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When do Japanese people have their first kiss?

30 Comments
By Steven Simonitch

Japanese men aren’t known for being the most romantically aggressive bunch. Many young Japanese women lament over having to take the lead just to get out of the dugout and onto first base.

If Japanese guys are so reluctant to get touchy-feely, you’ve got to wonder: at what age do Japanese people have their first kiss?

Japanese mobile company NTT Docomo conducted an online poll in September that asked respondents to divulge when they first closed their eyes and puckered up. The poll received 36,818 entries.

Before we looks at the results, it’s important to realize that dating and kissing as we know it in the Western world is still something relatively new to Japan, a country where arranged marriages still exist and, until recently, kissing was something traditionally reserved for the bedroom. While Japanese women may be ready to adopt the kiss as a form of showing affection, their male counterparts might just need some time to adjust.

That said, here are the juicy details you’ve been waiting for:

■ When did you have your first kiss? (36,818 votes total)

  1. High school (9,878 votes)
  2. Never kissed (6,119 votes)
  3. Middle school (6,021 votes)
  4. After entering workforce and before 31 (5,771 votes)
  5. College (4,262 votes)
  6. Preschool/Kindergarten (2,423 votes)
  7. Elementary school (2,029 votes)
  8. After 31 (331 votes)

Putting together high school, middle school, college, preschool/kindergarten and elementary school, a little over 60% of respondents had their first kiss by their early 20s.

On the other hand, some 6,000 respondents didn’t have their first kiss until after they entered the workforce, and another 6,000 or so have never kissed at all. Perhaps these people just place more value on their first kiss than others. But looking at the growing ranks of frustrated Japanese women, general apathy toward romantic relationships seems the more likely suspect.

Source: Goo Ranking

© RocketNews24

©2020 GPlusMedia Inc.

30 Comments
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Wow! A new low. Bashing Japanese men (what IS romantically aggressive?!) and making sexist undertones at the same time. Bravo.

5 ( +14 / -9 )

So about 17% of Japanese people have never kissed another human being. So it's a good bet that they may well have never had sex, particulary the women. That must be something like 20 million sexless adults. Incredible. Little wonder the birth rate is falling.

And just for the record I didn't consider the first kiss as getting to "first base". First base for me was a little further down the line. A kiss on the first date was a given. An absolute minimum even.

-5 ( +7 / -12 )

I wonder how many Japanese learn how to kiss from watching those insipid TV dramas and movies. And how come in those dramas, the couple always kiss with their lips closed?

0 ( +5 / -5 )

It's pretty safe to say that the pre-school/kindergarden groups do not count...

7 ( +10 / -3 )

some of them don't remember getting kissed by their moms the day they were born...

7 ( +10 / -3 )

With "Seku-Hara" rules being so strict perhaps guys are hesitant to make the first move.

-1 ( +7 / -8 )

Bashing Japanese men

Not bashing - just pointing out the facts. Japanese men, on the whole, are more Lewis than Martin. And since arranged marriage is a thing of the past, a lot (and I mean a lot) of Japanese men and women will never marry and possibly never kiss.

1 ( +5 / -4 )

I wonder how many Japanese learn how to kiss from watching those insipid TV dramas and movies. And how come in those dramas, the couple always kiss with their lips closed?

That's not how they do it in AV. It's all very, er, tonguey , slurpy and dribbly, more like eating a fast-melting ice cream.

...not that I'm complaining!

-1 ( +4 / -5 )

With "Seku-Hara" rules being so strict perhaps guys are hesitant to make the first move.

Sexual harassment is just a fad in Japan. They never really understood what it was, just like kokusaika.

It's just another foreign fad!

-5 ( +2 / -7 )

Dent, where are these facts you speak of? Please list the studies. If it is a fact, there should be plenty of articles with research to back it up.

Why this article blames the MEN for the issue here is beyond me. Don't the women also have a say in who and when they kiss someone? Oh right, not lady like which is exactly why I said this was also sexist. If you want to point fingers, why not point the fingers at the mother here who raise their sons to behave the way they do. Funny how you never see that discussed by foreign men.

1 ( +6 / -5 )

Was the question "kiss" or "romantic kiss"? Surely there can't be such a high percentage who have never been kissed (say by parents or similar?)

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Dent, where are these facts you speak of? Please list the studies.

t - you know what a busy man I am. I would love to satisfy your requests but there are others who have been waiting patiently.

A simple google search or even a bit of investigation on this fine website should give you all the information you need.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

But looking at the growing ranks of frustrated Japanese women, general apathy toward romantic relationships seems the more likely suspect.

Fact is you'll have happy and frustrated women everywhere in the world. Why bash and single out Japanese men? I've seen looser men and disgruntled women in all races.

I tell you something, most Japanese women are actually really into their Japanese men, and wouldn't give the time of day to the regular foreign dude here. Those charisma men days are long over LOL

5 ( +7 / -2 )

Oh, so you have no facts. That's all you had to say. Like I said, mere bashing of Japanese males but foreign men. Its old and tired.

-3 ( +3 / -6 )

Many young Japanese women lament over having to take the lead just to get out of the dugout and onto first base.

It's called equality. Get used to it.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

That's where the Gaijin come into the picture, so go out and pick up those women!! Many are dying to have some attention, and the Gaijin factor doesn't hurt either. If the Japanese men can't satisfy them, then somebody else can.

-2 ( +5 / -7 )

Eeh, Japanese people kiss? At all?

Seriously, though, I have once seen a couple doing some real kissing. It was in Shibuya station a late Friday night and they really went at it. Made me smile to see that kind of unshamed show of emotions.

2 ( +4 / -2 )

It's hard to believe that Japanese (men and women) are so shy. On one hand we have this increasing thing about AV actresses (maybe it's their frustration to get some action) on the other, a lot of pop idol groups with girls that are not allowed to have boyfriends, which means that they will have to wait until graduation to have a romantic relationship.

It seems that emotions and passions just have to be kept in Japanese people minds.

I've seen some Japanese dramas (not only Japanese BTW) and it's kind of annoying to see couples kissing, coming from SouthAmerica, my Latin blood gets frozen at those scenes. Those kisses are insipid, boring and unconvincing, the only one that was a good kiss was made by Mizushima Hiro to Nana Eikura in "Mei -chan no shitsuji" because it was well balanced and soft, not overdone and just for the scene.

In my country, I was considered a late kisser and I had my FK at 14, imagine what my classmates would call Japanese.

Oh, another thing, I suggest the ladies lay off so much make up or elaborated presentations, they drive men away because they feel fear. Many women unconsciously self-sabotaged that way; a bloodred lipstick for example is intimidating and not attractive for kissing, to wear so much foundation in order to get a "flawless" skin like any AKB girl can backfire if it is too much. For TV, people wear a lot of make up same as in theater but in a face to face meeting, it is more welcoming (for a kiss) to look as natural as possible...

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Like Tmarie I have to ask - what is romantically aggressive? And who would want their men to be aggressive towards them? What a strange choice of words.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Many young Japanese women lament over having to take the lead just to get out of the dugout and onto first base...................................... hope they don't need guidance to second base and beyond

0 ( +0 / -0 )

i think the never kissed group were probably making fun of the survey...... or a large proportion of them anyway

1 ( +1 / -0 )

This is to show that Japan is civilized but Japanese is timid.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

These figures are very similar to individuals in the United States! Kissing in most instances, is better than having sex!

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Don't they watch movies? Maybe they should start playing "Spin the Bottle" In a group gathering ... That should break the ice !

0 ( +1 / -1 )

play " doctor " worked for me....................

0 ( +0 / -0 )

most Japanese women are actually really into their Japanese men, and wouldn't give the time of day to the regular foreign dude here.

Are you so sure of that?

Anyways, I would wager the the results would be similar in various Asian countries, possibly due to the fact that public displays of emotion are still somewhat frowned upon?

0 ( +0 / -0 )

That being said, I certainly would not complain if women, Japanese or otherwise would start taking the lead and initiate more intimate contact.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Only once have I kissed a Japanese girl that was very good at it. The rest, well, suffice to say I was their first kiss. Bummer for them because I think it should be a precious experience with someone you actually love, and bummer for me because I enjoy a good kissing partner more than anything.

Too many people here to find an answer to the problem exposed in the article, but I have seen and experienced some difficult women here. Women playing hard-to-get or just beings outright defensive, and not just against me but towards anyone in general. Fortunately, there is not shortage of options if you look for them, but if you stop to think and analyze the situation, you can see a lot of men and women who do not have a clear romantic future. Sad to see people that I actually know and think, "Oh god, this person has no chance". This is not exclusive to Japan, but I feel that only a cultural revolution could improve things here... in many levels.

Poor guys. You can always pay for sex, but not for a loving kiss.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

"That's where the Gaijin come into the picture, so go out and pick up those women!! Many are dying to have some attention, and the Gaijin factor doesn't hurt either. If the Japanese men can't satisfy them, then somebody else can."

Wow. That is a douchebag stater kit instruction manual if I ever read one.

"I tell you something, most Japanese women are actually really into their Japanese men, and wouldn't give the time of day to the regular foreign dude here. Those charisma men days are long over LOL"

Great point. But if Japanese women are human and their affections aren't being reciprocated here, don't be that guy on the Maury Povich show trying to figure out how he got there

0 ( +0 / -0 )

I believe attraction and love is something so magical and transcends race, culture, age and more. If the world's people were scrambled across the planet and all struck blind...we would see love in its true and raw form. Love for the tendernous and respect and joy and giving it truly is. I adore a Japanese man. I am N American. I cringe to write those words...because I see him with my heart, not my eyes. To make my point...when someone really loves someone, race and culture melt and meld. Wishing you all a true non judgemental LOVE.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

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