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Why some women are traveling to South Korea to find boyfriends

25 Comments
By Min Joo Lee

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Skip most of the romantic K-dramas.

“I feel so safe around Korean men,” one Swedish woman told me. “Men back home are so [sexually] aggressive. They grope me and try to have sex all the time. I do not like that.”

There is another side to Korea in the desperation and raw sex portrayed in hits like Squid Game and Parasite.

12 ( +12 / -0 )

Reality is gonna hit them hard once they realize the difference between the actual world and the world of entertainment

23 ( +24 / -1 )

It's only your personal thought that you think girls from overseas visiting South Korea to find boyfriend.

In reality, they aren't like in the drama. They prioritize their career first over any girl, then sex for fun, followed by money, then their family decision, then their life style, and love for the girl comes quite to the last.

Same as with South Korean girls except that money comes before sex for them.

12 ( +16 / -4 )

Good.

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

This is a rather superficial approach to relationships.

9 ( +9 / -0 )

Sure there will be lots of disappointments, but when is that not the case ever? I mean, it's not like lots of people come or even move to Japan in pursuit of their imagination of an anime technopolis wonderland ... with a rather harsh awakening to follow.

I say, let everyone try to be happy, let everyone pursue their dreams. Also let everyone make their own mistakes. If it takes this to discover that television is not real life, so be it. Disappointments and setbacks are an inevitable -- and arguably necessary -- part of life. And if they actually find what they are looking for, hey, more power to them.

3 ( +4 / -1 )

So we got Waifu and Husbando. Now a Super-K-Man?

2 ( +2 / -0 )

I love this article. As a youth, I absolutely hated melodramas. They were all made in America, and to my mind awful. Saw my first k-drama in 2009, "Be Strong Glum-Soon," and was hooked. As the author mentioned, I watched them on Dramafever, and when that site shut down, on Rakuten Viki and Netflix. The author mentioned Guardian and My Love From the Star, which I have watched multiple times, both. So far, I make a point of watching My Love from the Star once a year. I read an article analyzing the series, and it pointed out that it is the most watched TV show in the history of planet Earth. I imagine that is because of the tremendous success it had in Asia.

Some of the Korean shows are what I call guilty pleasures - not especially memorable, but fun to watch. Others are of surprisingly high quality, and I don't feel guilty for watching them, at all.

:Since the advent of streaming services, it isn't just Korean shows that we watch. Have seen good shows from Japan and Taiwan, and from many different European countries. Less often, we watch shows from Latin America or China.

It is a shame what Xi has done to the Chinese arts. Before his clampdown on Chinese society, there were some wonderful shows coming out of that country.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

One last thing.....I read that when the male lead of My Love from the Star got married in South Korea, thousands of Japanese women traveled to that country for the wedding.

5 ( +5 / -0 )

Like we used to say, "It's just TV."

7 ( +8 / -1 )

a type of masculinity that’s sometimes called “soft” masculinity.

OOKKAAYY

1 ( +5 / -4 )

Hey Aly, Care to expand on OOKKAAYY? Maybe a little sexist or I am being over analytical on St Patrick's Day.

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

Hey Aly, Care to expand on OOKKAAYY?

just seems like an oxymoron to me that's all.

Maybe a little sexist or I am being over analytical on St Patrick's Day.

How is that sexist? the term has nothing to do with gender roles

2 ( +4 / -2 )

My girlfriend and I have been watching S. Korean TV dramas for over 4 yrs and overall have been satisfied with the content. One of the main reasons we watch them is that there no gratuous sex scenes, no bedroom scenes, etc...etc.. We are not interested in the men though, although the 'hero's' are depicted as good, well dressed and well behaved. One thing we both hate is that all the men depicted seem to have a right to grab a womans arm and drag her to where ever, It happens in every drama we have see. We love the girls though, their acting and beauty is outstanding. And as of yet, we have not seen any drama that concerns gay people, which is sad. As gay women, we would love to see a drama with gay women in it, but I do not see that happening soon. Oh, and our pet hate is the constant drinking and eating and crying scenes, we both think that if scenes like this were taken out most of the 50 minute dramas would be reduced to 15 minutes. But most of the actual story lines are good. Our favourites of all time, so far, is I am not a Robot, and the one where a rich woman crash lands her kite thing in N. Korea.

-1 ( +1 / -2 )

Regarding the comment about the lack of gay themes, are we watching the same shows? It isn't my thing, but I am surprised by the number of gay lovers in K dramas.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Can anyone explain the weird pink lipstick on both men and women? And those bowler haircuts on the guys?

5 ( +5 / -0 )

This is so hilarious, there is hardly any other country as chauvinistic as Korea.

4 ( +5 / -1 )

Arriving in Korea with the idea that the men in entertainment business are identical to those in real life is like arriving in Japan believing that it is identical to what the anime shows.. (Maybe some little cultural things and some places, but a very few things, like it or not lol !!)..

The first time I arrived in Japan I thought that Son Goku and Kenshin Himura were waiting for me when I left the plane, what a disappointment... LOL !!..

0 ( +2 / -2 )

It's always seemed to me that the immigrants who do the worst in Japan are those who were deep into anime and came to Japan with expectations of what they thought Japan was supposed to be. The gap between their expectations and reality seem to crash a lot of them. Conversely, the people who have done the best are those who came to Japan without expectation, and just settled into the country as it is, rather than expecting it to be something they got from anime.

Ironic, and a bit sad really. But in my experiences it's been fairly consistent across the board.

-1 ( +1 / -2 )

I’ve had friends whose wives are in the 50s travel alone to Korea in search of Korean actors and romantic pursuits with Korean men. Korean dramas have rejuvenated their dull and domestic lives

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Tando, I can think of one, J---n.....its below Kuwait in the gender equality table, it seems that men try to replace their mother with a wife, it is no wonder the birth rate is down, no wonder that Japanese women do not want to marry and prefer to live alone, and no wonder they look beyond Japanese shores for someone who will love, respect and treat them as an equal.

-1 ( +1 / -2 )

Ironically, the Vietnamese media has been rife over the years with stories about the abuse so many Vietnamese women have experienced at the hands of their Korean husbands.

The men, who can't find brides at home, like Vietnam because the women have white complexions, unlike Thailand, Phils, etc. Yep, quality humans we're talking about here. That's the reality.

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Several decades ago, Tuan Tran, a Vietnamese immigrant sitting next to me in our Japanese class at the University of Minnesota told me that, in Vietnam, they have a saying: "If you [a man] want to live a long and satisfying life, live in the French style, eat Chinese food, and marry a Japanese woman." I can only attest to the last but have found it to be VERY true. But, then, I've had several Japanese women tell me I was more like a Japanese man than a 6'3" Celtic American. It's really all just a crap shoot, I think, and, it would seem that, at least in America (50% divorce rate), luck and self-knowledge has as much to do with successful long term mating as anything. Fortunately, Bae Doona was still in diapers at the time and not on media screens or things might have gone differently and less satisfyingly for me...

0 ( +2 / -2 )

Arriving in Korea with the idea that the men in entertainment business are identical to those in real life is like arriving in Japan believing that it is identical to what the anime shows.. (Maybe some little cultural things and some places, but a very few things, like it or not lol !!)..

The first time I arrived in Japan I thought that Son Goku and Kenshin Himura were waiting for me when I left the plane, what a disappointment... LOL !!..

I believe this is the first post you ever written that actually had something to contribute to the discussion without trolling. Well done.

-1 ( +2 / -3 )

I had to read that headline twice. Really.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

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