Ian Duncan comments

Posted in: 10 simple ways to ruin a Japanese wife’s day See in context

Jimizo -

I've been told by my good lady that reading during one's ablutions brings bad luck to the entire home.

I suspect it's just an instinct to shut down avenues of pleasure, no matter how mild, whenever they are detected.

Fun Police are knocking on my window...

4 ( +5 / -1 )

Posted in: 10 simple ways to ruin a Japanese wife’s day See in context

I get grief for using the bog after she's cleaned it. I asked her where she would prefer me to move my bowels, but await a better suggestion. I suspect she'd rather I bake it until I get to work.

Sadly, as my daily offering at the Temple of Cloaca takes place with Teutonic efficiency and the regularity of a fine Swiss timepiece, that will not be possible, I fear.

A better question is why doesn't she wait until I go to work before she starts trying to undo what I have wrought?

4 ( +6 / -2 )

Posted in: Consumer prices rise at fastest pace since late 2008 See in context

Everything, including daily essentials are more expensive. So we have less to spend. Therefore we don't buy as much.

Can someone explain how that helps the economy?

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Posted in: 10 simple ways to ruin a Japanese wife’s day See in context

This reminds me of the old gag:

Why do husbands die before their wives?

Because they want to.

0 ( +1 / -1 )

Posted in: Decontamination of Fukushima hotspots costly and complex See in context

Decontamination of Fukushima hotspots costly and complex

And bungled and futile.

8 ( +9 / -1 )

Posted in: Distraught owner furious at ANA after dog dies from heatstroke during transport See in context

the girl’s family has signed an agreement not to demand ANA’s culpability in the pet’s death or seek further compensation through a lawsuit.

Why would they do that, if they're furious?

1 ( +4 / -3 )

Posted in: Abe may sweeten sales tax hike with corporate tax cut See in context

Saxon Salute - a most succinctly-phrased riposte. "We are going to kick you in the bollocks. It is your duty to pretend this is necessary. If you will not do this, leave these shores."

A Saxon salute is the best such a quisling buffoon merits.

As anyone with half a lobe could have predicted, Abe plans to fund his donors with cuts, and gouge the shortfall from the drones, who are expected to parrot "thank you sir, may I have another."

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Posted in: Beam us up See in context

Lowly -

My problem is the fact that distribution rights, translations, subtitling, etc are matters which affect every non-English speaking country. Yet Japan, which is one of the biggest movie markets in the world, cannot pull its finger out and is almost always one of the last places on earth films ever get released. That applies whether they are guaranteed money-spinners such as Star Trek or Bond films, or art house pictures, or anything in between. Usually this is the last place on earth to see a film.

For such a developed country, with so many people willing to fork out hand over fist for entertainment, this is indefensible. If Ulan Bator can sort out subtitles in May, then there is no reason the moviegoers of Tokyo should have to wait until late August.

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Posted in: Beam us up See in context

I always buy films delayed in this ludicrous way like this from Amazon UK or US. I'm not waiting 3 months after the film gets released in Mongolia and Lithuania to pay 1800 yen x 3, plus popcorn and petrol to go and see it in the cinema once.

I wouldn't mind so much, but there's a poster for this film up on a drinks machine in my local train station, and it's been up there so long it's fading and peeling. Why promote something you're sitting on for a financial quarter?

Promote something if people can see it, or don't promote it and hope people won't notice there is a world elsewhere.

This nonsensical, archaic and insular policy really does no-one any favours.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Posted in: Drink up See in context

Organised, company-mandated "fun". I would rather go to the dentist.

2 ( +4 / -2 )

Posted in: 10 bystanders burned during fire safety drill in Shiga See in context

Throwing alcohol onto an oil fire? What could possibly go wrong? Oh, that's right - the same thing as went wrong "moments before at a rehearsal for the drill."

So he did it once, it exploded, and he decided to do the same thing with children close?

What a moron.

6 ( +8 / -2 )

Posted in: Message for voters See in context

I thought The Walking Dead was finished until October?

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Posted in: Father of TV 'talent' Rola put on int'l wanted list for fraud See in context

Rola is a comedic genius whether you guys like her or not

Nikku - Now that is funny.

5 ( +7 / -2 )

Posted in: 2 men arrested for dumping 2,250 batteries in streets See in context

It's their own volt. Ohm y goodness. Watt ever next?

-2 ( +1 / -3 )

Posted in: TEPCO admits radioactive cesium in water flowing into Fukushima plant See in context

"We'll have to correct the way we analyse sample data" said...a spokeswoman.

Translation: we must find a different way to reach an "everything is fine" result.

13 ( +14 / -1 )

Posted in: Miike's action film gets booed at Cannes See in context

Fadamor...I have never taken part in a war, but am prepared to believe from the opinions of those who have that it isn't enjoyable. Similarly, I have no desire to sit through two hours of something which a panrl of international experts agree is overacted juvenile pap before I form an opinion on it. I haven't seen tonight's "variety" shows yet, but I expect they might involve eating, shouting and gurning. Some things can be predicted.

Maria, thank you for the information.

3 ( +5 / -2 )

Posted in: Miike's action film gets booed at Cannes See in context

My wife tells me this film got a standing ovation at Cannes. Can any other readers lend any evidence to her claim? I suspect she might be having another one of her turns.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

Posted in: S Korean media slam Abe's 731 jet photo See in context

A Realist - I'm curious as to why you are so keen to change the topic of this thread.

Abe posed with a symbolically-charged number. Whether it was intentional or just a blunder, by doing so he has given those countries who make a habit of criticising Japan a perfect piece of ammunition with which to do so.

We are not talking about whether ot not other countries are perfect. this topic is about Abe giving the thumbs-up over a military plane bearing the inscription "Leader: S. Abe 731".

Of course those elements hostile to Japan are going to have a field day with this. Why did he give them such a chance?

-1 ( +2 / -3 )

Posted in: S Korean media slam Abe's 731 jet photo See in context

A realist: thank you very much for sharing your assumptions about me with the world. May I now cordially redirect you to the topic of this thread: whether or not victims of Japanese imperial atrocities have the right to take offence when, in the same week as one high-profile Japanese right-winger says it was necessary to rape thousands of women and girls, another right-winger, the Prime Minister, sits giving the thumbs-up to a historically-significant symbol of atrocity?

If you read the article carefully, you will note that the topic is not "how similar is Ian Duncan to other 'gaijin' who, being all alike, fail to understand the culture".

The topic is, I would suggest, how can a head of state fail to see the importance of not giving enemies of his country a stick with which to beat him?

-3 ( +1 / -4 )

Posted in: S Korean media slam Abe's 731 jet photo See in context

I'm fascinated by the double standards on display here. We are expected to believe The Koreans have no right to be angry about Abe posing near a historically-charged symbol of Japanese atrocity. That they Koreans are overreacting and playing the victim.

Des anyone remember a couple of years ago when the British quiz show QI made an innocuous, light-hearted comment about the A-bombs? Suddenly everyone in the world had a moral duty to apologise for aggression. The embassy got involved, and the media got frothed up into a lather of self-pitying victim hood until the BBC was browbeaten into a grovelling apology for its insensitivity.

Now the Koreans are supposed to laugh off this - at best, an unfortunate and avoidable accident, at worst, a deliberately provocative and calculated insult?

Of all the possible solutions to this diplomatic blunder, accusing the Koreans of playing the victim card is most ill-advised.

-2 ( +5 / -7 )

Posted in: National obsession with cleanliness bodes ill for health See in context

If there is a national obsession with cleanliness, why is there never any soap in subway toilet facilities?

Perform a bowel movement, use cheap, one-ply toilet paper, then let a trickle of water cascade on your fouled fingers for a second and get on the busiest mass transport system in the world.

Same with public parks. Run around with the kids for three hours, then have a picnic. Want to wash your hands before you eat? Just rub the grime around a little with some water. Then eat.

This is a classic example of Doublethink. We are a) obsessed with cleanliness and b) don't cover our mouths when we sneeze.

10 ( +13 / -4 )

Posted in: JR East train travels 48 kms with door open See in context

48 km/s is pretty fast.

-4 ( +5 / -9 )

Posted in: Spent fuel cooling system back up at Fukushima No. 3 reactor See in context

“We have no information at hand about the cause,” the TEPCO spokesman said.

Translation: The rat story didn't work as well as we thought, give us some time to think up something you'll like.

He then put on his big shoes and red nose, and tried balancing a bucket of water on a stick.

2 ( +4 / -2 )

Posted in: Father dies sheltering 9-year-old daughter from blizzard See in context

Tragic as this is, it is a refreshing change to read about someone who was a loving parent, instead of the ceaseless litany of child abuse and cruelty we seem to get on this site.

Compare this article with this one: http://www.japantoday.com/category/crime/view/man-arrested-for-shaking-6-month-old-daughter-to-death

The wrong man is dead.

2 ( +4 / -2 )

Posted in: Father dies sheltering 9-year-old daughter from blizzard See in context

This is a very moving story.

3 ( +4 / -1 )

Posted in: 10 things single Japanese women want from a man See in context

I would want him to quietly and attentively listen to my complaints about daily life.

Editor - I think the words "constant, whining" and "every single thing he does or fails to do to my ludicrous standards of satisfaction" have been missed out of the translation.

4 ( +5 / -2 )

Posted in: Miss Hooters Japan 2013 - vote now See in context

but conversations are usually vapid enough to toss yourself out the restaurant window

I tried that once and got asked to leave.

6 ( +8 / -2 )

Posted in: Stars ooze sex appeal, and show skin, at Grammys See in context

"possibly expose breast nipples"

As opposed to what other kind of nipple?

-1 ( +0 / -1 )

Posted in: First to quit See in context

I'm wondering why JT does not clarify that the reason he was forced to resign is a rape charge from 2004, after which he paid the alleged victim 100 million yen "compensation"?


Ah, the gool old reliable, honourable LDP. They never fail to lower the nadir. Can you imagine the uproar there would have been six months ago if this had involved a DPJ minister?

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

Posted in: Gargling deemed ineffective measure against flu by health ministry See in context

Tessa 08:49

Why don't they try supplying soap, paper towels and HOT water in public conveniences?

A very astute observation. I will never understand why it is possible to afford to install infra-red sensors to detect when one has finished having a wee, or little sound effects to protect the modesty of anyone afraid of being overheard performing a bodily function in a lavatory, but the cost of a spot of soap is prohibitive.

A station near me just recently renovated its bogs at, I'm assuming, considerable expense. And somebody has evidently made a conscious decision to not install soap dispensers. So anyone using said bog now has to board public transport with filthy hands. This is why diseases get spread in this burg. The reliance on vapid ceremonies - gargling, or a film of gauze as a crucifix against the flu - takes priority over the elementary hygiene of a spot of soap and hot water.

3 ( +6 / -3 )

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