have your say

What do you think are some of the biggest mistakes single men or women make on their first date which usually torpedo any chance of a relationship?


©2019 GPlusMedia Inc.

Login to comment

For me, talking about money or marriage.

It's a first date, not a job interview.

6 ( +6 / -0 )

I'd say the biggest mistake is taking advice from anyone on the internet on how to "do" dates.

But what the heck; don't (as Bintaro says above) talk about finance or past romances. Don't be aloof in order to look cool but don't look needy, either. Don't be playing with yer phone, don't check it, don't field calls. Don't be late, don't pick a fight, and don't get lush.

Talk about yourself but don't dominate the conversation. Listen to your date. Most importantly, relax. Don't put on a persona.

And that's my dating advice. It worked for me over the centuries, at any rate.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

When she doesn't even REACH for the bill. C'mon just a reach would be fine or even taking the purse out!

-1 ( +2 / -3 )

Of course, women shouldn't be reaching for any bills, daves or steves if their date has been an absolute boor.

7 ( +8 / -1 )

Ladies if you have bad breath or use strong cheap perfume you are torpedoed never to be contacted again. Thank you.

0 ( +4 / -4 )

being really bossy or playing mind games. I'd end the date SUPER early

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Sometimes being too nice is a little weird. Fun story, when I was like 19 a guy I worked with asked me on a date, he was generally nice so I said yes but I had been rear ended by someone a few days earlier and my back bumper was really damaged and hanging off the car so I told him I couldn't drive there so we'd meet at my friends house. No problem. But on the day of the date I came out of the apartment complex late morning and the entire bumper was REPLACED and the back lights were changed and polished up and he left a note saying he had hired someone to fix my car so I wouldn't have to worry about driving to the date. It was a really nice thought but I didn't tell him where I lived (I guess it wouldn't be too hard to find, but still) and whoever fixed it had to have done it over night in the parking lot??? Plus I can't imagine what it cost? I told him I appreciated it and I tried to pay him for it but he refused. I felt so bad I still went on the date but it was really uncomfortable and awkward because it felt like I owed him something. There was no second date and work was really awkward until I left like 8 months later.

So maybe keep it light fellas. (shrug)

6 ( +7 / -1 )

For guys, wearing a baseball hat or sunglasses on the first date.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

So Jeff you're not attracted to guys in baseball hats or sunglasses?

Another turnoff is a lady who appears to be taking steroids and has biceps bigger than a grapefruit and more facial hair than me.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

If we're out for dinner and you're rude to the staff, there won't be a second date.

6 ( +6 / -0 )

Driving to a love hotel or motel.

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Driving to a love hotel or motel.

That certainly never bothered me.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

Talking yourself up & talking 'too much' about your ex(es).

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Talking about yourself too much and not listening to your date.

Being rude to staff in the restaurant/pub.

Talking about the ex.

Talking about marriage and kids.

Expecting sex.

Spouting sexist/racist/twattish views.

Using your phone when you are supposed to be engaging with your date.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

That certainly never bothered me.

OK. Not driving to a love hotel or motel then.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

Assuming the other person (the man) is going to pay the bill and not even pretending to offer to pay her fair share.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Male date - not offering to pay the bill.

Female date - talking about themselves and exes.

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Not having a sense of humor - which makes dating in Japan MUCH MUCH more challenging.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

I believe that the biggest date killer is a person's inner character, which is formed long before the date occurs.

The person who works hard to develop good character traits and habits such as honesty, sincerity, generosity, confidence and personal grooming, is most likely to be successful in dating as these qualities will be apparent to dating partners.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Being rude to staff in the restaurant/pub.

A thousand times this. I've witnessed it from dates, mates and bosses and it's the lowest of the low. I do wonder what the individuals who indulge in that kind of behaviour think they are achieving?

And for heaven's sake, don't do it in a restaurant before you order, lest you imbibe all manner of nastiness.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

On first dates...

Talking about past relationships.

Thinking you are cooler/funnier than you really are.

Expecting anything physical.

Putting little thought into the date location/plan.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Mistakes? Just getting that first date is an achievement. Why worry about the problems? Enjoy it!

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Login to leave a comment

Facebook users

Use your Facebook account to login or register with JapanToday. By doing so, you will also receive an email inviting you to receive our news alerts.

Facebook Connect

Login with your JapanToday account

User registration

Articles, Offers & Useful Resources

A mix of what's trending on our other sites