savethegaijin comments

Posted in: What are some ways that living with a spouse are different from living with someone you’re going steady with? See in context

Nothing really, without kids. But kids change everything about your life so it's not surprising.

3 ( +3 / -0 )

Posted in: Conservatives submit ex-imperial member restoration proposal to Abe See in context

Anything to avoid a woman I guess

16 ( +17 / -1 )

Posted in: 71-year-old woman arrested for killing husband, parents-in-law See in context

Yikes, dark.

I'm not sure even a young and fit person could care for 3 elderly, ill people by themselves, much less someone in their 70's. Yeah she did something horrible but you'd think there would be a better option for these people than to left in this situation.

You'd think anyway.

17 ( +17 / -0 )

Posted in: Weightlifting is Japanese salarymen’s newest hobby, report says See in context

Two of my in-laws are personal trainers in Japan, one of which was a competitive bodybuilder. I'm a cardio junkie myself so I understand the health aspect, but they go at it hard. My brother in law works at Gold's and basically eats nothing but chicken thighs (only half kidding). He is huge for a Japanese guy and every time I've been in there there's plenty of his coworkers and clientele that are buff. Sure, there's plenty of people weight training that have bad technique, but I wouldn't say it's proportionally more than I've seen back home at my old gym in States.

Anything that will improve your fitness is good and if it's only once a week, hey, better than nothing right?

1 ( +1 / -0 )

Posted in: Police in talks with Setagaya family murder victims’ relatives about demolishing crime scene See in context

I feel like... the 8 year old boy was strangled whereas the others were stabbed. Normally that would say that the boy was the original target, maybe he knew or had seen the boy in passing. At this point, if the mother was of European decent, there is likely to be (however distant) several familial hits on the killer in public databases. If there's enough, you could triangulate them and find a close enough relative to find out who the killer is.

It's hard to imagine that this hasn't been solved yet. There is so much evidence it seems incredibly unlikely that it wouldn't be solved at all - it's strange enough it hasn't been solved yet. I think it will just take that extra push to get what evidence they already have put through slightly more developed testing procedures. Any evidence that they might have possibly missed will be incredibly degraded in a leaky, basically open, old crime scene. I get why the family doesn't want to tear it down but it won't help as the whole scene has been compromised.

-2 ( +0 / -2 )

Posted in: Living alone becoming a way of life for many, but that's not necessarily for worse See in context

Anything is fine if it doesn't hurt anyone right? I can't remember the last time I was really alone that wasn't like, in my bedroom occasionally. If I step outside the house there's immediately tons of people and we live in a double house that shares a stairwell with our in laws and they're always here. I'd kill to be alone, tbh. Back in the States I hated being alone, mainly because it was actually possible. Being constantly surrounded with hoards of people everywhere you go tends to make you long for solitude. Can't blame anyone.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

Posted in: Chinese swimming star defends failure to take doping test See in context

Then he can't compete, simple as that. He's already been proved to be a drug cheat before, do you need any more proof?

7 ( +7 / -0 )

Posted in: Model home provides model wife and model daughter so you can feel the joy of family life See in context

What kind of uselessly rich weirdo buys a brand new family sized house in Japan for a family they don’t have yet? No one I want to be neighbors with.

2 ( +3 / -1 )

Posted in: Arashi singer Ninomiya marries former announcer See in context

@Marshall Saints

C'monnnnnnn you know what I'm saying, please don't make me argue it out on a tabloid piece, it's not that deep

-2 ( +1 / -3 )

Posted in: Arashi singer Ninomiya marries former announcer See in context

@AnotherGaijinCommentator

If that's true, than thats an icy cold wedding announcement lol

5 ( +6 / -1 )

Posted in: Arashi singer Ninomiya marries former announcer See in context

Shotgun wedding. Hopefully, at least, because otherwise the statement "made the decision to take responsibility as a man." isn't the most romantic way to announce it lol

10 ( +12 / -2 )

Posted in: Japan wants to go cashless, but elderly aren't so keen See in context

Why is it that everyone in this country has to literally move at the speed of the oldest members? Seriously I have to keep a damn fax machine because my daughters school occasionally sends faxes even though they send the same damn thing by email as well. For a country that loves to tout how technologically advanced it is every chance it gets they sure seem to hate using it. I use my cell phone to pay for everything and I hate that I have to carry around a bag and a wallet full of cash, bank cards, credit cards, etc for all of the places that I can't use e-payment. Not to mention all of the places that OFFER electronic payment but then you tell the cashier you want to use apple pay and then they have to call over like 4 people just to figure out how to get it to work. Seriously.

Not to mention I'm a bit of a germaphobe and I hate handling money, it's one of the dirtiest things in the world.

We went out the other night for our anniversary to a nice bistro and the bill was like 3man and the place didn't take cards. My husband and I hate carrying large amounts of cash and we just assumed a nice, expensive restaurant would take them so my husband had to go across the street to withdraw cash which is embarrassing. I almost never carry more than 1-2 man at most and even then it makes me uncomfortable that I'll lose my wallet whereas I ALWAYS have my phone on me.

-1 ( +5 / -6 )

Posted in: Starbucks Japan unveils new Merry Strawberry Cake Frappuccino for Christmas See in context

Oh yay, more strawberry shortcake.

Is Japan aware that there is more cake in the world than a spongecake with strawberries and whipped cream? It's so boring. Every darn occasion and someone whips out one of these Cozy Corner cakes.

Don't get me wrong it's good but man I would kill for some variety. Carrot cake. Royal icing.. Buttercream. Cream cheese frosting. Chiffon cake. Pound cake. Spice cake. Genoise. Fruit cake. Amish cake. Real cupcakes, not just dry breakfast muffins with whipped cream.

I'm just having a whinge. I won't even be drinking it, honestly.

Probably just homesick, it is the holiday season now after all I guess.

1 ( +2 / -1 )

Posted in: Gov't to urge male civil servants to take more than 1-month childcare leave See in context

Ahahahahahahahahaha

My husband who works for the government can't even take off most public holidays, he was even in on New Years day last year, most of Golden Week, and recently the enthronement day. I imagine if he even told them he wanted to take a few DAYS off if I had another baby they would pitch a fit.

He even has to claim he has taken days off that he hasn't taken off otherwise they could get into legal trouble. They always say he can later take the days off without claiming them as compensation but it never happens. If he used his compiled unused "required" vacation days he could probably take off a few months straight.

We can all dream right?

6 ( +7 / -1 )

Posted in: Doctors still need to tell parents about safe infant sleep practices See in context

@commanteer

Not single motherhood in general, mother exhaustion, whatever the cause, seems to be the main cause.

Your claim that substance abuse is an issue in SIDs simply means that you don't understand what qualifies SIDS as SIDS. If a child dies because a mother is using narcotics or is drunk, it's classified as neglect resulting in accidental death, or manslaughter. There's not a test for SIDS, it's diagnosed by ruling out other possibilities. If a child dies because it suffocates on a teddy bear, the child died by suffocation, not SIDS.

Some of the higher rates of SIDS in the west can be attributed to a wider classification of what SIDS actually is. From what I've seen through personal research in Japan, a SIDS death is only assigned when absolutely no other cause can be identified (as it should be classified). A child with an unobstructed airway dying (seemingly) inexplicably during sleep. In the US they are far more likely to classify a child falling asleep on an exhausted mother on the sofa, suffocating and dying as SIDS than as accidental suffocation. An over-exhausted mother is more likely to put a baby to bed in a way that is quickest to get the infant to sleep (on its back, its side, in a swing, with a blanket, etc.) which is more likely to result in a SIDS classified death.

Probably the biggest improvement the Anglosphere could make is to expand maternity leave, extend hospital stays and encourage familial help, or the help of government funded post-natal doulas, perhaps, in the absence of such familial bonds. Also, because breastfeeding rates are also correlated, the US and UK in particular could stop their pushing of formula over breastmilk and stop demonizing mothers who choose to breastfeed in public.

Not to mention baby-wearing. While visiting the US when my daughter was 3 months old, I wore her in a carrier. Literally every time we left the house I had some comment from strangers about how back in their day they carried their babies in their arms, not like the lazy women today (or something similar). Baby wearing, babies napping (correctly!) in a proper baby carrier are FAR less likely to die of SIDS. A baby being as close to (a rested) Mom as they can for as long as they can is probably the best way to prevent SIDS. In the US there are stigmas against all of these things... breastfeeding, baby-wearing, stay at home mothers, etc... so if you're going to argue against anything, let it be these things. Don't blame poor mothers who lost their babies and call them drug users, substance abusers, etc. It's just factually wrong and quite cruel, actually.

0 ( +0 / -0 )

Posted in: Doctors still need to tell parents about safe infant sleep practices See in context

@commanteer

Not so much. Has a lot more to do, also unfortunately, with overtired mothers, and single motherhood. If you go to work 8-10 hours a day and have to take care of a child (or children) alone all night it's easier to fall asleep with them in dangerous situations.

I was a researcher on global infant mortality rates for my friend who is the head of nursing at a university in Tokyo. The longer maternity leave and the more familial help you have with a newborn in the first year, the less likely a child is to die of SIDS. Also, the longer you are in the hospital after giving birth seems to be correlated.

In the US most women go back to work between 6 and 8 weeks after birth which is when the rate of SIDS skyrockets. Also, C-sections are much more common in western countries which leads to women having to go through intense healing for several months afterward which can add stress and exhaustion on already strained new mothers. Not to mention single parent households being much more common in the 'west' than in Japan.

There's a dozen other factors which, no, don't imply that westerners are just drugged up and accidentally killing their babies. Thanks.

1 ( +3 / -2 )

Posted in: Doctors still need to tell parents about safe infant sleep practices See in context

No joke, my sister in law puts her baby to sleep face down on a body pillow to sleep. Literally her baby sleeps with its face directly in a giant pillow.

I told her it wasn't the best idea but she said 'I've never had a problem before!' and laughed.

Bed sharing can be safe as long as you have a large not too soft bed, the baby has no bedding near it, no pillows or heavy blankets and you place them on their back. We have a king sized bed and I shared with my daughter for her first two years. Granted she slept no where near me in the bed, and had no blankets or pillows, and also wore a breathing sensor attached to her diaper. When she napped alone I put a movement sensor underneath her and used a baby monitor.

Then again I definitely have anxiety problems. Maybe don't follow my advice lol

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Posted in: Republican lawmakers storm hearing room, disrupting Trump impeachment inquiry See in context

^You're joking, right?

19 ( +25 / -6 )

Posted in: Emperor Naruhito proclaims ascendancy to throne; pledges to fulfill his duty as symbol of the state See in context

National Holiday? Loose definition, everyone I know is still at work today.

0 ( +3 / -3 )

Posted in: Uniqlo pulls ad after South Korean objections See in context

I hope they stretched before that massive reach.

24 ( +28 / -4 )

Posted in: Japanese women categorize male friends by levels of intimacy, from hugging to bathing See in context

this all sounds so exhausting, no wonder no one wants to date anyone here

10 ( +10 / -0 )

Posted in: The decline in births is happening faster than official projections had envisioned, due to a shrinking pool of women of childbearing age. The children of baby-boomers are reaching their late 40s, which is causing a radical drop in births. See in context

@Reckless, you’re correct, my husband is a passionate and goal driven man. That does not, however, equate to him having to basically living at his office because his uppers say all day ‘reduce cost, no waste’ and claim to have no resources for padding the workforce so that everyone gets a little more room to breathe.

And no, sir, my husband is not out drunk with his ‘girlfriend’ or blowing his ‘bonus’ at a brothel (quite the contrary, every yen of every bonus saved for our child(ren)s future education(s)). I’m not sure what type of company you choose to keep but my husband doesn’t fall into those categories at all.

My husband is an ambitious man and a loving father, and for some reason the Japanese government’s working culture demands that he has to choose between them.

4 ( +4 / -0 )

Posted in: The decline in births is happening faster than official projections had envisioned, due to a shrinking pool of women of childbearing age. The children of baby-boomers are reaching their late 40s, which is causing a radical drop in births. See in context

In fact, Reckless... I work while my daughter is at school, take care of her the rest of the time, do all of the housework, all of the school functions, all of the cooking, and I help take care of my husband's aging parents. My husband would work the same amount of hours even if I didn't have my own job during the day. We're lucky enough to be fine with one income and if we have another child we'll be completely fine with the one until the next child goes to school. My husband is not a salary man. If all I cared about were my husband's money, I would have 'made' him quit years ago. He's been studying and working his whole life to be where he is at so who am I to demand he quit or slow down this far into the game? Nor would he ever demand that I work to give him a break, we all need breaks, thanks.

I'm criticizing the workplace practices of the Japanese government, not my husband's work ethic which is beyond reproach. It would be unfair to my husband to have another child that he could never see, likewise unfair to the child to not have access to their father.

The point is that the Japanese government is crying foul and complaining about why couples aren't having more children, meanwhile forcing Japanese fathers to separate from the families that they already have completely for less security than they've ever had.

11 ( +11 / -0 )

Posted in: The decline in births is happening faster than official projections had envisioned, due to a shrinking pool of women of childbearing age. The children of baby-boomers are reaching their late 40s, which is causing a radical drop in births. See in context

I'm fit and of child bearing age, my husband and I would love to have another child. Maybe even 2!

Oh what's that? He works for your government and is required to stay there from like 8am to midnight everyday, 6 days a week because every time someone quits you say it's not in the budget to replace them?

Oh dear... every year you move his office further and further away from our home just so his boss can look more and more prestigious on television, making my husbands commute nearly 2 hours and in the morning and 2 at night?

You forcibly 'promote' him so that he cannot make any complaint about his working hours because he is salaried despite being a contracted worker?

You low-key threaten to blackball him out of his career field if he take's the L and ditches before the end of his contract, despite you cutting his salary in half?

Let's hope nothing happens to me health wise and I can still have children when his contract is up. Let's also hope your lack of humanity doesn't kill him in the process.

14 ( +15 / -1 )

Posted in: Super typhoon on track to drench Japan's main island See in context

Supposed to have my daughters Sports Day Sunday morning. I wonder just how much debris we'll have to dig through in the courtyard to lay down our picnic blanket cause there's next to no chance they'll cancel it. God forbid they move it to the next day ya know.

9 ( +9 / -0 )

Posted in: Rugby World Cup, F1 and typhoon: What could happen? See in context

Still expected to have my daughter's sports day a few hours after it passes. Never cancel, never give up I guess.

-3 ( +0 / -3 )

Posted in: Nowadays, for fear of child predators, it is no longer considered safe in many countries to let young children go by themselves to and from school, to a friend's house, play in parks or at the beach, go to shops and so on. What was it like when you were growing up? See in context

Well I was molested by a neighbor, my friend's father, as a child growing up in upper-middle class suburbia in America so yeah, horrible people have been around forever. So maybe it would have been better if people had paid more attention to their children back then as well?

10 ( +11 / -1 )

Posted in: Parents of 7-year-old girl missing for 10 days at Yamanashi campsite speak of agony, hope See in context

I really hope they find her. I couldn't possibly imagine their pain. Just reading the article, all I want to do is hold my daughter and be grateful that she is safe with me. You never know what could happen.

5 ( +6 / -1 )

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