, kind to others and is from a great family. She is open minded and adventurous. She is, I guess, quite atypical and I am a lucky guy, but there are plenty of interesting women in Japan, you just have to find them.

Tamarama: There's nothing special about your wife. Sorry to say that. J women are well known for knowing how to keep their men. It's all a big bowl of dramas.

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I like Tamarama's post. I, too, am married to a Japanese woman. We are about to celebrate our 11th anniversary, and we have two wonderful children and an organic farm that we run together. In any relationship but perhaps especially dating/marriage, we all are going to do things that puzzle, irritate, disappoint, or even anger our partner. I don't need a poll to make it clear, though--my best strategy has been to follow the apostle Paul's words, Love washes over a multitude of sins.

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Tamarama: exactly, my friend.

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talking2U:"fortune telling is an opportunity. Roll with it and all the mystical nonsense, and you will be rewarded!"

That is if all you are interested is to trick your way into their bed, Sorry not my style!

This fortune telling and blood type added to what I wrote at 10:16 AM JST - 26th October and you have the answer why so many Japanese women find themselves in their mid 30's suddenly desperate to find a husband (read sperm donor) I won't even get in to the origins of the blood type thing and its present and past abuses.

Suffice to say I have never seen women so blinded by a fixed set of conditions in what they want their man to be to the point of rejecting anyone else and not even trying to look at other possibilities.

I will note that barring a few exceptions most Japanese men I know really don't have any fixed preconceived ideas of what they want in a woman all they care about is that she is nice, and that she will be a good wife and mother the rest they are willing to adapt to.

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I married a Japanese woman, and I have to say, she is a sensational person. I dated people from a few different places; Australian (several), Brazilian, Canadian, English, and I never really had that 'thing' for Asian girls. In fact, I was kind of surprised and amused to get to Japan to find all of the raging Japanophiles falling over themselves to get their mits on the locals. I just hadn't come into contact with it before. But lo and behold, look what happened. My wife is funny, very witty, a little kooky, worldly (she had lived in a couple of countries when I met her and has travelled through many others), has impeccable manners and a sense of social propriety when needed, is dedicated and hard working, kind to others and is from a great family. She is open minded and adventurous. She is, I guess, quite atypical and I am a lucky guy, but there are plenty of interesting women in Japan, you just have to find them.

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limboinjapan, fortune telling is an opportunity. Roll with it and all the mystical nonsense, and you will be rewarded! Basically women love their romantic imagery, and no I am not talking about just love. I am talking about stories, connections, the fantastic, feelings of fate and destiny. Men not understanding and providing these things is on the same level of a woman who has severe limits in the bedroom. They both are a jip.

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Monkeyz said: I love how you guys are all insisting you know what makeup looks like. I really bet you don't.

Well, you had a point. Allow me to change my overstatement of "no make-up" to a little make-up. If make up cost back home what it costs here, they could not afford all that they cake on.

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@bicultural 4:37 pm 26th Oct

the guys got a point though.

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Most Japanese women are concerned about their own image and what others perceived them to be and they have very little substance. There is alot of phony Japanese women with same teasing games playing with two faces. Most Japanese women lack maturity and character. They act like bunch of little kids going on thirty and forty. No wonder half the women between 30 to 40 have never been married, but keeps playing the same game. They will eventually become single obachan.

LOL. the best joke on the link! So agree! My colleagues are like that!

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Lots of good posts, except one:

-Terrible in bed compared to their western counterparts -flap and flounder around like a bin-liner in the wind -fake crying all the time -no brains -no personalities -no hobbies -can not think outside the box -all turn in Obasan when married

Basically, Japan can keep its women, thank you very much.

Durace, feel VERY sorry for you man.

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For some reason J girls sound like, well just regular girls. I figured this post would have something unique, guess i was wrong, haha.

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Mikanojo, you have just proved to me once and for all that the Japanese also do not have a sense of irony!

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It makes the guys go 'huh'? Maji de! Oki so maybe i can help the guys a bit? None of these are girl-trade secrets so i should b oki ne? And please understand i am generalizing a bit? NOT every woman is like this.. but enough of us are that these stereotypes DO exist.

1. They want to lose weight when they don’t need to.

This comes from 2 insecurities.. either they are insecure about their body and think that losing weight will help, or it is equally likely that they told you they are thinking about losing weight, because they are insecure in how YOU feel about their body. We want reassuring. Yes often. All of our lives.

2. When one says, “Kawaii!” all the others follow.

This is not something we all suffer from, but it is common enough.. it is the group thinking. When women are put together in groups many of us reaffirm each other, especially when it is harmless meaningless things like agreeing that some thing looks cute. These same women will often immediately tear a man apart for any reason you give them, and it does not need to be much.. a lustful leer, an odd comment.. you are better off avoiding women in groups just generally speaking.

They go to the bathroom in groups.

4. Even though they say “I’ll leave it up to you,” they complain about your choice.

If she actually SAYS that she is leaving it up to you, then it is very possibly a test of your loyalty and sensitivity to her and her feelings. If she compliments you on your choice then you made her feel loved and you appear considerate.. if she complains about your choice.. you failed.

5. They spend a really long time shopping.

Hai. Yes we do! Shopping is fun and interesting for us! We really enjoy just being there surrounded by so many choices and we will spend hours looking for the best things we can find, like it is a game for us! Many men seem to hunt more than they shop.. they go when there is a need, they find an item, grab it, bag it and run. Many women just enjoy the act of shopping.. so much that we can spend hours doing it and not even buy anything!

6. They shave their eyebrows just to draw them back on again.

Not all of us suffer from this.. but i have seen this too - they do not like how their eyebrows grow, so they remove the unwanted hair and then use the eyeliner to draw them how they WANT them to look. Personally i thin mine just at the outside corners but they are not some thing i obsess over.

7. They wear makeup every day.

Not all of us do this, and in fact it is not really healthy. This is usually a mix of things, it can be based on our self-esteem, or feeling that we must keep up an appearance for our boyfriend/girlfriend/boss. Personally i wash mai face often and moisturize and only wear a little makeup.. but some of us wear so much that it is a whole mask of powder, grease and cream.

8. They won’t directly say what they’re thinking.

Some of us do this, some of us do not. There is just too many possible reasons for this.. self-esteem keeps some of us from feeling brave enough to speak, our upbringing often has a powerful effect on how we say what we say and often we may just swallow our feelings down and try to say some thing we hope will be acceptable at the moment. If we are not saying what we are really thinking then we are uncomfortable for some reason about sharing those thoughts. After we become more comfy with you, then you will see more of what we are really thinking and feeling.

9. They’re obsessed with fortune-telling.

This is a mix of things some personal and some social. The occult is another mix of game and excuse for chatting for many of us.. for others it is literally part of their faith in the universe. How seriously we obsess with fortune-telling, blood types, birth animals.. depends on personal experiences for each of us, as well as how we were brought up and also how many of our friends are involved in it.

10. They have a separate stomach just for dessert.

We do?? lol actually no.. what we do is crave sweets! But we do not want to gain weight.. so often we will eat a smaller meal or not finish the meal, just so we will have space left to fill with dessert instead!

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Girls are girls no matter where they are from. This survey is shallow and akin to a Japanese girl thinking all Western men should be like Brad Pitt. That said, if this survey is just meant for humor effect then I laugh.

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Hmmm.... apart from 2 and 9, they all apply to western women as well me thinks. Women are, as we Men all know, a completely different species with unfathomable thought and behavioral patterns that would drive Mr. Spock (who is, admittedly, a Man) nuts. :-)

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Im amazed that the OP thinks these traits dont apply to all women.

(Except for the "kawaii" thing... but if you translate that into (fawning) then yeah, that applies too!)

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haha lots of generalizations, lots of truth, I have been married for quite some time & the mrs does 4-6 of these a week at least LOL

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The fortune telling thing and blood type will drive you insane, I have a strict rule NEVER ask me my blood type and don't even talk about it in front of me or in my house.

BTW many in Japan (even school teacher) will use the excuse "you should know your blood type in case of emergency" greatest BS ever no hospital will ever take a patience word on their blood type they will administer O - first then type match before giving you anything else!

It is amazing how Japanese women have fallen for this blood type crap my children have been asked so many times by teacher but only female ones never ever the males!

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I go for number 9... "I never get along with Type O people. Zettai we will not get along." GRRRR!!!

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I love how you guys are all insisting you know what makeup looks like. I really bet you don't.

Seriously, I don't know how many times I've had guys tell me how great it is that I don't wear makeup. Which is hilarious, since I wear it every day.

Then again, it wouldn't be worth the cost if it was hideously obvious.

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God bless Japan,I love this place

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Interesting list that as some have mentioned a lot could apply to most women world wide.

That said their is one major difference between Japanese women and most women I have met (not dated, I'm often that "friend guy" that girls all say they have, you know the one they call when they are upset about another guy or basically anything else, yeah I know pathetic!) and I have lived in several countries, only in Japan have I ever seen or met so many women that have set ideas about "the man" they want to the point of completely excluding even the idea of dating one that does not meet those set ideas.

I have seen women that will only date foreigner even if a really great Japanese guy comes along, and even these women have sub sections as to only for this country or that country, I have seen those who will only date Japanese men who work for this or that company or only from Tokyo, Doctors, Lawyers, etc...and I really do mean ONLY!

This sort of "selective dating" is so prominent in Japan that even after 19+ years it still shocks me.

And If I were to make a list that would be my number one!

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In Japan, marriage is not much more than a man giving almost all his salary to a woman to make children and take care of them. That does not mean Japanese women cheat more, but lots of them certainly consider money as more important than love or sex. Behind this, that cuteness, the kawaii factor is very powerful in Japanese women's mentality. They like babies, cute anime characters and cute clothes more than anything else, it seems. Men have an obsessive care about their job and status and for most of the men, their job is the first wife and the real wife is more of a roomate.

wow, you sure know about japanese marriage very well!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i read and hear things like this from non-japanese, but most of my japanese family friends are really nothing like this. fathers/husbands go out and spend time with their family on weekends.. at least the ones I hang out with always care about their families and they participate in sports with their kids, go to park with kids/family.. My family hang out with other Japanese families to go out with very often.

they like cute anime characters?? well, they might like some anime characters, but certainly not more than anything else... when i talk with my j-girl friends, anime talk is probably like once or twice a year, that's all.. even then, it's usually about some anime we used to watch as kids and talking about childhood memories.

I really don't like it when people generalize the whole J-women.. the whole J-families, Japanese people... Everyone is different and I think of those stero types really silly.

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I have seen quite a few women with weight problems here in Japan. They may still be smaller compared to some American women with weight issues, but compared to their fellow Japanese women, they are on the large size side.

WTF? Alpha, define large? What is large for you when talking about Japanese women. Size 7??? Perhaps a 9? That is just crazy! If you say a size 18, I understand, but this....

What is it about Japan and Japanese women that drive people into such a frenzy of disillusionment and disappointment? What are they promising from afar that they don't deliver on in real life? And is that really THEIR fault? I'm curious to know what people have to say about this.

@Tamarama

I ask myself that perplexing question daily why some men go into an Asian frenzy? I am married to a Japanese, but I never cared about that. I was just looking for "A good woman that happened to be Japanese." No one is saying that everything is their fault. But because since many of them stay at home until they marry or not. They often lack in personal experience or communication with men, but to an extent in a similar way this also goes for the men.

I did not know that you had taken a survey. :) I have been here a long time and I have been to many places and I know what make-up looks like. I also know that people tend to judge all of Japan based on what happens in Tokyo. I also know that people have a tendency to "oversample" that which stands out to them. I have spent most of my time in the country, but I still stand by what I said.

Actually, that is one of the things that I do, take surveys. I too, know what makeup looks like, I'm from LA believe me when I tell you this. I live in way down south in Kyushu so we have our own interesting culture here. You can stand by your statement, but Women in Japan do put on a bit too much and often it drowns out the natural beauty when many really don't need it.

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bass4funk at 06:58 AM JST - 26th October. By the time many Japanese women do marry, they don't know how to do basic household chores, especially cooking. I'm not generalizing, but this is indeed a serious problem and I hear it all day, how many married women complain about their lives, yes, a some of it is the man's fault, but often it's the woman's.

I enjoy reading your nice article.

In Japan, marriage is not much more than a man giving almost all his salary to a woman to make children and take care of them. That does not mean Japanese women cheat more, but lots of them certainly consider money as more important than love or sex. Behind this, that cuteness, the kawaii factor is very powerful in Japanese women's mentality. They like babies, cute anime characters and cute clothes more than anything else, it seems. Men have an obsessive care about their job and status and for most of the men, their job is the first wife and the real wife is more of a roomate.

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This and dying the hair to an auburn brown! There's this fraction of women in Japan that follow this trend. You could throw them all together in one bag and the common IQ you get out would still be below 2

My GF does both of those, and I bet she is smarter than you will ever be. Partially because she is intelligent enough not to generalize people by making assumptions about things totally irrelevant to one another.

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Where do you live? How many Japanese do you know that have a weight problem???

I have seen quite a few women with weight problems here in Japan. They may still be smaller compared to some American women with weight issues, but compared to their fellow Japanese women, they are on the large size side.

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I get a chuckle from this list. It seems accurate in a general way, they should add "attraction to name brand handbags"

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but to say that women in Japan generally don't care or seem that having to put on makeup is not a top priority, you are very much sadly mistaken.

I did not know that you had taken a survey. :) I have been here a long time and I have been to many places and I know what make-up looks like. I also know that people tend to judge all of Japan based on what happens in Tokyo. I also know that people have a tendency to "oversample" that which stands out to them. I have spent most of my time in the country, but I still stand by what I said.

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Actually, I always find it so interesting that there is this kind of discussion about J Women by expats living in Japan or other men with some kind of interest in the place. I mean, I wonder if the same thing goes on on the chatboards of 'Kenya Today' where the expats are all like 'Yeah man, they are just superficial gold diggers who blow out after marriage!' Why is this? What is it about Japan and Japanese women that drive people into such a frenzy of disillusionment and disappointment? What are they promising from afar that they don't deliver on in real life? And is that really THEIR fault? I'm curious to know what people have to say about this.

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@Nigel-

"They don't want to lose weight when they really need to"!!

Where do you live? How many Japanese do you know that have a weight problem??? Most Japanese women need to bulk up a bit on the top and definitely the bottom!!! Personally, I'll offer them another slice of Tiramisu!

Most Japanese women are concerned about their own image and what others perceived them to be and they have very little substance. There is alot of phony Japanese women with same teasing games playing with two faces. Most Japanese women lack maturity and character. They act like bunch of little kids going on thirty and forty. No wonder half the women between 30 to 40 have never been married

And why do you think that is? Have you stopped and asked yourself why are there so many beautiful women in Japan over 30 and NOT married and why the birthrate is so low? Not all of it is teasing, but a lot has to do with control, not wanting to conform to the social norm and also I find that men and women in Japan don't really hang out with each other seriously until after high school. Many of them don't real deep interaction, so I think there is a lot of misunderstanding between the two. Also I think that too many Japanese women live at home and don't know anything about the real world, I hear it all the time. Most of the women in my school are in their late 20' early 30's living at home working, NOT paying any rent, mom is still washing, cooking, cleaning for them. They get to go shopping all the time. Face it. I have been to 18 countries. Japanese women always look good as far as they go to great lengths to look good, whereas in most other countries, women don't go that insanely crazy about their wardrobe. When you go to a university in the states, a woman's look can vary to decent to downright scary, but in Japan, they look like they are going to dinner. So the emphasis to look good is more important than overall substance. Nowadays, Japanese women want to travel and see the world, many are not interested in getting married (There are many other reasons for that too) Most women in Western cultures are independent and want to leave home, most Japanese women are content with being at home. By the time many Japanese women do marry, they don't know how to do basic household chores, especially cooking. I'm not generalizing, but this is indeed a serious problem and I hear it all day, how many married women complain about their lives, yes, a some of it is the man's fault, but often it's the woman's. They don't want to engage their husbands in a meaningful conversation, no one wants to compromise. You do see a spike in divorces recently in Japan and now that the laws have changed making it easier for women to collect alimony more and more women are lining up. Japanese men are equally at fault, they have certain pre-conceived notions that women are supposed to be and act a certain way, if they don't, then they are not qualified to marry or taken really seriously.

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They want to lose weight when they don’t need to.

I'll take that over "They don't want to lose weight when they really need to"!!

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Most Japanese women are concerned about their own image and what others perceived them to be and they have very little substance. There is alot of phony Japanese women with same teasing games playing with two faces. Most Japanese women lack maturity and character. They act like bunch of little kids going on thirty and forty. No wonder half the women between 30 to 40 have never been married, but keeps playing the same game. They will eventually become single obachan.

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The list is not "THAT" different from other girls from other societies.

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Wow if that's what guys actually said then they're pretty clueless. Talk about introspects who can't see someone else's viewpoint or realize the obvious about their own society.

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When they say... "Again!?... we just did it last week!"

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It would seem that those surveyed need to set their standards slightly higher then just above the gutter. But then again they probable lack the social attributes to pick a girl with any sort of reasonable amount of intelligences.

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my experience also suggests that age is a factor, and I am not even talking about just plain being old. My hometown might be peculiar in this, but the only white women that look good without make-up are pretty much under 20, and there is so much competition for the legal ones its not worth me bothering. Yes, some J-women are scary. That was no my point. My point was that the percentage of women here who look great without make-up and generally don't even seem to bother seems to be much higher. And it is also amazing how many can go into their late 30s and still look good...even after kids. Not all. Just more.

Well beauty is totally subjective, but to say that women in Japan generally don't care or seem that having to put on makeup is not a top priority, you are very much sadly mistaken.

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I love Japanese girls. Exactly for all the reasons that make the 493 guys go 'Huh?'

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Shall we talk about girls who just want to try and finally get tired and want to be single mothers looking for absolute freedom.

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japanese women are so cute i think love them for that reason,even at 60s they still look 30,you have to believe me,they are one of the best women in the world and they are always sincere with their men....i only advice them to be more bold when you speak with a foreign and not run away when they open their mouth to say hiiiiiiiiiiii......sammy pip....

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They all say "Oishiiiiiiiiiii" as soon as the put the food in their mouth even before tasting it, especially if the restaurant has been featured on a TV show or magazine. (BTW 9 times out of 10 the food is inedible but they still squeal "Oishi" at 6 octaves above normal).

And the above brings up one more. Their obsession in having to go to every "in places" that is mentioned in a Magazine or TV (talento) show!

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bass4funk, my experience also suggests that age is a factor, and I am not even talking about just plain being old. My hometown might be peculiar in this, but the only white women that look good without make-up are pretty much under 20, and there is so much competition for the legal ones its not worth me bothering.

Yes, some J-women are scary. That was no my point. My point was that the percentage of women here who look great without make-up and generally don't even seem to bother seems to be much higher. And it is also amazing how many can go into their late 30s and still look good...even after kids. Not all. Just more.

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Shaving forearms has struck me as a little strange.

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Can't say the same for white girls. The lack of the need of make-up is definitely on the list of why I stayed here

That is so untrue, it all depends. I have seen hundreds of smoking White women again it all depends, diet, smoking, exercising, getting enough sleep. I have seen in every ethnic color gorgeous women and then again, I have seen some very scary Japanese women, so it goes both ways and it depends on what you really like, for me, I really don't care, if she's hot, she's hot regardless of race or color, but if you have an Asian fetish, then you might feel like that. Yes, when I first came to Japan, all Japanese women looked hot, but now, they look like everyone else.

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@tamarama Of course theyre not all like that but when the article itself deals with generalisations then alot of our responses will sound like one.Judging by the content of alot of the 60 0dd comments so far alot tend to agree with listed generalisations above ,all based on personal experiences here in japan no doubt.

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I asked a girlfriend one morning not to put on make-up, she agreed, and she looked a hundred times better. Natural, normal, and without the need of a spatula. But she felt naked without make-up so that only lasted one day. Sigh.

Maybe "naturally" she didn't look that great if she had to put the stuff on. Also, what is up with these fake eyebrows?? And is it necessary to put makeup on when riding the train, really, is it?

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They go to the bathroom in groups? Sounds smart. You never know what creep might follow you in if you are alone. Plus its a good place for girl talk. Mystery solved.

They wear make-up everyday? Well next time choose a girl who does not wear and does not need make-up brainiac! So many J-girls look fantastic without make-up. Can't say the same for white girls. The lack of the need of make-up is definitely on the list of why I stayed here.

They won't directly say what they are thinking? Nonsense. Near every woman in the world does that. For that matter, so does every guy! It depends on the thing they are thinking. Fact is, nobody is ever going have the mix of straight talk and indirect tact that will please you, so roll with it.

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Ladies, if a guy ever says that to you, go wash your face and see how happy he is. I guarantee he'll regret his words.

If you look like a mud duck, well sure, maybe, but I can only speak for myself, most women I have dated looked far, far better without makeup. But I also think and I can say this as an American, both Asian and American women wear too much makeup, so much that it can be a complete turn off, whereas most European women don't bathe in that junk. When I was growing up in Europe many of my female would come to the door go out for a drink and didn't give a hoot, just put on something decent, washed their face and we went out. I really want to see American or Asian women do that. It'll never happen! Most Japanese women won't even go downstairs to check the mail unless they get dolled up.

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Judderman, I 'spose what I am getting at is that here is a thread of studs dishing it out to Japanese women like they are the worst thing a man could endure. I know what they are like, I have lived there. But they aren't ALL like that, are they. It's disingenuous to generalize. You just have to be smart about how you shop. The ditzy ones might be fun for a roll around with, but unless you are stupid, you aren't going to marry them. Like anywhere (yes, my country included), there are great girls that any dope would be lucky to hitch. T'was all in the interests of balance....

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more depth than the average desert spoon

I'm stealing that! :-D

You get the shock of your life when you wake up in the morning and her eyebrows have rubbed off during the night.

:-O

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@tamarama, far away hills may look green to you..trust me alot of them are vapid,insipid,shallow,vain,one-dimensional future stepford wives.you need to appreciate the positives of some of the women in your own country like a decent sense of humour or not being afraid to put her point across or having the ability to have a decent conversation in the first place.

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-Terrible in bed compared to their western counterparts -flap and flounder around like a bin-liner in the wind -fake crying all the time -no brains -no personalities -no hobbies -can not think outside the box -all turn in Obasan when married

Basically, Japan can keep its women, thank you very much.

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You guys are kidding me. How I feel for you, having to put up with all those beautiful women that look amazing and flatter you and pander to your ego and still look astonishingly good at 60 years of age. Oh the torture! My country is full of fat women, who swear and are rude, have no sense of social propriety, who will tell you about their petty lives until the cows come home. Who might, if you are lucky, feign interest in you for a minute or two during a date. Who become even worse after marriage. Who keep getting fatter.

Snap out of it boys.

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Even though they say “I’ll leave it up to you,” they complain about your choice.

I think that's universal. Women hailing from just about any country always seem to have the habit of saying "I don't care, you choose" but then will complain later about how you never do or choose things that they like and always pick things they hate.

As for numbers 1 and 7 (about losing weight and putting on makeup), most Japanese females tell me the reason is that Japanese men only like thin women, and that Japanese men expect that as a woman gets older (and by older we mean over the age of 28) she must always have make up on to hide her age as much as she can.

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Shall we talk about the girls that work at the banks?

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juddernman sums it up quite well. "Wait till your married, nice to look at but nothing on the inside." The 11th point might be, "they'll object to whatever just to show they can." I think its their way of getting back at having been given ZERO opportunities. as in period. And when you think of it, its the way the society runs. Look at the choice the people have to vote on for politicians, the teams they have to cheer for, the athletes, the "talento" they/we have to watch ad naseum on the "major" channels year in and year out, year after year.

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Basically when you read between the lines of points 1-10 you can sum up your average J-girl as being: 1.Image concious to a ridiculous degree. 2.Lacking individual opinion or taste..the collective "eeehhh"s and "kawaii"s are just one example in a long list of such behaviour.like sheep they follow each other in buying the latest fads/trends/fashions also. 3.See point2 4.If just boyfriend/girlfriend she might do this..if youve married one youll hear it alot more. 5.alot of students i used teach would always give the "go to shopping" answer when asked about hobbies. 6.you would think not having eyebrows would save time getting ready but if anything it gives them another excuse to buy yet more cosmetics. 7.vain beyond belief which is linked to how immature and insecure they can be. 8.wait till youre married! 9.see pt.7 10.that overpriced cake they just bought which a guy could eat in a bite could be filled with the greatest load of crap but as long as its decorated well with lots of swirls,ribbons and decorations,theyll buy it and take ages eating it.this could also sum up a j-girl..nice to look at but nothing on the inside.

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Yeah, the make-up thing is a little sad. Unfortunately when all the women around you are wearing it, it makes you want to do it too. But it's such a hassle to put on every morning. I can't imagine spending more than 10 minutes on my make-up. I don't get the heels and the designer brands either. The excessive 'kawaiiii' and 'eee' can be annoying sometimes. Not everything is that cute or amazing!

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Ladies, if a guy ever says that to you, go wash your face and see how happy he is. I guarantee he'll regret his words.

I asked a girlfriend one morning not to put on make-up, she agreed, and she looked a hundred times better. Natural, normal, and without the need of a spatula. But she felt naked without make-up so that only lasted one day. Sigh.

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You get the shock of your life when you wake up in the morning and her eyebrows have rubbed off during the night.

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As for three, women like to gossip together in the bathroom. You know how in olden days the guys would go to the smoking room to chat without women around? Kind of the same principle. Also, it's a safety thing.

Number four, women are taught that men and their egos need to get their way. If the women actually made choices instead, number four would be, "They make all the decisions and emasculate me!"

Number seven, I've noticed most guys say "I like a girl who doesn't wear makeup," but what they really mean is, "I like a girl who is wearing makeup but doesn't look like she is." Ladies, if a guy ever says that to you, go wash your face and see how happy he is. I guarantee he'll regret his words.

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Complain about their breast size, but do nothing about it!

It could be worse, they could go across the pond to S. Korea or China where everyone practically gets custom-sized breasts...and noses!

Meeting a girl sounding like "Tweety" ain't scoring brownie points either!!!

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-Walk pigeon-toed -Avoid eye contact -Laugh too much

They often wear shoes too big, so when they do walk pigeon-toed, it looks even funnier. They do a V-peace sign close to their cheeks while pouting their lips like Marilyn Monroe thinking it's "Oh, so cute." Waving at you with extended arms, hands opened, palms upward!!! They love to go drinking with you and get excited, but after the 2nd Chu Hi are calling it a night! They think that EVERYONE cares about their (sometimes fake) Louis Vuitton giant-sized parachute bag and you just might be envious of them! WTF????

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i felt bad about it right after i wrote it.

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They walk in high heels like a 5 year old wearing Mommy's shoes. They ride their bicycles in high heels. That's a mad skill right there.

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If you throw an apple at 50 percent of their faces, it will stick if they are smiling.

Oh my, KaptainKichigai. that was funny but harsh..

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They want to lose weight but never do, unless they break up with their boyfriend

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There is this old joke about a guy who trades in his 40 year old wife in for two 20s. Ha. ha ha.

Except when you really think about it, it is the definition of hell. You grow up with your wife, you raise kids, and then you want to start over trying to deal with the average idiot "Japanese girl"?

This list of ten things above is chock full of typical stupidity, which is reinforced by constant contact with stupid friends and insipid reading material. You know, if a guy-friend did these things, you just would not hang around with him, so why do girls get away with it? Because men see them as sex objects. Women might become normal people if men stopped looking at them as sex objects.

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They spend hours getting ready!!!Complain about their breast size, but do nothing about it!

mm... should they have a surgery to have bigger boobs then? and it is a universal thing that women take longer to get read! ;)

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Raise their voice by a couple of octaves? All carry the same Louis Vuitton bags? Walk from the knees rather than the hips? Yearn for marriage from the second they leave high school?

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4,5,7,8 are attributes of my wife. I am sure there is a list for foreign guys of which I fulfil 5 out of 10.

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They’re obsessed with fortune-telling.

The "What's your blood type?" thing always amuses me.

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Number 1, 5, 7, and to some extent, 6, 8, and 10 American girls too, so there is'nt all that much difference, but the difference there is, I find very kawaii! LOL

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they more than make up for these minor gripes. anyway, i agree a goo survey is probably a low end crowd. and j blokes pet hates are also probably not a good list.

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texting on their keitais in the middle of a conversation.

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numbers 6 and 7 Japanese guys do too. They get absolutely HORRID haircuts. They wear their skirts way to high and then obsess about pulling them down lower every third step they take. They wear old woman sunglasses 12 sizes too large for their faces at night while riding bicycles with their shaded eyes glued to their cellphones. If you throw an apple at 50 percent of their faces, it will stick if they are smiling.

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They spend hours getting ready!!! Complain about their breast size, but do nothing about it! Spend 200 thousand yen on a handbag and only have 10 thousand yen inside it!
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They use a chihuahua or toy poodle as a fashion attachment.
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They shave their eyebrows just to draw them back on again.

This and dying the hair to an auburn brown! There's this fraction of women in Japan that follow this trend. You could throw them all together in one bag and the common IQ you get out would still be below 20!

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-Walk pigeon-toed -Avoid eye contact -Laugh too much

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Had to laugh at this one. Yup, pretty much sums up your average young Japanese girl. Then I went back through the list to see which ones apply to my wife. Number 4 (except she doesn't complain) number 8 (seeing some improvement here) and definitely number 10.

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Eyebrows are a natural way to prevent sweat from getting in your eyes. You shave them off, and then you have to be seen carrying around a little terry cloth hankie to keep wiping/patting off the sweat! Would not want to wipe, or you have to go back on the train and put on your make-up. Hey, why isn't putting on make-up on the train not on this list?

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they talk loudly they laugh loudly they are Brand Mania they don't got own opinion they change bf like brand item they do not know the real meaning of Kawaii(evrything is Kawaii) For more details listen the song of Ace of Base "Tokyo Girl"
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They always say "kawaii" Japanese women will use kawaii for everything, especially if its furry! Probably might say the same thing to Road kill too. I mean, most of the time the little critters are furry, "bloody", but furry.

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It isn't new or Japanese. The 1920's and many other times in modern American fashion women have done the same.

It isn't the 1920's anymore! Prohibition is Out! They need to sorta catch up!

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They respect 'talento' and believe nearly everything they say... This I will never understand.

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They go to the bathroom in groups.

LOL. I still find it funny to see women go to the loo in groups...also after work they waited for each other to go down the lift as well!

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"The eye brow shaving is really weird."

It isn't new or Japanese. The 1920's and many other times in modern American fashion women have done the same.

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The eye brow shaving is really weird.

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They all apply to women universally (substitute kawaii for native language). It's the double x chromosome dudes, live with it. Ahhhhhh women, can't live with them, ..................

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I have no idea why to above post ended up as bold type

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6 applies to (far too) many Japanese men too. 8 and 10, can apply to the Japanese population as a whole. 1,3,4,5 & 8, apply to women worldwide
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"They wear mini-skirts in winter."

This is generally a good thing.

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11 - They open their mouths.
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They wear mini-skirts in winter.

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4 irritates me something fierce :(
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"Are you calling NTT Docomo users lower class."

Perhaps just pointing out that Docomo is just another "brand" item. Expensive, declining quality and lots of market appeal. There are far better solutions in terms of price etc...

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are you referring to the Goo Ranking site? Wow you really are looking to have a got at someone

Hardly. Just working on assimilating everyone's opinions with mine. And yes I was referring to the site. Take a look at how people vote and what not.

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Are you calling NTT Docomo users lower class, or you just don't know what you're talking about?

surely you jest... are you referring to the Goo Ranking site? Wow you really are looking to have a got at someone....wait until the end of the day. Sorry if you use DoCoMo and took it personally.

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Most of this applies to all women, not just Japanese women. Except #6.

They spend 1/4 of their lives doing laundry and treat underwear as if it were plans to blow up the UN.
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Doesnt 3,4,5,8 and 10 count for EVERY Woman?

And why bann kawaii? I dont mind. I prefer it more than the eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee gasp

ran out of air.

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I love it when they try to open their eyes wide when all dressed up and interacting with a girl that is more aesthetically pleasing than themselves.

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If any of this is news to anyone, anywhere, I would be very surprised. Most of the list applies to young girls in any developed nation.

JT, please hire some writers who have more depth than the average desert spoon. Would be nice to read something at least vagueline interesting.

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Then again look who took the survey. I think this is more of the lower class crowd (group) IMHO...

Are you calling NTT Docomo users lower class, or you just don't know what you're talking about?

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Then again look who took the survey. I think this is more of the lower class crowd (group) IMHO...

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"They’re obsessed with fortune-telling."

This was a sore spot with me and an old girlfriend. I got tired of hearing about it.

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1.The TV talents say we have to

2.If I become prime minister ever, I'll ban this word.

3.Really? We were like 90% girls, and everyone went to the bathroom alone.

4.Of course, you're supposed to read minds,like them.

5.Spending money is serious thing, one needs to think their choice over.

6.And?

7.Will you go on a date with a girl without makeup?Twice?

8.I thought it's a national feature...

9.They feel insecure.

10.Why is this a problem?

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Yeah some pretty frivolous action here, although survey on the site for J-women on their counterparts reveals some more valid concerns - spitting on the sidewalk being number one.

Interesting info on shaving the eyebrows as well, stemming back to the Nara period but serving a different purpose from today. Also says men amongst the elite did it for coming-of-age.

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Number 4 does me in every time.

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they tell me i am fat when i am not. they cancel dates with the excuse my grandmothers cat got a cold. (true story)

lets go guys...add some more to the list. lets get to 100!!!

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And in other news, a recent survey found that young Japanese guys have the same habits...

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