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I would have to pay attention to what I wear and rack my brains to figure out where I should take her for a date. It's just too much of a hassle.


An 18-year-old university student who says it is much more fun playing video games and texting all night with his male friends than going on a date. (Japan Times)

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A cause that no one has mentioned yet is consumption culture. To keep the economic engine moving, people have to keep spending, even after everyone has everything they need. So we have new versions of the same kids' shows every year, each with its own extensive toy line and officially licensed adult replica costumes. We have mass CD buys for idol pop senbatsu elections and handshake events that are framed as arts patronage. We have rapid-fire fashion changes, new phones every year with incremental upgrades, and franchise films where previous releases get a new release with more features every time a new movie comes out. We have cafes themed after video game franchises, children's television shows, and whimsical fantasy worlds.

Through all of these things, we encourage people not to let go of their childhood and to focus on satisfying their own immediate desires. Giving in to a whim or a fit of nostalgia feels good in the short term and is a lot easier and less scary than working toward a long term goal. Buying a CD to shake hands with someone you see as an ideal girlfriend is easier, quicker, less expensive (in theory), and more of a guaranteed good experience than getting to know a girl, talking with her about her interests and worries, asking her out, and going on a date. Playing a new map or gameplay mode on a video game with friends all night gives you a shared experience to talk with others about, even if online, and you also experience the thrill of discovery -- seeing something you thought you knew with a new perspective. Sure, you could go check out a different part of town, but that costs more and isn't a guaranteed good experience.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

There's also a fear of rejection. We've all been there, some of us more than others unfortunately. I don't think it's a lack of a sex drive, as ArtistAtLarge suggested - not all dates mean sex. You date to get to know someone, not get your end away ASAP... although posts I've seen in various threads on here would suggest otherwise. At 18 he's young, so I expect somewhere down the line he'll meet someone who will distract him from his joystick.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Don't worry too much. Do what others of your age do. Go out on a date and you can both text and play games without making too much eye contact or speaking to each other.

On second thoughts, stay in the house alone texting and playing video games. It's cheaper and pretty much the same thing.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

People dating asking too much of each other

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

I call it the "mendokusai" generation.

Just like the hippy generation in the sixties. Free love and all that.

-3 ( +0 / -3 )

As we say where I am from: You don't want any? More for me. Lame Japanese guys like him are turning the girls the same way.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

I call it the "mendokusai" generation. Some may prefer the "simple" generation. My son is one of them. Don't want a car. Not interested in promotion, higher income, marriage, nice house, relation, good food... Maybe I shouldn't say "not interested". Interested but it stops there. Don't want to have to work hard for something. If something seems "mendokusai" then it's "jya, iiya" or "korede iiya".

3 ( +3 / -0 )

This quote comes an article in the Japan Times. It also says many unversity age women are not interested in dating and/or sex. They would also rather go out with friends or surf they Net rather than build a relationship that creates children. Some of the reasons given for this situation is that this current group of young adults carefully observed their parents and saw how unhappy they are and have decided to go down a different path, the current economic condition is terrible and will get worse now that Abe has legalized the perpetual hiring of part-timers and women can now support themselves without getting married (obviously a good thing). Let's face it; for all practical purposes, marriage is dead in Japan.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

More for those who want to date, then.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Sounds like a testosterone problem. Is his sex drive really that low?

0 ( +1 / -1 )

An 18-year-old university student who says it is much more fun playing video games and texting all night with his male friends than going on a date.

What a wimp. Sounds like his brain and biology are still in the 5th grade. When I was 18, I was having a "good time."

-2 ( +3 / -5 )

And this is a ......university student???

0 ( +0 / -0 )

I see lots of guys like that around here.

Some seem hardly able to wait until the time that all the games and texting apps can be wired straight into their cerebral cortexes.

Others just appear to be the same kind of nervous, unsure youth I was when I was 18.

Some girls too.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Dont wear jogging pants and take her out to a bar and grill or pizza joint. That wasnt too difficult was it?

1 ( +3 / -2 )

Another reason why Japan's birth rates are dropping.

3 ( +3 / -0 )

What a loss to females everywhere

3 ( +6 / -3 )

Not a fun guy at all.

1 ( +3 / -2 )

The endgame of an education system based on duty and fear? Maybe this is what happens when the rules for action seem opaque and not learned in school. The default then is to just concentrate on me, here, now as the possibility of social faux-pas and even humiliation seem great and the payoffs cannot be imagined. It is rather sad. But he still has time...

6 ( +6 / -0 )

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