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My girlfriend told me, if this is all I make, we can’t get married, we can’t have children. Honestly, it was pretty shocking to think about.

38 Comments

Daisuke Oya, 23, who works in a cardboard factory as a machine operator. Fewer than 40% of Japan's millennials see bright futures and successful careers ahead, making them the most pessimistic in 18 countries surveyed by ManpowerGroup. (Bloomberg)

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Daisuke-san. Live a simple life. Mass consumerism has never made anyone happy. Dump that tramp! Lots of nice girls out there.

18 ( +20 / -2 )

My girlfriend told me, if this is all I make, we can’t get married, we can’t have children.

There's a red flag right there Daisuke. But what the article doesn't reveal is that she, like so many Japanese wives, will control your paycheck no matter what. If you want a "bright future", don't get married when you're so young. Stay single, enjoy your life.

17 ( +18 / -1 )

There's a red flag right there Daisuke. But what the article doesn't reveal is that she, like so many Japanese wives, will control your paycheck no matter what. If you want a "bright future", don't get married when you're so young. Stay single, enjoy your life.

I agree. Wait until your late 30s to get married. Have kids when you're 40ish.

3 ( +7 / -4 )

A 'cardboard factory', where? Original article doesn't say, either. Probably makes a difference.

http://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2016-11-23/in-japan-world-s-gloomiest-millennials-see-a-future-of-struggle

2 ( +2 / -0 )

Fewer than 40% of Japan’s millennials see bright futures and successful careers ahead,

considering that we already have a HUGE population decline and now less than half think they have bright futures and successful careers ahead, you can see the population decline spike. Japan is in dire straits

4 ( +6 / -2 )

I cannot imagine the circumstances where I would even contemplate a future controling of my partners/husbands income. As a bonafide naive romantic to be joined in matrimony, means we pool are resources where appropriate. My issues are having to give up my independence, cupids arrow has yet to work it magic.

Until this LDP government makes good on countless pledges and promises to raise the fiscal expectations for equal pay, for part time employees carrying out identical tasks and functions then Daisuke Oya, 23 future prospects of marriage and raising a family will remain little more than a pipe dream.

6 ( +6 / -0 )

Daisuke-san. Live a simple life. Mass consumerism has never made anyone happy. Dump that tramp! Lots of nice girls out there.

Mass consumerism keeps the vast majority of people, yourself included, employed. It provides the jobs, the money, and the tax revenue which builds the roads, schools, and other infrastructure. It gives us longer, healthier, and nore interesting lives.

Living a "simple life" is a wonderful excuse for not trying very hard, or justifying indolence. Those who truly believe in a simple life should become monks, missionaries, or volunteers in developing countries, but these jobs require hard work and personal sacrifice. Most advocates of a simple life live simply because they don't want to work hard or make personal sacrifices. The greatest of all sins is failing to live up to the full potential you were born with. The best way to make the world a better place is to be as successful as you can possibly be.

Those who don't have children almost invariably regret it. The thought of dying alone, and having no one to pass on your life and it's experiences to is depressing, to say rhe least. A human life is an amazing story of experiences, when one dies without children, that book is closed forever. Having children adds to your life, rather than taking away from it. Too bad Daisuke-san doesn't realize that he can have anything he wants if he makes the effort to get it.

-10 ( +7 / -17 )

My girlfriend told me, if this is all I make, we can’t get married, we can’t have children.

Also, look around you, don't other people at same wage get married and have children?

4 ( +4 / -0 )

sangetsu03. What? Yes, keep buying plastic garden gnomes for your garden until all the resources of the Earth are gone. Quit talking out your preachy arse, would you?

5 ( +9 / -4 )

This sums up what it is all about, and exactly what the millionaire Japanese politicians simply do not understand. IT'S THE ECONOMY STUPID!! Now 40% of the Japanese population has irregular employment, inspite of a labor shortage. The birth rate and inflation will never take off under these circumstances. But the rich politicians (I should say political families) don't get it.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

Kids I understand. Why do you need money to get married? Simple ceremony, no kids, live and save money. Not a bad life.

7 ( +7 / -0 )

The best way to make the world a better place is to be as successful as you can possibly be. depends what you regard as success, if your referring to how much money you can make that is just sad, if it is just being happy with your life then thats great. But the truely most successful people are the ones that give their time for free helping others and are happy because of it, regardless if they've had children or not, these are the people that make the world a better place!

4 ( +7 / -3 )

Yes, keep buying plastic garden gnomes for your garden until all the resources of the Earth are gone. Quit talking out your preachy arse, would you?

How many people are employed in the making and selling of garden gnomes? Most plastic is recycled, as you well know (or should). The garden gnomes need designers to make them appealing, machines made by others must be used to make the gnomes, buildings must be built and maintained to house the machines. Workers must operate the machines. The gnomes have to be packed and boxed with packages and boxes made by other machines and people, then they must be shipped in trucks, trains, and ships created, built, and operated by other people. Then they are sold in stores to people who want a garden gnome enough to pay for it. The gnomes are advertised in papers, or on Facebook, and the people who work in these places get part of their salary from these gnomes. The store makes a percentage on the gnomes, part which goes to pay the rent on their store, the utilities, computers, cash registers, and salay for the employees, who range from minimum wage part timers to white collar professionals. The profit is taxed, and whatever is left over is deposited somewhere, and is either invested in other products, or loaned out to people who use the money to buy a car, home, business, or pay for an education. Part of the value created in the manufacturing and selling of a garden gnome eventually finds it's way into your paycheck, regardless of where you work, or what you do.

As for the depletion of resources, it is not like most resources are not renewable. The water you drink was once drank by dinosaurs, evaporated and recondensed countless times over million of years. the oil and coal used for energy comes from fossilized plants, burned and released into the air, to be reabsorbed by other plants which in turn will becomes fossilized themselves. The metals, plastics, and other materials used in the making of all goods are eventually consumed by the earth, returning to their source.

-1 ( +5 / -6 )

My girlfriend told me, if this is all I make, we can’t get married, we can’t have children. Honestly, it was pretty shocking to think about

Couple of things here: if your gf blames YOU for not earning enough my advice is LEAVE asap (and thank her for being so brutally honest and showing her true colours early in the relationship, you were about to make a massive mistake and date a selfish dragon. Good riddance).

On the other hand, if she is just saying that, as of now, both of you are not making enough to start a family but hopefully things will change then she's probably right.

No man/woman needs a partner with a massive sense of entitlement.

11 ( +11 / -0 )

If she had said "we", it would make sense. Raising families is far more sensible with some financial security. If all she wants is for hubby to make lots of money while she avoids work and goes off to ikebana, tea ceremony and eikaiwa classes, dump her and find someone else.

9 ( +10 / -1 )

are there no young japanese romantics? they don't exist? you know, the type of youth that puts love above all else, and decide to live together and fight together for their future. i suppose they exist, but JT specializes on the other end of the human spectrum.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

I met my girlfriend in the worst circunstances of my life - without a proper visa (provisional release), without a license (couldn't renew because of the visa), counting only with translation/interpretation jobs and 1000yen per hour daily jobs just to get a little bit more than 200.000 per month. She knew my situation from our second date. Their parents knew it and even had to put up with the 2, 3 surprise visits from the feds (to check if I was really living with them). I thank God every single day for having found such a kind, open minded and considerate family to accept me whatever the circunstances. Took me 29 years to find someone who I can really love and trust. Before that, I can tell you I've met at least a dozen of all kinds of girls (in Japan and in my country), some crazy, nasty girls you wouldn't believe. So my advice to you Daisuke, is: there will be always somebody special just waiting for you. It can take you years, but with luck and attitude, you will find her. No use to get frustrated and have low self-esteem because of people who never really liked you in the first place. Your future is bright, and their future.. hmm.. probably a whole sad life having to put up with somebody nasty that never really liked them in the first place, every single day for the rest of their lives.

10 ( +10 / -0 )

all you are is a cash machine. That's not a marriage.

7 ( +8 / -1 )

sangetsu:

Living a simple life does not mean failing to live up to the full potential you were born with. I live a fairly simple life, do not mass consume, and have lots of cash. Just because I have a lot of money does not mean I am suppose to complicate my life and spend like crazy.

I would assume this young guy told her his future salary or lack of as working in a cardboard factory is not using ones education. He needs to strive for greater heights, and live a simple life as he does so.

6 ( +7 / -1 )

Hey Daisuke, head to Korea or Vietnam and go to a marriage broker who will line up as many young girls as you have time to interview. All of them will be very grateful and happy to marry a Japanese man who works hard no matter what he makes.

0 ( +5 / -5 )

Hey Daisuke, head to Korea or Vietnam and go to a marriage broker who will line up as many young girls as you have time to interview. All of them will be very grateful and happy to marry a Japanese man who works hard no matter what he makes.

Line up young girls to interview, and choose a girl who is going to be just so grateful that the Japanese man selected her? LOL

-1 ( +3 / -4 )

Since japan approves of the situation whereby over 40% of the working population can only find crap part time and contract jobs, of course great swathes of people have no hope for the future. This why the economy will never recover and simply continue to its straight dive into the abyss.

2 ( +5 / -3 )

Living a "simple life" is a wonderful excuse for not trying very hard, or justifying indolence.

@sangetsu - I really want to like you, but you make it tough. I agree with the self-fulfilment and potential stuff you talk about. You are right, but you are over the top. A simple life is without a doubt ideal. The majority of the losers I see in the world are losers because they are chasing the newest car, the latest gadget, a house that will stand out from all the houses in the neighborhood, a life that will stand out from their neighbor's life, or at least keep up with it. All meaningless crap.

This guy needs to learn that money comes, and money goes. It's one of the more fluid things in the universe. He needs a girlfriend who can understand that, and he needs to understand that himself.

I have busted my butt for a bundle, and also made a bundle for almost no effort on my part. If I start to feel a slight twinge of guilt for the easy money, I remind myself of all the hard money I had to scramble for. Life is filled with potential, and we don't need to sell plastic garden gnomes that will pollute the earth and eventually end up in out bodies as microplastics to make ends meet.

Daisuke is 23, and has the world in front of him. The best advice I can give him is to go with a woman who can see his potential, and who is not fixated on the pennies he makes today. One way or another, we mostly manage to support out kids (barring catastrophic events).

3 ( +4 / -1 )

You don't have to accept the fact that Japanese wives often control the paychecks. For me that is beyond unacceptable. I'm an American married to a Japanese wife. We both tend to spend our money as wisely as possible.

5 ( +5 / -0 )

I worked for Manpowergroup as a temp for about 6 months back in the late 80's. 3 different jobs, low pay, no health insurance, no raises.

I find it odd they are publishing studies about pessimism when they are the ones who help create it by lobbying the Gov to change the laws in their favor. Temp jobs can help in a pinch, but they should stop being used to replace short and full time jobs.

As for you Daisuke, I understand. That's the great thing about life, it's always changing. And dump her too.

4 ( +4 / -0 )

"Living a "simple life" is a wonderful excuse for not trying very hard, or justifying indolence"

Not trying very hard and indolence at work are wonderful things for me. I have many hobbies such as playing music, learning languages along with consuming alcohol and going to bed with my partner.

The idea that I should exhaust my imagination and energy at work is utterly preposterous.

Get a life.

8 ( +9 / -1 )

Jimizo: Better said than my comment above. Go surfing to and do art.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

She is realistic. If neither of them have any career potential, they are stuck in their 1DK with nothing left at the end of the month. She is not dumping him, just stating the fact that they are both in a situation of poverty. Roughly 99¨% of the J-youth that didn't get a degree are in the situation. And most they don't have the parents on either side able to help them. Some graduates also fall in that hell to, but with their education, and wealthier familties, they can hope a better next job.

Why do you need money to get married? Simple ceremony, no kids,

Without kids, without health insurance, etc, no need to get married. They can just keep living together and share expenses.

Japanese wives

Not the point. He'd get the same answer in any country, probably even more in Europe than in Japan (were there are still many irresponsible girls that live at parents and imagine they are entitled to a full STAHM life). My cousin said that to her ex. They've split 10 yrs later. They had not improved their situations, on the contrary.

This guy needs to learn that money comes, and money goes.

Sounds like the life of Donald Trump. I have not lived it, not seen anyone around me either. For modest to average people, dramatic changes of your financial situation tend to occur in the bad way. Improving your siuation is always possible but it's a very long and limited process.

Live a simple life.

Another thing for the riches.

The majority of the losers I see in the world are losers because they are chasing the newest car, the latest gadget, a house that will stand out from all the houses in the neighborhood

Exactly, you're talking about the insatisfaction of bobos. It's about a guy that earns peanuts. He is not going to renounce to the villa and other luxuries as he never had that and is not even eligible to loan to buy a scooter. After paying the minimum possible for a space under a roof, food, clothes and transport, on good months, he has 10000 yen maximum for materialistic splurges...

0 ( +1 / -1 )

I think what the girlfriend said was very responsible. Now hold on, I'm not justifying her demeaning behavior. All I'm saying is that what she said could be a wake up call for the guy. He's young, he not earning that much to be honest, and getting married at that stage will diminish whatever potential he had for the future. Plus he could be considered lucky to not get on with her (if she is as bad as how the title of this article made it seem, for all we know, she could have really looked out for him...just in a blunt way). Just don't rush into things people.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Absolutely correct. In the present economic climate wages are too low, plus there is no job security. So one cannot get married, have children, buy a house, etc. The axe can fall on you at any time. The 21st century is a regression into a new Dark Age.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

assuming she will be staying home with any children and they will be living on his income alone then yes she makes sense. does he make enough for rent/mortgage, food, transpo, etc etc ? if not then he does not make enough for them to have kids.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

The idea that I should exhaust my imagination and energy at work is utterly preposterous.

Spot on.

I just quit a job that had me so exhausted that I all I wanted to do was sleep after work. I had enough. Life is short, enjoy the time you have left.

2 ( +2 / -0 )

Japanese companies are cheap, paying as little as they have to. Has the man in question looked around for other better paying jobs, or is he plugging away at his current company, blindly accepting what he is given and hoping he might get a pay rise at some point?

1 ( +1 / -0 )

My wife is a very responsible, independent and hard working person, never ever confronted me and told me "I need to earn more or else..." Never asked to "manage" my money as well. Her attitude just makes me happy and willing to hand every cent I earn in case she gets pregnant, I will be more than happy earning some 300.000 and living by 30.000 for myself, her smile and her care for our family will be my ultimate goals.

Now I wonder where are all those girls that pressed me during the early stages of our relationship, or those who brought me to the most expensive restaurants when I suggested a quick, noon snack just to fill our stomachs while on the move to somewhere else. (all on me of course) Some even blatantly stated they will never ever work (not even part time job) after they get married, all I can do is to thank them for their sincerity and wish a good luck.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

over 40% of the working population can only find crap part time and contract jobs

Yes, and over 80% of said jobs are held by women.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

anyways marriage is an outdated institution. say hello to permanent polyamory. you help raise all the kids cuz you certainly have no idea which, if any, are yours...

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Reckless: anyways marriage is an outdated institution. say hello to permanent polyamory. you help raise all the kids cuz you certainly have no idea which, if any, are yours...

There are communes in Japan ... don't know if they're the free love type.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

If Daisuke likes his job then its up to him to seek out better employment if he wants to please her. His gf shouldnt be running his life. If he doesn`t make enough for her then perhaps she should find that person.

This is a monkey see monkey do type of reaction by his gf. Seems like a competition.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

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