Homeschooler comments

Someone who has no respect for parents and blames the victims of bullying for being bullied has no place working in a school, tmarie. It is never ever the victims fault, and attitudes like the one you show cause immense pain for those on the receiving end.

As for Abe its none of his business what parents call their children, and not the government's place to have a say in the issue in any shape or form.

Whilst I sympathize with her for not wanting to go into the school and listen to their excuses and meaningless drivel, and I know the heartbreak of having your child bullied at school, going in with a knife was not going to help anyone. She was wrong to threaten the teacher and other children in such a potentially dangerous way. Who was to know what her intent was? Whilst she may have only intended to scare, in the end she presented as an out of control person with a knife in a room of children.

She needed to either move the child to a new school, teach him herself, or give him tools to make him "bully proof" if she hadn't the imagination or desire to find a better way than continuing with the school he was attending. She was an idiot at best. Its all well and good causing a scene, but what good will it have done her, her child, or the other people she affected.

The problem in my opinion is not the lack of sidewalks, its lack of care and desire of parents to be with children and supervise them. There are places to go with open spaces, even in the centre of Tokyo, and as long as a parent is accompanying them on the journey there, it is perfectly safe.

Ive seen children being allowed to hang off balconies and stair railings,unsupervised under 5's, and slightly older kids being used as babysitters. It is pure chance that those children do not have an accident on the balcony, stairs or road, nevermind the fact that they are bothering other people because their (in my opinion) lazy mother cannot be bothered to get out there and take her kids to the park and ensure their day to day safety and development.

I HOLD my young children's hands when we walk along the street, and make sure I am giving instructions to the older one to remind them to look and listen and wait for me to cross the street. The babies go on the inside always as we walk down the street. Its not rocket science. People shouldnt have children if they have no interest in being a parent.

Even on a quiet street inaccessible to cars or even bikes, a three and a five year old need and deserve the guidance and protection of a carer. There are many dangers to children this small, not just vehicles, and expecting them to be strong and sensible enough to take care of themselves and siblings is asking too much of them. A car or bike travelling at 20mph can still kill or maim a child, and lets face it some people break the speed limit. No matter what the speed of the car, the ONLY person to blame here is the parent in charge at the time.

In many other countries a parent would be charged with child neglect for allowing these children out alone.

As much as I dislike government intervention into the family, there needs to be parenting classes for first time parents.

It sounds like just another money-making proposition masquerading as a school. No education is going to be free from the political or philosophical bias of its teachers, however educating with the goal of producing "Asian style" thinking, instead of academic rigor and logical thought is particularly odious.

There never was a time or a place where a 3 year old and a five year old were safe to play outside without adult supervision. My blood runs cold at the thought of any child this age being outside alone, let alone near a road. These parents have been utterly feckless and their uselessness has led to this tragic death.

Whilst certain children are being dragged back and forth across land, culture and language, and spending precious time and effort just coping with cultural and linguistical changes, Ild much rather mine concentrated on the language they will be using the most in the future, and on their academic studies, thanks.

Whilst doing something lovely for children affected by the disaster is a noble cause, I really dont think this is a good idea. Not many people have 100k spare, let alone families with children. It is far too much money to ask each family to provide. Also how are host families or the Sendai families to know whether either side are safe and suitable to be around children?

Disney is excrutiatingly expensive and so plastic. Wouldnt a nice day at somewhere cheaper, like a family farm, be cheaper, and perhaps a lot less stressful all around.

Tepco, Disney or other corporate interests should be picking up the bill.

Believe me Ive looked around me here for a reasonably long time, and most of what I see in Japan is awful. Bad education system unless you pay and go for a good international school, terrible attitude towards non Japanese people, or mixed Japanese people, dire health service, bad attitude towards work/life balance. We are only here until we manage to sort out visas and a decent career move for my husband. We are lucky here, he has a decent job, just no time to spend with us. Who wants to equip their children to spend every waking hour at work, as a virtual slave to the corporation?

The economy is not going to get any better, Ild much rather have my children with fluent English and passable Japanese, and give them the chance to live and work in a much more forgiving and pleasant society. When he leave Japan, at least my children will go into the school system, with no need to play catch up with their English, to the detriment of their other studies.

From what Ive seen, children who go to Japanese schools here, even with one foreign parent, are not anywhere near a native level in their speech, reading or writing in English. It depends on what you are content with for your children, I suppose.

Cleo, when I came to Japan, and was first with my now husband, I loved the country. I was fascinated by Japanese culture, had a strong interest in experiencing life here, and was very excited about being part of the wider family. I went into the situation desperate to please and be part of the family and made every effort. Unfortunately they were not quite so happy about him marrying me, nor about their grandchildren. They do not pay my husband, our children, let alone me a passing courtsey, let alone familial love and care. I would have adored a mother in law who wanted to help me with the children, come out with us, be part of our lives, and a grandpa too for that matter. What I got was a selfish old cow who cant even be bothered to wish her grandkids happy birthday. Your life here might be roses, but you seem to judge everybody else's experiences by your own.

Japan, and my wider family here over the years has worn away my good will, my interest and my fondness for the culture and aesthetic.

Ive no interest in useless Japanese/English bilingualism, decent French and Spanish will stand them in far better stead, or dare I say it, Mandarin and Cantonese.

Cleo, once again, having come to dislike the country, does not mean I am being disrespectful or unloving to my wonderful, dear family. I tried for years to be friendly, and kind, part of the family, but you can't make people act decently towards you, however hard you try, and my my increasing age I am just not bothering anymore. They are the ones missing out.

Squidbert, thanks for the sodastream link! I had no idea they did them here.

We love camping, and actually have a very good Coleman's tent. Their lights are also excellent, and well priced. August was far too hot for us in the tent, but September when it starts to cool off was really lovely.

Rizzo, I couldn't agree more, and I truely hope we get away from Japan as soon as possible. Im my opinion getting your family away from Japan was a wonderful thing to do for them long term, and Im glad to hear your wife is happy with the situation.

I have been nothing but polite to my inlaws, Cleo, more than I can say about their treatment of me, and I find your accusation rude beyond belief. Whilst we live in the same country, we do not have the same family, nor the same experiences. Your inlaws treated your children wonderfully, which is great. Mine did not. No otoshidama, no weekend visits, not a kind word or a tiny bit of interest shown, and Im far from the only foreign wife in this situation.

My husband speaks good English, and there is no way I would forbid him to speak to our children in English. Then again Im not someone who wants to make a lot of rules and regulations for my husband, he gets enough of that at work. He is adult enough to make his own decisions about how he speaks to his own children and in what language. Ive children who are doing wonderfully in language arts, and their fathers non native, but excellent English has done nothing to damage that.

When my children see their poor and much loved father work inhumane hours, their grandparents not bother with them, whilst spoiling the "Japanese" grandkids absolutely rotten, when they are called "gaijin" in the country in which they were born, and are subject to idiotic questions by random strangers in the street, I do believe Japan has done a perfectly good enough job of making them dislike it immensely without any input from me.

You can love the person without loving the country. Is a Russian person not allowed to say anything against Russia? Does a German have to love Germany to have self worth? Country and self are two separate issues.

My children will be native speakers of English, that is the only language which matters to us. Yes, they can understand spoken Japanese, but our family language is English, their father speaks excellent English, they got more than enough Japanese input from the environment.

Rizzo, I would be devestated if my children entered the Japanese corporate soul destroying meat grinder. Ive seen what its done to my husband, and Im damned if they are having my children too. Free thinkers, who can innovate, think for themselves and make themselves understood in the international community is what we are aiming for. Not state dependent, dull and compliant. In my honest opinion bilingualism in Japanese/other language is more or less useless. Japan is not the economic powerhouse it was, and its hardly a wonderful place to live and work.

I would not be happy if my children merely spoke "good English", it is nowhere near enough if they want to live, study and work in an English speaking country. My experience with Japanese elementary schools has been dire. Bullying, desperately poor instruction, monocultural and unaccepting of any child or parent who was not "pure" Japanese.

The sooner we, as a family can get away from Japan the better. The Fukushima disaster was exacerbated by the fact that not one of those employees could think laterally. The shop was closed, so they didn't buy a battery. What does that say about the education system. Even my toddler could come up with better solutions than they were able to fathom. I absolutely agree with you Frank, stay away from Japan!

I completely agree with you, Frank. Unfortunately leaving Japan is not as easily said as done, at least in the short term, but it is our goal.

When you see the results of the dire education system in Japan, the total lack of common sense, lateral thinking, problem solving abilities, the institutional bullying, the lack of opportunities for females, and the downright inhumane life of the salaryman, I would do anything in my power to ensure my children are equipped to enter further education in a country with a better regard for work-life balance.

Having a native English ability is of far greater benefit than fluent Japanese.

Im no prude, but I think people should take off the rose tinted glasses. AV work is hardly easy money for the women - or men - that it employs. The porn industry objectifies women, and men for that matter, and ruins lives.

I watched celebrity rehab, a porn actress called Marie Carey, seemed honestly to have no self esteem at all, was a chronic alcoholic, wanted out of the business, but was left returning to it to try and pay her bills, and thus going back to the drink and the self esteem problems. From what I have read she is just one in a long line of train wreck ex adult video stars. I would never call them sluts, and its not a question of morality for me, just it is not a physically healthy or mentally and emotionally healthy job for many of the people drawn into it, and once in, getting out is not easy.

Cyclemate, so you admit to abusing cats? You would think you would be too ashamed to boast about it!

Ild rather have outdoor cats than an unchecked rodent population. I cant see how a few bottles of water would deter an intelligent creature like a cat.

Marie, some people were made late home, some people had to get taxis, some poor people witnessed it happening. However two people here lost their lives, were pushed to it either by the cruelty of their peers or goodness knows what worries, and you are thinking of yourself and people inconvenienced? Ild prefer to think of the families of those involved and hearing that it is bullying yet again that drives a child to take their own life, be very thankful that I have the means and wherewithal to homeschool mine.

Ild love to go here, it looks too "nice" to take the children along to though. Nippon, was Christmas dinner there good? Im not cooking this year, and we want to go out for Christmas lunch.

Are people really going to demand that this poor man's family is financially ruined as well as having to mourn his death? I feel terribly sorry for both these people, sad that they couldnt see any other way, sad that they have nothing in their lives which they feel they worth hanging around for. Those inconvenienced seriously need to get a bit of perspective and work on their empathy skills.

He calls having a child "the stupidest thing he ever did"! I do hope the poor child concerned never reads that. Delightful man.

I actually really liked Witch's Trick, the pumpkin was also nice. I stole a little of the mint one from one of the kids, and agree it was lovely. Still isnt a patch on my usual apple and tea flavor.

How utterly sad that this is a viable career choice for some young women out there. Surely even working at a combini or fast food joint is preferable to this! It sounds borderline dangerous, boring and repulsive. Just as saddening to think there are men so devoid of human contact they will pay to be held.

DP812, many many thanks. I just managed to get over the region blocking thanks to you, and set up a US itunes account to purchase whole seasons as they come out. You have just saved my evenings from having to watch Ellen repeats on Sky. I do want to stay legal, as harsh as those laws are, simply because I dont want or need the hassle or worry. I tried to get an itunes US account before and just couldnt get it to work for me.

Those islands are not worth a single life, I agree Elbuda, that said there are some hot heads on both sides who would relish a skirmish.

Hulu isnt up to date - the latest Grey's Anatomy episode on there is 2010, only the first season of Glee etc. Up to date programming still isnt available.

Patrick, I totally agree. Its time to make a serious effort to wind up everything in Japan and move, despite the financial issues in doing so.

What kind of country bans tv shows and dancing? It would be funny if it weren't so sinister.

Things like music, Ill listen on youtube, or the clip on itunes, and purchase the tracks. For instance I wanted the new Bob Dylan album, and purchased the tracks I wanted from itunes, after weeding out the weak tracks I didn't want. Same goes for other music I wanted. Im happy to pay for services provided.

There isnt a way to buy timely access to tv or movies in English. If there was, Ild gladly give them my money. In fact I do give them the money by paying for Sky, I just don't get the content. I pay for the privilege of a lot of adverts and year-old content on at odd times of the day. The VOD content is mostly only in Japanese and very limited anyway.

Other things you can find fixes for, and put up with the inconvenience. I can go to Costco and buy imported, safe food. I can homeschool the children. We can have regular trips to see loved ones. That said Japan is getting more and more unliveable by the year.

I pay for sky, I would be happy to pay for HBO, or other programming but there is NO way for me to do so, and get the content in a timely fashion.

Give me a way to pay for it, and Ill pay. Sky would have it on in a year anyway, and I pay for that year in year out.