Ian Hart comments

Posted in: American man arrested over murder of wife at Tokyo Family Court See in context

I definitely don't condone what happened to the wife, and it's hard to judge either side with so little information. However, I can't help but wonder what drove the man to commit this crime. As a married man in Japan, I can probably relate to some of what he has felt. And I have several friends who have experienced how ugly divorce can be here, especially when their Japanese wives weren't willing to cooperate. I've seen friends torn apart by their divorce, especially when children were involved. Their Japanese wives used lies and accusations to get exactly what they wanted, which was everything. There is no way for a foreign man to get custody of their children. I've seen men not only losing their homes, money and possessions, but also their children. Leading them to lose their sanity and jobs. It's not like back home where arrangements are fair, and both people come out of a divorce equally. Here, the Japanese wife gets it all, and the court will side with whatever they say. I'm a happily married man (At the moment haha), but the lack of control and options that I have here has hit me hard at times. And if my wife ever decided to leave me, I know I'd probably lose everything, including my sanity. Everyone has a breaking point, and when that happens, ideas like revenge and suicide become more likely.

Apparently, there are a lack of joint custody laws and property settlements in Japanese divorce cases, and courts usually side with the mother. I also read that the wife contacted the police in August, because she wanted it on record that he was mentally unstable. She then ran away with their child, leaving no way of him contacting her. It sounds very similar to something my friend went through, which led to him losing contact with his children for 2 years. He also lost his job due to taking time off to fight for custody.

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