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© KYODOJapanese women feeling pressured by image of perfect 'mama': study
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Toshihiro
Japanese women really have it hard. If you're working until beyond a certain age, you get criticized for not marrying. If you work while you're married and have kids, you get picked on by the management, and if you become a full-time housewife, you still have to keep up with appearances society expects you to conform with.
Kutan
Sorry, but in Japan, I feel more for the salary man who has to be a slave in the office until retirement (or death...).
n1k1
I just asked my japanese wife if she feels any stress of being perceived as imperfect mama.
Perceived by whom ? who are these people ? was the answer .. there you see the brain still works. I think she is happy and healthy (Dr. Hamster voice) .
kohakuebisu
Compared to the full-time jobs some Japanese mothers do and many women do overseas, this is still relatively easy.
I have a lot of time for academia, but this is a recent graduate of Japan studies commenting on a selection of women's magazines seen through a non-Japanese lens. How about asking a decent cross-section of Japanese women what they think with open-ended questions? The methodology used here strikes me as very weak.
TokyoJoe
However hard Japanese women have it they should know compared to Japanese men they are on easy street. Salaryman are willing slaves, walking zombies dragging their feet through the station everyday to their miserable desk job. Once they get caught in the honeytrap it's all downhill from there. Not welcome in their own house, separate beds, what meager penance they get thrown from their masters gets grabbed by their wife and they will be lucky to get enough for a fami chicken and a can of chu hi. It's horrific.
kohakuebisu
I think would be interesting to show under-40 Japanese men what life is like for men in the West, how many hours they work, how days off they have, how much housework or child rearing they do and do the same for Japanese women and women in the West. I wouldn't be surprised if Japanese men were more into the Western way than Japanese housewives were into the idea of working full-time in return for their husband sharing the housework.
mountaingrill
Everything TokyoJoe said!
ReasonandWisdomNippon
Let's ignore the salary men.
Lets ignore the pressure being put on men to succeed.
Lets ignore the higher suicide rate among men compared to women.
Men are toxic or bad just because your a man, that's what the media says.
Men's problems are ignore, hidden, while women's issues are all over the media and all over magazines.
wanderlust
Not just magazines, but manga, anime, commercials, TV dramas, all promoting the same image.
And you can guess who is behind them, the Ministry of Propaganda! D....u.
Mag
Japanese women are in a much better position than most women in the world! They have the luxury of going to salons, massages, wild shopping of branded clothes, bags, cosmetics and spend so much time with friends at restaurants / coffee shops ... all in all they live a luxurious life! So many other women in the world are like slaves! They should stop all this whining!
miss_oikawa
No, say it ain't so! We certainly needed an elite university to inform us of that.
And no media in any other country does anything comparable in any way, shape or form.
MaikuC
@Cricky would you prefer a competent manager or one chosen based on some arbitrary criteria such as gender, sexual preference etc?
albaleo
If that's the basis of measurement, I have to wonder how other countries figure. I'm thinking of the women I know in Japan and those I know here in the UK. None of them fit the images I've seen in magazines in either country.
Or perhaps closer links to the Takurazuka Theatre which has been around for longer.
savethegaijin
All of these men speaking for women. Charming.
There must be some really bad collective dating preferences if all of you think all Japanese women stay home, do nothing and live a "luxurious life". Not to mention, not all Japanese men hate their jobs, probably not more than anywhere else in the world.
I've done both here. For the first few years I was married I worked just as long as my husband for around the same salary... and then I had a child and stayed at home for the first few years taking care of my child, the house, and my in laws. Sorry to burst anyone's bubbles but, in my situation, the full time job was much easier overall. I was responsible only for myself. I made my own money.
As a homemaker you get zero respect from society. Just look at the replies on this post. You might as well be a parasite in their eyes. You're responsible for keeping everyone else's lives in order, keeping everyone else healthy and happy but if you complain at all (again, just look at this post) people will say you are whining or talk about how men have it so much worse.
The problem with Japan in this case, is not only do you have to shoulder all of the burdens of being in charge of a household, raising children, and in most cases being the lapdog of your in laws (and actually in most cases you also have at least a part time job as well), you also have to look like the perfect Mom. God forbid your figure changes after the ordeal of pregnancy and childbirth or you start getting a wrinkle or two. Grey hairs before 60? Have you let yourself go? Smile and be quiet, never let anyone know how miserable you are. Your every fulfillment must come from serving the needs of others and maintaining a perfect outer image. If that's not enough for you, then you've failed.
Some of you must not have lived in Japan long enough to understand that what people say is almost never how they actually feel.
James
@Reckless
Sorry what did you say?
rcch
every time we talk about Japanese society, the word “ pressure “ comes along ... men need to be “ successful “ and “ hard workers “ ( whatever that means ), women ( in this case, housewives ) need to be respectful, also “ hard workers “, and in some cases they need to “ look “ pretty and pure ... see the amount of pressure we,re talking about here? ... some posters in the comments section here got it wrong... this is not about men vs women... even if they don,t “ work “, Japanese women also have a really hard time and it,s not easy, at all ... the thing about Japanese society is that it,s always expecting you to be what you,re “ supposed “ to be or what you “ should be “ ... unlike other countries, in Japan there,s massive differences ( the way people think ) on what is considered being successful ( or not ), the meaning of being respected ( or not ) and what do you need to do to achieve that respect, etcetera. in many places around the world, it,s enough to be honest, never commit a crime and have a job ( any job(!) ), but in Japan it always look like you have to be something more / do a little more, if you wanna be respected, admired ...
Kobe White Bar Owner
Only if you buy into the propaganda instead of seeing through it.
lostrune2
Aren't they projecting 3 perfect mama - in the living room, kitchen, bedroom
MaikuC
Joint custody after separation and divorce is very beneficial for children and even mothers too. However, the Minister of Justice appears to prefer one parent usually the father is a mere bank account than a parent. You reap what you sew Japan.
Toasted Heretic
That's not it, basically.
Have you ever been to Japan?
There's plenty of married couples who have jobs, each working as hard as the other. Sometimes working together.
philly1
You think? For anyone whose brain still works and who knows anything about the Japanese propensity for vague answers to direct questions, no one would make the quick leap to the conclusion assumed here.
Countering with questions may mean anything but an affirmation of health or happiness. Think again.
K3PO
What nonsense.
Maria
Whataboutery at its most bloated.
It is interesting to compare how, in comments about articles describing the plight of the modern man, women overwhelmingly express sympathy and information in support of men, without immediately trying to dismiss their problems and diverting attention elsewhere.
Yes, in an article about women, reviewing a book about women, that is a good idea. I am sure, however, that in articles about men, you are the first to jump up and shout about how women are being ignored. Aren't you...?
How is this relevant? If it is, people would surely never write a word of complaint about anything that affects them, since it's worse in Somewhere Else.
Why not just read this article and discuss its contents, without running around like a distracted three-year-old at Christmas?
Cricky
Stupidity compounded by stupidity, woman are humans they might actually be smarter then men. I'd rather a female boss than a man .At least she will listen.