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My husband thinks of me as the children's mother, plus his mother. When you think of a woman as your mother, you don't make sexual advances to her.

7 Comments

"Emi," one of 3,000 married women surveyed by Shukan Post magazine on their sex lives. According to the survey, 21.9% said they never have sex with their husbands anymore, while 40% said they have or would like to have extramarital affairs.

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40% said they have or would like to have extramarital affairs.

There is obviously a market.

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I think it is not uncommon for a couple's sex life to decline after having children but if your husband sees you as his mother you have a bigger problem which started before the children came.

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Anyone who has Japanese married friends (both male and female) knows this already. Makes no sense to me,, but have heard the same or similar comments often. Yes, there is indeed a market in unfulfilled married women (and hostess bars/soaplands etc cater for the men).

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Well, its not always completely the husband's fault. A lot of times as soon as the woman feels secure, the sweatpants, hairnet, glasses come out, they turn into obasan, and its hard to see them as sexual beings. I think J-girls are indoctrinated that their highest fulfillment will come shooting out a kid or two...the man is just a means to an end.

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Nothing new here. The figures are probably higher but many women may be ashamed to admit it.

When the woman's voice becomes sharp and shrill, the man starts to hear his own mother and something is reawakened inside, IMHO.

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My husband thinks of me as..., plus his mother.

Yes. It is def different elsewhere where they say most men marry women who resemble their mothers, in one way or another.

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This comment sounds vaguely familiar. Heard it many times already, but it was always like

"I think of my husband as being one of my children. As my child, I won't accept sexual advances from him."

Seems like a classical example of cognitive dissonance :-)

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